


In This Sleep of Death (What Dreams May Come)

by HappyJuicyfruit



Series: Sullied Flesh [2]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, BAMF Lydia Martin, BAMF Stiles, Charlie the dog is the best, Contractor Derek Hale, Derek Hale Takes Care of Stiles Stilinski, Dreams and Nightmares, Established Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski, Fluff and Smut, Hale Family Feels, Hurt Stiles, M/M, Magical Stiles Stilinski, Necromancy, Oral Sex, Pack Bonding, Pack Feels, Panic Attacks, Past Abuse, Past Drug Use, Possession, Post-Possession, Scott tries to be a better friend, Stilinski Family Feels, Talking To Dead People, Therapy, Tired Stiles Stilinski, Worried Derek Hale
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-09
Updated: 2019-07-18
Packaged: 2020-04-23 17:24:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 56,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19155619
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HappyJuicyfruit/pseuds/HappyJuicyfruit
Summary: Beside him, Stiles let out a loud yawn, shaking his head before continuing his work on the cucumber. Derek frowned at him in concern. “You okay?”“Yeah, just tired.”“We should go to bed early tonight, make sure you get enough sleep.”Stiles turned to him, moving his eyebrows suggestively, “yeah, we could go to bed early.”“Early to sleep, Stiles.”“Well, tire me out first, then I’ll sleep great,” Stiles winked at him.“Stiles.”“Don’t worry about me, honey muffin, I’m fine.”--Sequel to Something Rotten





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> And here we go! Only an entire year after I posted the last chapter of Something Rotten. Here is your promised sequel.  
> Sorry guys, I really didn't think this would take me this long to write. But, life happened.
> 
> If there are any newcomers here, you're going to need to read Something Rotten first, otherwise you will have no idea what's happening. 
> 
> A few things I want to say before we dive in! 
> 
> 1) This takes place a year after the end of Something Rotten, so they are a bit settled in now. 
> 
> 2) If you loved Something Rotten, and don't want to change that ending for yourself, feel free to leave it at that. This is a story that jumps off of it, and I'm pretty proud of it, but it's up to you if you want a new ending!
> 
> 3) Due to spoilers, all warnings are going to be in the end notes of each chapter. I will update the tags after I post all chapters. 
> 
> 4) I will be posting updates every weekend until it's finished. I have most of it written now, I'm just editing as I post. It will all be uploaded sometime in July :)
> 
> 5) I have never been to Medford or Oregon, but that is where this story takes place. Just pretend this is a nice, made up town, somewhere on the West Coast. 
> 
> 6) This is not about the story, but I have had a few people asking me about a fic I used to have here: Best Laid Plans. Yes, I deleted that fic a few months ago, and it was one of the reasons this fic took me so long to write. I deleted it because I was getting comments I didn't like on a fic that was about a really sensitive topic to me (suicide). After I deleted it, I started working on it again. I've changed a lot, and made it a lot longer, but I'm not sure what to do with it now. Maybe I'll try to self publish it myself one day, who knows. But if anyone was wondering, that's what happened there :) Let me know if you have anymore questions. 
> 
> 7) The title, like the rest of the names in this series, comes from Shakespeare's Hamlet. 
> 
> That's all for now! Happy reading my fanfiction friends :) 
> 
> Warnings in the end notes.

Derek smiled in satisfaction as he took a step back from the newly painted wall. He personally wouldn’t have chosen this god awful shade of yellow, but it was Cora’s nursery, so it was Cora’s decision. He was just happy it was done. 

 

Putting the paint roller down, Derek brushed his hands off on his paint splattered jeans and stood up straight, crossing his arms and surveying the finished nursery with a smile. This was it, this was the last room in their new den that had to be finished. 

 

It had only taken him a year. 

 

He had spent two months on his and Stiles own home first. A small log cabin that sat snug against the woods north of the big house. Enough space for their bedroom, a living area, a kitchen, and a bath. They had most of their meals in the big house anyway, and Stiles had mostly wanted room to store his growing book collection, that was all. Derek was simply happy to now have a king size bed, even if it took up almost their entire bedroom. 

 

Next he had spent a month on Nana’s ‘magic hut’ (as Stiles called it). Her home was even smaller than theirs, but that was all she had asked for. Nana’s cottage didn’t even have a kitchen, but a large table in the center of the room, and cabinets wrapped around the sides, designed for a magical workshop. The wide smile that had spread across her face the first time she had stepped into her new home was enough to let Derek know he’d made it how she wanted it. 

 

Which had been a relief, because Derek had then moved on to spend the last  _ nine _ months working on the big house. First he’d had to add a new room for Isaac and Lisa, since the room they had been sleeping in had rotting wood in it’s far wall. Then he’d had to entirely remodel the kitchen so that it large enough to handle feeding a pack of wolves. Then he’d had to add on to the living room, for about the same reason, a normal sized living room was not big enough for a pack of werewolves who now spent every night together. 

 

And that had only been the first floor. 

 

For now, he was finally finished. The only building left on the property that Derek hasn’t touched is the old barn a few miles south. He could deal with that later. No one needed it for anything, and everyone was happy with what they had. 

 

And he was sure, for the first time since the fire, that everyone in his pack was happy. Happy and healthy. 

 

Finally. 

 

It had taken a long time, and a lot of patience, but after three months of living in their new den, Stiles had finally decided to seek out a therapist. The woman he chose was Derek’s new favorite person on the planet. There were times that Stiles came home in tears, or tense in the shoulders, especially in the beginning, but Derek knew it was really making a difference. Stiles was doing so much better now. His smiles came easier. He touched people more freely. He finally finished his high school classes online, and moved on to a few college courses. Along with working a part-time job, practicing magic with Nana, and helping Derek around the house. 

 

Derek couldn’t be more proud of the man he loved. 

 

Lisa and Isaac were both happier than Derek could remember them being. Lisa was a paramedic in town, but it was not nearly as busy as it had been in New York. She was rarely asked to stay late, and had only once unexpectedly had to cover someone else’s shift. With all of her free time, she was finally learning some basics from her Nana along with Stiles, or as much as a werewolf was able to learn. 

 

Isaac was now the manager of a bookstore in town. He loved the small town ‘vibes’ the customers had, and Derek was pretty sure the owner was grooming Isaac so he could take over the business entirely when she retired in a few years. Derek didn’t know if Isaac would be willing to take on that responsibility, but Derek knew he could do it if he chose too. He was proud of the boy he’d met in a graveyard all those years ago, he’d grown up to be a good man. 

 

As a couple Lisa and Isaac didn’t act much differently then when they were friends, though there was a lot more touching now. And kissing. And Isaac now spent hours talking about Lisa whenever she wasn’t around… Derek was willing to sit by and ignore him, as long as his friends were happy. 

 

Andy and Marco had opened their own restaurant in town, called Little Chile. It was supposed to be a dinner place, but had somehow turned into a breakfast/lunch cafe. Neither seemed to mind, as long as they got customers. Andy dealt with the management, the paperwork and everything, while Marco cooked the food. They hired a girl to help on the weekends, and Stiles went in every weekday for the lunchtime rush, but for the most part it was just the two of them working together in their own restaurant. They came home every day, bouncing new ideas off each other, and smiling like they’d won the lottery. 

 

Cora spends most of her time at home with Izzy, and is usually the one to make most of their meals, though everyone pitches in for dinner. Derek had a feeling that would soon come to an end, however, with the arrival of baby #2. Derek knew that Cora was getting restless, and had secretly been taking early childhood education lessons online. He wasn’t surprised Cora had asked him to remodel the barn so Cora could turn it into a daycare after the baby was born. It was the best way to keep her own kids close while also giving her something to do. 

 

She had had the idea when her neighboring packs had all complained about the childcare in the area when she’d asked advice for themselves. It would be there very own supernatural daycare.

 

Derek was hoping she would at least wait a few months before she expected him to be finished that… 

 

“Room is looking good, bro,” Cora said as she waddled into the room, one hand on her stomach, the other on her lower back. She was nearly seven months pregnant, but already rounder than she had been with Izzy. Derek was a bit worried there were two babies hiding in there. 

 

“You like the colour?” Derek asked, bending down to start clean up. Cora hummed happily behind him. 

 

“Yeah. I’m thinking of painting in some cute little animals. Add some baby softness, what do you think?” 

 

Derek snorted, “I think you should hire someone else to do that.” 

 

“Shut up! I took art in school.” 

 

“A lot of people take art in school, it’s an easy elective.” 

 

Cora swatted at his back, Derek snorted again, standing up to dance out of her reach. 

 

“No fair, you know I’m as slow as a turtle with this big thing,” Cora wrapped both of her hands over her stomach, patting it fondly. 

 

Derek rolled his eyes, “and you know that if I even poked you back, Marco would kill me.” 

 

Cora smirked, “yeah, I do know that.” 

 

Derek huffed, but went back to cleaning up the paint. He placed everything in a large bucket so he could take it out to his work shed later, after he cleaned the paint off of all his brushes. He finished pulling the last of the tape off the walls when he heard Cora awkwardly cleared her throat behind him. 

 

Derek sighed, “I’m not painting it again. You didn’t like the green, so I changed it to yellow, but that’s it. If you want a different colour, your mate can paint it.” 

 

“Um, rude, but not what I was going to say.” 

 

Derek turned to her, eyebrow raised, “okay, what is it? The baby okay?” 

 

“The baby’s fine.” 

 

“Is Izzy-” 

 

“The kids are fine, Derek, calm down, jeez… I’m just… How’s Stiles doing?” 

 

Derek’s shoulders slumped in relief. “Stiles is fine, Cora. He’s actually doing better than I’ve ever seen him.” 

 

“Are you sure?” Cora crossed her arms over her belly nervously, “he seems tired, lately.” 

 

Derek smiled, stepping up to run a hand over his sisters shoulders. “Stiles is fine, trust me. He’s been working hard on his courses, and all the jobs he keeps picking up, but he’s fine. I’ll make sure to get him to sleep more so you don’t have to worry.” 

 

“Okay, I just noticed him yawning a lot yesterday, and this morning he looked so tired before he went to work, and I just… I worry when-” 

 

“I know.” Derek reassured her, “in the last few months before Izzy, you forced all of us to update you on our whereabouts almost hourly. But we’re all fine here, I promise.” 

 

“Okay,” Cora patted his hand that rested on her shoulder, “okay. Thanks. I know I sound crazy sometimes.” 

 

“It’s fine. Now go head downstairs, we don’t want you to miss dinner.” 

 

Cora frowned, “it’s four in the afternoon, dinner’s not til- oh my god, are you saying I’m that slow like this? Derek, you dick!” 

 

“Dick!” Izzy shouted happily, running past the door, butt naked. “Uncle Derek’s a dick!” 

 

Derek threw his head back in laughter as Cora hurried after her toddler, throwing a glare behind her. “You’re a jerk,” she hissed at him, “Izzy, get back here! Where are your clothes?!” 

 

\-- 

 

Stiles new Jeep rolled down the driveway half an hour later. It was brown instead of blue, but Stiles said the ‘essence’ of the Jeep was the same. Derek still had no idea what that meant, but he figured it had something to do with the fact that this new Jeep was just as old as Stiles last one, if not older. 

 

One day he would get Stiles to ride a safer car… though even he was starting to doubt that it would be in this lifetime. 

 

“Hey Der-bear,” Stiles greeted him cheerfully, coming over to peck Derek on the cheek where he was sorting through his shed. “How’s the nursery? Did Cora really go for flaxen yellow?” 

 

“Yes. Don’t tell her how much you hate it though, I’m not painting it again.” 

 

Stiles face wrinkled in disgust, “it’s practically  _ brown _ .” 

 

“It’s  _ done _ .” 

 

Stiles waved a hand, “well it’s better than sacramento green. That kid would have grown up with nightmares.” 

 

Derek rolled his eyes, but finally finished putting everything away in the shed and walked out to greet his mate, pulling him in close and burying his nose in Stiles hair. 

 

“I was only gone for four hours,” Stiles said, even as he burrowed into Derek’s chest. Derek didn’t reply, rumbling happily as he held Stiles in his arms. They only broke apart a few minutes later because Charlie started worming his way between their legs. 

 

Stiles laughed, bending down to pick up the dog. “I know, buddy, we would never leave you out of cuddles for long, don’t worry.” 

 

Charlie let out an indignant huff, before licking Stiles’s nose and squirming to get down. Stiles dropped him on the ground and Charlie took off, probably to make sure his territory was safe after four long hours at the restaurant. 

 

“I still can’t believe Andy let’s you take Charlie to Little Chile.” 

 

“Uh, why not? Charlie is awesome, and everyone loves him. Now come use your big werewolf arms and carry in all the groceries for me.” 

 

\-- 

 

Two hours later, and the house was full of pack members bustling around getting dinner ready. Stiles was cutting up vegetables for a salad, Isaac was mashing potatoes, Lisa was cutting up the french bread, and Andy was pulling out a pie from the freezer to put in the oven as soon as Derek took out the pork roast. Marco and Nana had just finished setting up the table, and Marco was quickly moving to grab everyone a drink before Cora tried to do it herself. Instead Marco told her to keep an eye on the dog, who was eyeing the oven hopefully. They could all smell the roast cooking, and Derek was giving it two more minutes before pulling it out. Charlie was going to be greatly disappointed when he didn’t drop it on the floor. 

 

Beside him, Stiles let out a loud yawn, shaking his head before continuing his work on the cucumber. Derek frowned at him in concern. “You okay?” 

 

“Yeah, just tired.” 

 

“We should go to bed early tonight, make sure you get enough sleep.” 

 

Stiles turned to him, moving his eyebrows suggestively, “yeah, we could go to bed early.” 

 

“Early to  _ sleep _ , Stiles.” 

 

“Well, tire me out first, then I’ll sleep great,” Stiles winked at him. 

 

“Stiles.” 

 

“Don’t worry about me, honey muffin, I’m fine.” 

 

Derek looked him over. He did seem fine, other than being tired… when it was just the two of them, Derek would try to convince Stiles to take a day off from the restaurant to get some more rest. Maybe Wednesdays, no one went out for lunch on Wednesday. 

 

“Derek, seriously, I’m okay.” 

 

“Okay… don’t call me honey muffin.” 

 

Stiles grinned, “whatever you say, honey muffin.” 

 

Derek rolled his eyes, but he was smiling. Stiles really did seem to be fine, he had just let Cora get into his head. Derek turned to give his attention to the roast, pulling it out of the oven to give it time to rest before he had to cut it up to serve it. 

 

They all gathered around the table to eat, Marco at one end, Nana at the other. Everyone else gathered in between. Marco would have looked like a more intimidating head of the household if he didn’t spend most of the dinner trying to convince Izzy to eat her food with silly faces and voices. 

 

At the other end of the table, Nana, Lisa and Stiles were all laughing at a story Nana was telling, something about a bewitched elephant she had once come across in Africa. Derek watched his mate throw his head back in glee, ignoring all social cues and laughing wildly with his mouth full of food. He felt the little knot of worry inside of him fade away. 

 

Stiles was exactly how he should be.

 

\-- 

 

Stiles hummed happily into his boyfriend’s mouth, jumping to wrap his legs around Derek’s torso. He was glad when Derek got the hint and pushed him up against their door, wrapping his hands protectively around Stiles ass. Oh yes, Stiles loved to have those hands on him. 

 

“Bed,” he whispered between kisses. Derek didn’t move, pushing Stiles harder against the door. “Bed, now.” 

 

Derek moved back, carrying Stiles the few steps towards the bed. He didn’t drop him on it, instead slowly lowering Stiles down before turning so that Stiles was on top. Stiles pulled back a moment later, pushing his hands underneath Derek’s shirt and pulling it over his head. 

 

“God, your abs are amazing,” Stiles said leaning forward to kiss them. 

 

“Your lips are amazing,” Derek said, “can I take you shirt off?” 

 

“Yeah.” 

 

Derek gently pulled at the shirt as Stiles made his way up Derek’s body. When he reached Derek’s neck he pulled away, but only far enough for Derek to take his shirt off, then he moved back down to kiss Derek’s neck. 

 

Derek moaned under him. 

 

“What do you want to do tonight, baby? Want me to ride you?” 

 

“ _ Fuck _ , yes,” Derek moaned. Stiles heard a bang and then something clatter to the floor as Derek reached over in search for the lube. He didn’t stop what he was doing though until he felt Derek’s hands wrap around his waist again, a cool bottle pressed against his skin. “Is it okay if I help with the prep?” 

 

Stiles nodded, already working on shimmying out of his pants. He helped Derek pull his pants off before straddling Derek’s waist again. Derek was squirting the lube onto his fingers, rubbing them together to get it warm. What a gentleman.

 

“Ready?” 

 

“Yeah, big guy,” Stiles smiled down at him, leaning forward for a quick kiss his boyfriend as he felt Derek’s fingers circle his hole. He let Derek have his fun for another minute before he pulled back with a snort. “You can start any time now.” 

 

“I have started,” Derek smirked at him, “this is why your ass loves me.” 

 

Stiles started to roll his eyes, but closed them halfway through with a gasp when Derek finally pushed in. 

 

“Fuck.” 

 

When he opened his eyes Derek was still smirking at him, his finger ever so slowly working its way into Stiles hole. It took ages before he had the finger fully inside, another decade before he had two fingers in, scissoring slowly. 

 

“God, I love the way you moan when I work you open.” Derek said under him, “you look so beautiful like this.” 

 

Stiles felt his cheeks flush red, but he didn’t say anything as Derek continued to praise him. He had learned early on that Derek didn’t like being told he was lying… also, his therapist had told him Derek probably wasn’t lying. He actually thought Stiles was beautiful. 

 

And who was Stiles to tell him he was wrong? 

 

By the time Derek had three fingers buried in him, Stiles was a mess. His head rested on Derek shoulder as he panted against Derek’s skin, his fingers twitching in the sheets. His cock was so hard it ached where it sat, lying between their stomachs. 

 

“Jesus, Stiles, look at you. You’re amazing.” Stiles bit his lip to hold back a whimper as Derek pulled his fingers out. He heard the lube cap pop, and assumed Derek was adding more, but he was surprised to find a dick pressing against his entrance a second later instead of the fingers again. 

 

“Yellow.” 

 

Stiles said it without thinking, but as soon as he did Derek stopped. When Stiles lifted his head, Derek’s hands were spread to the sides and lowered, trying to look unthreatening. 

 

Like Stiles ever thought Derek was a threat. 

 

“Shit, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to ruin-” 

 

“Hey, hey, none of that. You’re not ruining anything.” Derek reassured him. “Can I touch you?” 

 

Stiles took a breath before nodding, “yeah.” 

 

Derek’s hands moved to sooth him, the one not covered in lube to rest on his cheek, while the other one moved to pet his leg. “What’s wrong, was I going to fast?” 

 

“No, you just usually tell me when you do something different. I was surprised.” 

 

“Okay, I’m sorry. I should have said I was switching. Do you want to stop?” 

 

Stiles thought about it for a second before he shook his head, “no, just give me a second.” He leaned forward and press his forehead against Derek’s closing his eyes and sharing his breath. He reminded himself that this was Derek, the love of his life, he was lying on. Not some strange man in a motel room. Derek had just spent minutes, if not half an hour, preparing him for this. Making sure he enjoyed this. He wasn’t just sticking it in to get himself off. Derek would never hurt him. Derek was his home, Derek was safe place. 

 

Derek was the best thing that had ever happened to him, and Stiles wanted to share everything with him. Even orgasms. 

 

_ Especially _ orgasms. 

 

A few seconds passed and Stiles felt his body calm, a few seconds more and Stiles was moving away with a smile. “Alright, get your dick in me.” 

 

“Are you sure?” 

 

“Yep,” Stiles sat up, watching as Derek lined himself up before sinking down onto him. “Oh fuck, yes.” 

 

“Can I move?” 

 

“Fuck yes, move!” Stiles started to bounce as Derek thrust up with his hips. Soon they found their rhythm, and Stiles was moaning with pleasure as Derek was grunting below him. 

 

“Fuck, Derek, touch me.” 

 

Derek moved quickly, wrapping his lubed up palm around Stiles dick and jerking him off to their rhythm. It didn’t take much longer before Stiles was coming, painting Derek’s chest with his cum. 

 

“You okay, baby?” Derek asked breathlessly. 

 

“Fuck yes, I want you to come inside me.” Stiles answered, squeezing around Derek’s cock, causing Derek to let our a loud groan. Derek’s entire head rolled back when Stiles moved forward to flick at one of his nipples. It wasn’t long after that before Derek’s hips stuttered and Stiles felt him still inside of him. 

 

They stayed like that for a long moment fore Stiles gently pulled off and rolled to the side, chuckling when he felt Derek’s come start to pool out of him. 

 

“That was amazing!” Stiles said, grinning over at Derek when all the man did was grunt in response. “You don’t agree?” 

 

Derek opened one eye to glare at him. It was not super effective. “Of course I do, everytime with you it’s amazing.” 

 

“Because I’m amazing?” 

 

“Sure.” 

 

Stiles grinned, knocking a fist into Derek’s side. “You were just saying I was amazing.” 

 

“Yeah but if I say it too much, your head might explode.” Derek shut his eyes, ignoring Stiles indignant sounds. 

 

Charlie barked at the door before he could think of a suitable come back. 

 

“Do you think he was listening?” Stiles asked, scrunching his nose as he looked at the door. 

 

“Yes.” 

 

“Ew. Go lay down, Charlie, I’ll let you in in a minute!” He turned to Derek, who was still lying beside him with his eyes closed. “Shower with me?” 

 

In answer, Derek stood up, grabbing Stiles and throwing him over his shoulder for the few steps it took to get to their washroom. 

 

Stiles laughed the whole way.

 

— 

 

“All squeaky clean!” Stiles said, sliding into his pajama bottoms. Derek snorted beside him as he did the same thing. 

 

Stiles ignored him.

 

“Okay, Charlie, here you go,” Stiles opened the door, stooping down to pick up the little dog as Charlie immediately came tumbling into the room. “I know, I know, you feel so left out! But trust me, you would rather stay outside for what we were doing. Yes you would, oh yes you would!” Stiles scratched as his belly as Charlie wiggled in his arms. 

 

“I think you talk more baby talk to him now than you did when you first got him.” Derek said, looking extremely unimpressed as he climbed into the bed. 

 

“How would you know?” 

 

Derek rolled his eyes, petting Charlie gently himself when he came trotting over to greet Derek too. 

 

“Fine, since I met Charlie, you’re doing more now.” 

 

“Charlie likes it,” Stiles said, bouncing onto the bed behind the dog. “Don’t you Sir Charles? Oh yes you do, oh yes you do!” 

 

Charlie wiggled like a madman, rolling onto his back to get belly rubs. Stiles snickered with glee as he gave them. 

 

“Okay, now cut it out. We need him to calm down if we want to sleep in the next hour.” 

 

Stiles stilled, watching Derek slump against his pillows and shut his eyes. He glanced at the clock and saw it was 11:30… he could stay up another hour or two without looking suspicious. 

 

“Actually, I have a paper to write. So I’ll take Charlie and-“ 

 

An arm was thrown over him, pushing him into the bed before he could finish the sentence. 

 

“You need to sleep, Stiles.” 

 

Stiles glared at his boyfriend, but Derek’s eyes were closed. Stiles chose to believe he could feel the glare anyway. 

 

“I have a-“ 

 

“That’s not due for three days.” 

 

Stiles huffed, “how do you know?” 

 

“Because I listen when you talk.” Derek sat up, pulling the covers up over all three of them. Stiles hated how cozy it was. 

 

“But-“ 

 

“Sleep.” 

 

“Fine!” 

 

Derek switched the light off, and tossed an arm over Stiles once more. Probably to make sure he stayed in the bed.

 

“Good night. I love you.” 

 

Stiles felt a pang of guilt at the words. Derek was only ever trying to help him… even if sleep was the last thing that would help Stiles right now. 

 

“I love you, too.” He whispered back, curling up into the bed. 

 

He would just slip out after Derek fell asleep. 

 

—

 

Stiles opened his eyes and groaned. Despite his best efforts, he had fallen asleep. Probably before Derek even, since he didn’t remember him falling asleep and giving Stiles the chance to slip out of bed. 

 

Now he was here, in this great big, empty, stupid, nothingness. 

 

Again. 

 

Stiles ran a hand through his hair and grimaced, looking around at all the… nothing. That was the only way he could describe it. Everywhere he looked, it was just white. There was no shape, no sound, no dimension to the blankness. He wasn’t even sure if he was standing right now or if he was hovering here, in a strange, white, void. 

 

“Stiles,” a voice called behind him. He turned his head slightly and was suddenly facing her, the girl who he always saw in these dreams. 

 

Allison.

 

She looked the same as she always did. Dressed in the outfit she died in, including the knives strapped to her ankles. There was no stab wound through her shirt though. No sign of decay on her skin. Her face turned just as rosy as it did before. She smiled just as bright. 

 

Stiles was sure his smile back looked exhausted. 

 

“I’m glad you’re back,” Allison said, like Stiles hadn’t been here in his dreams every night for the past two weeks. “Have you had a chance to talk to Scott? To contact my dad?” 

 

Stiles sighed, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. She asked the same thing everytime, and he was starting to run out of answers. “Yeah, they’re… they’re both fine. Nothing new since yesterday.” 

 

Allison’s smile faltered a bit, and Stiles felt a pang of guilt. He would ask about his dad, too, if he was stuck here. 

 

“Your dad is still in France, Isaac talks to him a lot. They’re, like, super tight now, it’s weird. And, uh, Scott’s still doing his alpha thing in Beacon Hills. Sounds like it’s working out better, this time.” 

 

“Scott’s always been a great alpha.” Allison defended, like she always did. Stiles nodded along, he didn’t need to tell her all about the rift between him and Scott. She remembered him a certain way, and Stiles wasn’t about to ruin that for her. She knew he didn’t live in Beacon Hills anymore though, and he was wondering how long it would take her to ask him why he had moved. She probably thought it was for school. 

 

Stiles hoped he figured out how to stop these dreams before that happened. It wasn’t that he didn’t love seeing Allison again, it was mostly the people that showed up after her he didn’t like. 

Well, that and it was getting increasingly awkward talking to Allison every night. 

 

“How are you? How are things here?” 

 

Allison shrugged, “the same. It’s hard to keep track of time here, even with your visits the time seems to change. It feels like forever since I saw you last, I missed you.” Allison smiled at him so Stiles smiled back. The girl was even sweet in the after life. “I saw my mom since the last time you were here though, that was nice.” 

 

“Can’t you stay with her? You must miss her.” He knew he would stay with his mom, if he could. But Allison shook her head. 

 

“No, she’s… she’s on the other side. She just comes to visit me.”

 

Stiles frowned, “can’t you go to the other side?” 

 

“No, not yet. I’m always just here, waiting.” Allison looked around at the blank whiteness for a moment, before turning back to Stiles with a bright smile. “But it’s okay, you guys will figure out how to get me out soon, now that you know where I am. This will all be worth it when I’m back with the living, my mom understands.” 

 

Stiles blinked in surprise, this was the first time she’s mentioned  _ this _ plan. Is that why she always asked about her dad and Scott? She thought they were finding a way to get her out of here? 

 

How the fuck was he supposed to tell her there was no way to get her out of here? She was dead. Her body was gone. This was the afterlife. The only way out of limbo was through, to her moms side. 

 

“Allison…” Stiles started, but he was too late, he’d missed his chance. One moment she was there, the next she was gone, white nothingness in her place. Stiles sighed heavily. At least this gave him time to figure out what to say to her. 

 

What did you say to someone who wanted you to bring them back to life? 

 

Sorry, no, I’m not even going to try? I researched everything there is to possibly know about death and heaven and hell and limbo and beyond when my own mother died, and there is no way to bring you back? 

 

Or - sorry, no, you’re probably not even real and are very likely a figment of my fucked up imagination? 

 

Stiles winced, digging the heels of his hands into his eye sockets. 

He could do better than that. 

 

“Well, well, well, aren’t you a sight for sore eyes.” 

 

Stiles dropped his hands instantly, his shoulders tensing for a fight. There was always a fight when Theo was involved. 

 

“Nice of you to come visit me, Stiles,” Theo said, reaching a hand out to stroke his fingers down Stiles face. Stiles flinched back in disgust. 

 

“I didn’t come to see you, you can rot here for all I care.” 

 

Theo tsked, “is that a way to talk to your lover?” 

 

“Fuck you.”

 

“I’d rather fuck  _ you _ ,” Theo wiggled his eyebrows, and Stiles felt sick to his stomach. He hated this man, hated him to the core of his being. Even dead, he could still taunt him, could still make him feel pathetic and weak. 

 

Stiles needed to wake up and get the hell away from him. 

 

“Come on, Stiles,” Theo was close again, too close. His hands were on his shoulders, and he was trying to push him down. “Get on your knees for me, for old times sake.” 

 

Stiles pushed out, forcing Theo away with all the strength he could gather. Thankfully, real world rules didn’t apply here, so it was a fair amount of strength. The werecoyote went flying backward, and didn’t stop for a good twenty feet. 

 

Stiles would have been much happier about this if Theo didn’t immediately straighten up and glare at him. 

 

“Come on Stiles, don’t be like that,” Theo said before rushing at him. 

 

\--

 

Stiles woke up with a gasp, his arm thrown up to block Theo’s attack. It took him a few seconds to realize Theo wasn’t attacking him anymore, Theo wasn’t here. He was at home, in the bed he shared with Derek and Charlie. He was safe. 

 

For now. 

 

Stiles flopped back onto the pillow, rubbing his hands over his face. He reached up and started petting Charlie instead when the dog came over, whining and licking at Stiles cheeks. He didn’t know how much sleep he had gotten, but it didn’t matter. He couldn’t go back to sleep now. 

 

After a few deep breaths, Stiles dropped his hands and looked around. Charlie was curled up against Stiles side, looking up at Stiles with wide worried eyes. Stiles gave his head a rub. 

 

Derek was still asleep beside him, but he was frowning, and his hand was reaching out across the bed. Stiles was pretty sure he was only a few heartbeats away from waking up to see what was going on, so Stiles gingerly rolled over and ran a hand through his hair, helping him drift back to sleep before he woke up and asked a bunch of questions Stiles was unwilling to answer. It didn’t take long before the crease between his eyebrows was gone, and Derek was turning onto his back again. Stiles knew he would be snoring again in no time. 

 

Glancing at the clock, Stiles saw it was a little after 5 am. Early, but not ridiculously so. He’d gotten over four hours of sleep in, which was enough to keep him going for the day. 

 

Lifting Charlie up, Stiles quietly made his way off the bed and out of the room. If Derek asked, he would say he woke up around six and took Charlie out for a walk. 5:15 was around six, right? It was practically the truth. 

 

He stuffed his feet into sneakers and grabbed a hoodie before opening the door and letting Charlie out. The little dog wiggled happily as they set out on their familiar walk around the property. 

 

“A morning walk will do us good, right Sir Charles? Everything will feel fine when we get back.” 

 

Charlie looked up at him, cocked his head, and then went off to find a bush to pee on. Stiles bit his lip and walked on. 

 

Everything would be fine. Maybe if he thought it enough times, he would start believing it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: There is a sex scene in this chapter. It is consensual, but there is discussion of safe-words. Derek and Stiles use green/yellow/red for how they're feeling during sex. 
> 
> Stiles talks to Allison while he is asleep. She is not alive.  
> He also runs into Theo while he is asleep. He is also not alive, and Theo is still the worst. 
> 
> \-- end of spoilers.
> 
> Thanks for reading! Leave a comment/kudos to let me know what you think :)
> 
> Or [come say hi on tumblr!](http://happyjuicyfruit.tumblr.com/)


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now that I have this worked out a bit more, I should be posting every Saturday and Wednesday :)  
> I still don't know how many chapters this is yet though, so we'll see how that goes haha. 
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
>  
> 
> Warnings: sex scene, similar to last chapter but this time it's blow jobs.  
> References to Stiles going to therapy/mental health issues/trouble sleeping

Derek laid out the large sheet of paper carefully.  The plans for converting the barn into a daycare were more complicated than he initially thought they would be, and he didn’t want to ruin them with any coffee stains. 

 

Not that Stiles was currently around to spill any coffee. 

 

Looking over at the clock, Derek’s gut twisted in worry. Stiles had been gone when he woke up at 6:30, the sheets on his side of the bed cold. Charlie was gone, as were Stiles favorite sneakers, so it wasn’t too hard of a leap to guess where they had gone but that had been an hour ago. 

 

Stiles never took Charlie out on morning walks that lasted an  _ hour _ . 

 

Derek crossed his arms and cocked his head, listening to the woods around their cottage. He didn’t hear Stiles usual stumbling gait, but he did hear the pitter patter of tiny paws on grass, and soon after the rabbiting heartbeat of a small dog, followed shortly by the rabbiting heartbeat of his mate. 

 

Derek dropped his arms in relief. Stiles was on his way back. 

 

He turned and grabbed the kettle. He had waited to start breakfast until Stiles got back, not expecting it to be an hour. He was too hungry now to see what Stiles might want. The idiot could be happy with breakfast burrito Derek was planning on making for him. 

 

By the time Stiles came stumbling into their home, Charlie happily at his heels, Derek had veggies and eggs cooking on a pan, the wraps prepped and ready, spread out on two plates beside him. 

 

“Hey, you,” Stiles said, toeing off his shoes and almost falling over in the process. “You’re up early.” 

 

“I could say the same to you,” Derek said, pushing the eggs around as he gave Stiles an assessing look. The man looked tired, with deep bags under his eyes against pale skin. He practically slumped into the chair at the table. “When did you get up?” 

 

Stiles shrugged, “took Charlie out around 6.” 

 

That… didn’t sound like a lie. Derek didn’t feel like it was true though. 

 

He dumped the food out on the plates, carrying them over to the table to carefully set them down around the blueprints. Charlie whined when he didn’t get a plate of his own. Derek ignored him, “Did you have trouble sleeping?” 

 

“I’m worried about school. No big deal.” Stiles was already grabbing at the food, and he wasn’t looking at Derek. And for some reason, Derek didn’t feel like that was entirely the truth either. 

 

Derek felt his gut twist again. Maybe Cora had been right. Maybe something was going on with Stiles, something he wasn’t telling Derek about. After all, Stiles didn’t usually look this tired. 

 

Derek didn’t want to consider it, but… the last time he had seen Stiles like this had been when he was using, and that meant- 

 

Derek shook the thought away. Stiles wasn’t using, all the wolves would have smelled it by now if he had been taking any drugs around them. Derek was being paranoid, Stiles was allowed to be tired. 

 

“You could head back to bed after breakfast if you want, start fresh on your school work in the afternoon.” 

 

Stiles waved him off, “I’m fine. I’d rather check on this rad barn thing you’ve got going on here.” Stiles shoved his empty plate away, reaching for Derek’s plans. 

 

Derek jerked them away just in time, despite the fact that his wolf was practically preening inside because his mate liked his work. 

 

“Wash your hands first.” 

 

Stiles rolled his eyes but complied, hurrying back and making grabby hands for the plans. Derek slid them over. 

 

“This is so cool! I like the idea of the upper section being Cora’s office, that’s smart. Hey, do you think you could build a little nook here?” Stiles pointed at the area of the barn that Derek had assumed once housed a horse, it was a small space that jutted out from the main barn area, and Derek had planned to tear the whole thing away and put in a bay window. “You could make this like a sleepy time, or quiet time nook. I read those are supper in right now with the little kids.” 

 

Derek smiled, leaning over to think about Stiles idea. He didn’t forget about the dark shadows underneath Stiles' eyes, but he pushed them to the back of his mind for now. 

 

Stiles would probably be fine by tomorrow anyway, he just needed a good night's sleep. 

 

\-- 

 

The days passed peacefully, like they always did ever since they moved to Oregon. 

 

Stiles spent a day with Derek, helping him finalize the plans for the barn, and then helping him buy all the extra supplies they would need. Derek appreciated it. Mostly because Stiles did all of the talking, since he knew how much Derek hated talking to the people at Home Depot. 

 

On Saturday they both went to Marco and Andy’s cafe to help out, like they did whenever there was a weekend rush. Little Chile was getting to be one of the most popular lunch places in town, much to the pack’s delight. Marco wasn’t one to brag, but Andy was. Derek just rolled his eyes and helped out when they needed it. 

 

He was starting to think that they should hire more staff though. He wasn’t giving up his weekend  _ every _ weekend. 

 

Stiles didn’t mind at all. He worked at the cafe four to five times a week, and was a favorite of the customers. He knew how to charm the old ladies, and flatter the middle aged men. The teenagers thought he was cool, and the kids thought his jokes were ‘the best’.  And those who didn’t like him were bound to  _ love _ the little dog that followed him around, happily accepting pets from anyone who asked, and secret scraps of food when kids thought the adults weren’t watching. 

 

The pack just shook their heads fondly when Stiles walked away with his pockets full of tips. 

 

This Saturday, however, Stiles wasn’t joking around with anyone. He was taking orders with tight smiles and polite conversation. He was doing his job, but without the flare he usually had. Derek didn’t miss the concerned looks being shot his way by almost every table he waited on. Derek himself has been asked by three separate groups if Stiles was okay. He told them all he was just tired, he would be back to his old self by Monday. 

 

Derek was starting to doubt that though. 

 

As were Andy, Marco and Isaac, who all gave Derek pointed looks and told him to take Stiles home early. Something Derek was sure Stiles would argue, but he didn’t. He shrugged and then went to grab his hoodie. 

 

Derek was seriously getting concerned. 

 

Derek waited until he had Stiles and Charlie in his truck, halfway home, before he brought it up. 

 

“Are you okay?” He asked, never one to beat around the bush. Stiles didn’t really react to the question, which only set off more alarm bells in Derek’s head. 

 

“I’m fine.” 

 

_ Lie _ . 

 

“What’s wrong?” 

 

Stiles sighed, “nothing, I’m fine.” 

 

“Stiles, we both know I can hear when you lie. Tell me what’s wrong.” 

 

Stiles let out a breath of frustration. He tried to cross his arms, but couldn’t keep them there for long when Charlie whined in protest at the action. 

 

It was hard to take someone seriously when they caved to a tiny dog on a regular basis. 

 

“I’m having trouble sleeping.” Stiles finally said a few minutes later, his eyes glued to the window. 

 

Derek frowned in concern. “Nightmares?” He didn’t remember Stiles waking up from a nightmare recently but… he hadn’t really seen Stiles sleeping in the past few days. “Are you not sleeping at all?” 

 

“I sleep it’s just… it’s fine, I’ll be fine.” 

 

They drove in silence for a few more minutes, until Derek pulled into his spot beside Stiles’s Jeep. He turned to the man before he could get out of the truck, “do you want to see Dr. Patel?” 

 

“I don’t need to see a therapist every time I have trouble sleeping.” Stiles scoffed. 

 

Derek rolled his eyes, he had thought they’d gotten passed this. “There’s nothing wrong with seeing a therapist, Stiles, for any reason. You know that.” Stiles huffed, but Derek continued on anyway. “She really helped you, in those six months you were seeing her. You agreed when you stopped going regularly that you would still go in for check ups every few months, and your last one of those was about a month ago.” Derek shrugged, “It might help.” 

 

Stiles bit his lip, his eyes not leaving the dog in his lap. Derek knew Stiles hated it when they talked about his therapy, or anything from Stiles past. Stiles liked to pretend that everything was fine now, and they were all happy living out in the Oregon woods. 

 

Derek knew the past stayed with you though, no matter how much you healed. 

 

“How about this, you have a session with Dr. Patel next week, after the full moon on Wednesday night, and then we’ll head down to Beacon Hills for a bit.” 

 

Stiles perked up at the plan, his eyes meeting Derek’s for the first time. “Really?” 

 

Derek raised a brow, “no, I’m lying to you to get what I want. Yes of course, really. We haven’t seen your dad since he came up here last month, and it’ll do us good to get away for a bit.” He opened his door and exited the truck, giving Stiles a chance to think about it without Derek staring at him. 

 

By the time he rounded the truck though, Stiles was already there, staring up at Derek happily. 

 

“Okay, I’ll go see Dr. Patel and then we’ll spend the weekend with my dad.” He pecked Derek on the cheek before grinning broadly and practically skipping to the cottage. “Who knew you came up with such great plans on your own, Sourwolf? Or was this Cora’s idea?” 

 

“Shut up.” Derek said, but he was smiling as he followed his mate inside. He should have known all Stiles needed was to go see his dad. He was so relieved he didn’t even notice that Stiles was already out of his hoodie and his shirt by the time Derek stepped inside and closed the door behind him. 

 

He did notice when a pair of jeans were being thrown at his face. 

 

“Last one in the shower is a rotten egg!” 

 

Derek laughed, dropping the jeans and chasing after his naked mate. 

 

He caught up with him as he was stepping under the spray. Derek threw his own clothes into a pile on the floor, stepping into the shower behind him, wrapping his arms around his waist. 

 

“Mmm, hey big guy,” Stiles said, bumping his ass against Derek’s growing erection. “Happy to be in here with me?” 

 

“I’m happy to be anywhere with you.” 

 

“Sap. Here, wash my hair while I go down on you.” 

 

Derek hesitated as Stiles thrust the bottle of shampoo in his hand. “Colour?” 

 

“All green, sweetcheeks,” Stiles smiled, already falling to his knees. He waited for Derek to squirt some shampoo into his palm and lather it into his hair before he grabbed Derek’s cock and started working him to hardness. Derek lathered Stiles hair as Stiles licked at the tip of his cock and stroked him the way he knew Derek liked it. 

 

Only a minute later, he was taking Derek’s entire length into his mouth. 

 

“ _ Fuck _ .” 

 

Stiles hummed around him. 

 

“You’re amazing,” Derek said gently cupping his hands around Stiles head, “you look so beautiful, in the shower with me. I love you so-” he broke into a moan with Stiles pulled back with a wicked flick of his tongue. Derek couldn’t form sentences anymore, just poured all his love into running his hands through Stiles hair as he got the best head of his life. 

 

Though, it was always the best head of his life when he was with Stiles. 

 

He didn’t last long. He pulled Stiles up before he came, kissing him soundly as he pulled on his cock a few more times, coming with a moan against Stiles naked legs. Stiles grinned happily when they pulled apart. He always looked pleased with himself when he made Derek come exceptionally fast. 

 

Which meant he often went around looking quite pleased with himself. 

 

Derek pushed him back, tilting his head back to get the shampoo out. 

 

“My turn,” Stiles said, already grabbing the shampoo. Derek huffed, but he gladly got to his knees before his mate. Nosing at the man’s cock before mouthing at his balls. Stiles leaned against the wall, his eyes on Derek the whole time. 

 

Derek’s hair was fairly short, but Stiles managed to get his fingers through it. He stroked his fingers down Derek’s neck and behind his ears as Derek made his way up and down Stiles shaft. 

 

He actually found he quite enjoyed it. 

 

Stiles lasted longer, but not by much. He pulled Derek back before he came, but Derek kept his hand on him the whole time, working Stiles through his orgasm and supporting him when his knees almost gave out afterwards. 

 

“Fuck, you’re good with that tongue.” 

 

Derek laughed, pulling Stiles in for a kiss to show him just how nice his tongue could be. He pulled back to rinse off his hand. “Colour?” 

 

“Green.” Stiles smiled at him. “Soap me up?” 

 

“Sure,” Derek said, grabbing the bottle and loofah, running the suds over Stiles chest and arms. He worked his way over his shoulders and down his back, kissing his neck before bending down and washing his legs, making sure he got all of Derek’s spunk off of him. 

 

“Look at you,” Stiles said softly, “I think you like this part better than the sex bit.” 

 

Derek stood up straight again, pushing Stiles back under the spray and running his hands over Stiles body again to help wash them away. 

 

“I like looking after you, babe.” Derek said, and it was true. He would give up sex for the rest of his life if it meant he could look after Stiles. Have intimate moments with Stiles. “Sex is just a perk.” 

 

Stiles laughed, but his eyes glowed at Derek’s words. Stiles was still self-conscious about their sexual relationship sometimes. No matter what Derek said.

 

Derek knew it was because it didn’t stem from his relationship with Derek, but from his past life on the streets. The life where he used his body to survive. Derek hated to think about it, but he knew it was a part of Stiles now. Always would be. 

 

That’s why he cherished Stiles body whenever he had the chance. 

 

“Want me to help clean you off?” Stiles asked, grabbing for the body wash. 

 

“If you want to.” 

 

“Like I would ever give up a chance to run my hands over this chest? Yeah right,” Stiles said, lathering up Derek’s chest, paying extra attention to his chest hair. “I love these hairs,” Stiles hummed twisting a few between his fingers, “I’m so glad you’ve let them grow out.”

 

Derek didn’t say anything. Just let Stiles pepper his body with kisses as he scrubbed him down. 

 

Stiles wasn’t the only one with issues, after all. Kate hadn’t liked his chest hair, and told him it made him look weird. That was why he’d shaved it for so long, before he realized that wasn’t helping him at all and he stopped. 

 

Stiles knew this. That was also why he didn’t spend much time touching his abs, and moved on quickly to his hips. Kate focused on his stomach more than any other part of him. 

 

It was nice to have someone who understood that. Someone other than his therapist back in New York, of course. 

 

He smiled as Stiles rinsed him off, smiled as Stiles kissed him as he shut off the water. 

 

He was still smiling, hours later when they crawled into bed that night, as he held Stiles in his arms and he drifted off to sleep.

 

\-- 

 

Stiles leaned against the counter, watching Andy make a pathetic attempt at flirting when Jenny, their meat supplier gal. 

 

The fact that it was working was the only astonishing thing about it. 

 

“That is disgusting,” Sandy, their newly hired employee and Jenny’s eighteen year old daughter, said beside him. 

 

“I agree.” 

 

“Leave them alone,” Isaac said, counting out the bills beside Stiles elbow, “I think it’s great. Andy’s been alone for a long time.” 

 

Sandy made a gagging sound when Jenny let out an extremely exaggerated laugh and grabbed Andy’s arm. Andy repeated the already terrible joke again, just to see her fake laugh some more. 

 

“My mom too, but I don’t have to  _ see _ it.” Sandy said. 

 

“Nobody needs to see that.” Stiles muttered before stifling a yawn. 

 

“You know they can hear you, right?” Isaac said, “Andy’s a werewolf, and Jenny’s a werecoyote. They can hear us from ten feet away.” 

 

“Like they’re listening to us right now,” Stiles said, before turning away from the lovebirds and heading to the back to help Marco finish the clean up. Charlie followed after him, whining pitifully when he noticed Marco packing leftover food into tupperware to bring home with them. 

 

“You’re going to get fat, Chuck,” Stiles scolded the dog. He was ignored. 

 

“Ah Stiles, I’m just about finished in here. How’s Isaac doing?” 

 

“Almost done with the money.” 

 

“Great. Then we can head out soon.” Marco checked his watch, “we’ll be home by 4, Cora will be happy.” 

 

Stiles snorted, he opened his mouth to tease the giant teddy bear but instead had to twist his head to yawn against his shoulder. He turned back to see Marco looking at him with a concerned but serious expression. 

 

Oh, no. 

 

“Stiles, I have been meaning to speak with you.” Marco put down his containers, giving Stiles his whole attention. Crap. “You’ve been very tired this past week, we have all noticed. Is everything alright?” 

 

“I’m fine-” Stiles tried to say, but cut himself off with a yawn. Damnit. 

 

“Yeah, we would believe that if you hadn’t yawned through it,” Isaac drawled behind him, standing in the doorway with his envelope of counted cash. Stiles glared at him. 

 

“I’m fine, seriously. I’m just having some trouble sleeping.” 

 

Marco and Isaac exchanged a look. Andy walked in halfway through, his eyes flipping between the three of them before landing on Stiles, his eyebrows raised. 

 

“Everything okay in here?” 

 

“Yes!” Stiles said flailing an arm out. 

 

Isaac and Marco did not look impressed. “Stiles is having trouble sleeping.” Marco said. 

 

“Oh. Nightmares?” Andy asked. 

 

“No, not really-” 

 

“Not really? Is it, like, flashbacks? I’ve had those, they suck.” Isaac said. 

 

“Perhaps you should try chamomile tea, it helps calm the mind,” Marco said. 

 

“Have you been meditating with Nana? I thought that was supposed to help clear your head,” Andy said. 

 

“I find it helps to listen to music while you sleep. Keeps your brain from remembering anything,” Isaac chimed in. 

 

“Okay, stop!” Stiles held both his hands up. All three of them kept talking over each other for another second before they noticed. “I’m fine. I have an appointment with Dr. Patel tomorrow, and then we’re going to visit my dad for the weekend. We’re going to have a nice, relaxing, weekend, and I’ll be fine. Okay? Nothing to worry about.” 

 

They all stared at him for a moment longer, then Marco nodded and clapped a hand on his shoulder. “Good. A break will do you well. And family is very important.” 

 

Stiles smiled back, “yeah.”

 

“You let me know if it gets worse?” 

 

“I will, Alpha Marco,” Stiles teased. “I’ll be fine though, don’t worry about me.”

 

“I worry about all my packmates.” Marco said. Stiles patted his chest. 

 

“I know you do, buddy.” 

 

“Sooo, worry averted for now?” Andy asked. 

 

“Yes, no worrying for now.” 

 

“Good. Cause I asked Jenny on a date for this weekend, and she said yes!” 

 

Isaac cheered, grabbing Andy in a headlock and rubbing his hair. “Atta boy Andy!” 

 

“Hey!” 

 

“This is great! Does Andy like dancing? Lisa loves dancing, and she is also super great at dancing, maybe we could all go dancing together, now that you won’t be a sad third wheel? It can be like, quadruple date!” 

 

Andy pulled his head free, shoving Isaac away. “Let me have a first date before I scare her away with the whole pack.” 

 

“Why? Our pack is great. And Lisa is great at double dates, she’ll make Jenny feel super welcome. Did you know Lisa once…” 

 

Stiles tuned out whatever Lisa once did, shaking his head fondly at his family. Isaac was talking about Lisa nonstop these days, and he had a feeling Andy would be doing the same with Jenny soon too. 

 

He followed his pack mates out, waving at Isaac and Andy as they climbed in Andy’s toyota to head to the bank, and climbing into his old Jeep with Marco. The Alpha piled high with leftover for tonight’s dinner. 

 

\-- 

 

Derek breathed in the crisp night air. It was mid March, and although spring was technically not far off, the nights here would feel cool for a few months yet. 

 

He didn’t mind - he liked the cool night wind against his face during their full moon runs. 

 

Cracking his neck, Derek shifted into his beta form. Beside him, Lisa and Isaac did the same. The three of them chased after Marco, their alpha, as he began his sprint into the tree line, letting out a howl that cut through the silence. That the rest of them howled back - including the humans sitting at the edge of the trees. 

 

“Have a good run!” Derek heard Stiles yell after them. Derek grinned, his mate was sweet when he wanted to be. 

 

Derek focused on the trees ahead of him, dodging branches and leaping over logs. He nipped at Isaac when the wolf got close, and laughed as Lisa came close and nipped back. After playing around with the two of them for a while, Derek decided to loop around and head back. He passed by Marco and Andy, who were wrestling in a small clearing, and kept going until he was almost back to their home. 

 

Right at the edge of the treeline were Cora and Izzy, both in beta shift, playfully tugging a stuffed animal between them. Derek ran forward and swooped in, picking Izzy up with ease and throwing her over his shoulder. 

 

“Uncle Derek!” Izzy cried out, laughing as he spun in a circle. “Put me down!” 

 

Derek did no such thing. 

 

“How are the others?” Cora asked, dropping the toy and leaning against a tree. 

 

“Good, playing.” Derek moved Izzy around until he was only holding her by her foot. She laughed almost as much as she wiggled. “How’s it going here? You been good for your mom, Iz?” 

 

“Yes!” 

 

“Hmm, maybe I should put you down then.” 

 

“Yes!” 

 

“Should I drop you on your head?”

 

“Nooo!”

 

“Should I throw you up in the air, catch you, and then put you down gently?” 

 

“Yes, please!” 

 

Smiling, Derek did just that. Throwing his niece in the air and catching her around her middle, putting her safely back down on the earth. She giggled and took off, running towards the light of the campfire. 

 

“Want to go see what the humans are doing?” He asked Cora. 

 

She shrugged, “don’t have much choice now.” 

 

The two of them walked into the clearing, spotting Charlie and Izzy rolling around and snarling at each other immediately. It was obvious the two of them were playing, but Cora kept watching them just in case. Derek went up to wrap his arms around Stiles. 

 

“How’s it going?” Derek asked, pressing a kiss above Stiles ear. Stiles reached back and patted Derek’s forehead, obviously distracted. 

 

“Good, we’re working on elements. I started this fire with my mind!” 

 

“No way?” 

 

“Yes way!” 

 

“It took him long enough,” Nana said, wrapped up in blankets beside them. “I was getting cold out here.” 

 

“Sorry, Lucinda, we don’t all have the elemental gift that you do.” Stiles said, before leaning back against Derek more. “It was getting pretty cold though. And I feel like I may have fucked this up, it isn’t really giving off heat.” 

 

“Let me warm you then,” Derek said, lifting Stiles up with ease and positioning himself under him. Stiles squaked, but curled up in Derek’s lap happily. The two of them were soon covered with a blanket, and Stiles was humming with content. 

 

“Wolf cuddles.” 

 

Nana snapped her fingers beside them and the fire flickered, and then gave off a burst of heat. It died down afterwards, and started to feel like a normal fire. Derek snorted when Stiles shot her a glare. 

 

“Sorry, hun, we’ll practice another element later. I don’t think fires your forte.” 

 

Stiles grumbled, tucking his head under Derek’s chin. 

 

“That’s okay, I don’t like fire much anyway.” Derek said. 

 

“True. Fires stupid.” 

 

Derek laughed, “yeah. You’re way cooler than fire.” 

 

“Exactly.” 

 

Derek grinned. He didn’t say anything when Stiles drifted off to sleep in his arms. Neither did Lucinda or Cora, who both sat in comfortable silence, watching the fire, and the pups playing. 

 

Derek leaned back with a smile, content to have his sleeping mate in his arms. 

 

\--

 

Stiles opened his eyes to find the room lit with late morning sun. The clatter of dishes in the kitchen and the smell of coffee wafting into the room let him know Derek was already up and about. He glanced at the clock to see it was 10:30. 

 

He’d slept for a solid 10 hours. 

 

Stiles smiled, stretching in the sheets to crack his back. The dreams weren’t gone, but Stiles was finally feeling like he was getting a handle on them. Less fucked up fights with Theo, more calm chats with Allison, Erica and Boyd. 

 

He had gone to see his therapist yesterday, and apparently that had done a world of wonders for him. He thought that maybe Dr. Patel was right. These dreams were his brains strange way of dealing with all the death he’s dealt with in his life. Now that he’s safe, settled, hasn’t had a crisis in a year… maybe his brain is finally processing things it hadn’t had the chance to before. 

 

And now that he knows that, maybe he can control it. 

 

He smiled when Derek appeared in the doorway, two mugs of coffee in his hands. He sat up and accepted one, pressing a soft kiss on Derek’s lips in the process. 

 

“You smell happy today.” Derek said, smiling back at him. 

 

“I’m feeling better today. I think you were right, Dr. Patel helped me out.” 

 

“Good. Ready to get up and head to Beacon Hills?”

 

“Hell yeah!” Stiles said, laughing when Derek plucked the mug from Stiles fingers before his flailing arms spilled coffee everywhere. 

 

Yeah. The dreams weren’t going to ruin everything. 

 

He was going to be just fine. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Leave a comment/kudos to let me know what you think :)
> 
> Or [come say hi on tumblr!](http://happyjuicyfruit.tumblr.com/)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Back to Beacon Hills!
> 
> Warnings in the end notes this time :)

Derek felt his shoulders relax with every mile south they drove.  Stiles started blabbing on happily beside him an hour into the drive. He was fast asleep by hour two. 

 

Yes, this had been the right decision. 

 

By the time Derek pulled into the sheriff’s driveway, Stiles was awake and looking better than he had in weeks. Before Derek could even put the truck in park, Stiles was scrambling out of the car, Charlie tucked under his arm. He raced to his father, who was already standing on the front porch, smiling happily at him. 

 

John’s cane clattered to the ground while they hugged each other tightly. 

 

John Stilinski wasn’t technically the Sheriff of Beacon Hills anymore. After everything that had happened, with Stiles and his own year long coma, John didn’t feel the need to be the sheriff. Probably wouldn’t have been able to do the job if he wanted to. His year in a coma had left him with unpredictable lightheadedness and dizzy spells, as well as deteriorated muscle mass in his legs and arms. 

 

While he had recovered a lot since waking up, no one knew if he would ever get back to what he had been. The cane was a precaution, but also a reminder. He couldn’t run off after the bad guys anymore. 

 

He was Deputy Stilinski again, and he mostly sat behind a desk and filled in the paperwork. 

 

John said he didn’t mind, he was just happy he could talk to his kid again every day. Connect with Melissa, like they had been flirting around for years. Get off work every day at 5 pm and not have to worry about getting called back in. 

 

Actually take vacations. 

 

Besides, John always added with a smile, everyone always called him Sheriff out of habit anyway. Including Parrish, the man who was actually the sheriff now. 

 

Derek smiled at the pair as he squeezed past them with the bags. He knew from experience that they wouldn’t be letting go for a while. 

 

“Derek, sweetheart, it’s so good to see you!” Melissa said, pulling Derek in for a hug after he’d set their bags by the stairs. Unlike the Stilinski’s, they let go within a few seconds. “How was the drive?” 

 

“Good. Not much traffic.” 

 

“Good, good, you bring those bags upstairs, settle in. Dinner will be ready in about an hour.” 

 

“Sounds great,” Derek said, smiling at the woman and she eyed the two men on the porch. Predictably, they were still clutching each other’s arms like they hadn’t seen each other in years. Charlie, at least, had been released and was rolling around on the grass. 

 

Derek made his way up to Stiles old room. It was a bit different now, which was good. After everything that had happened in this room, the shit Theo put Stiles through, the nights they had spent here not knowing if his dad would survive… Stiles wouldn’t have been able to sleep in it, if it still looked the same. 

 

Now, the double bed had been replaced with a queen. The posters replaced with framed pictures of family and friends. Stiles old things cleared out, most of them moved to their cottage in Oregon. A dresser sat where his desk once did. The walls were now a pale green. 

 

No matter how much it changed though, Derek would always be able to picture a high school Stiles in here. Bitching and complaining to Derek, even as he helped him. 

 

Stiles, as it turned out, would never stop being an enigma. 

 

Loud footsteps on the stairs had Derek turning around, opening his arms before the man even appeared. He was glad he did, as Stiles flew in a moment later, arms around Derek’s neck and laughter in his eyes. 

 

The kiss was long and deep. Stiles legs wrapped around his hips like a koala. 

 

“Happy to be home?” Derek asked when he pulled back. 

 

“Yeah,” Stiles placed his forehead against his. “Thanks for bringing me back.” 

 

“Always.” 

 

\-- 

 

Melissa and the Sheriff cook them dinner, a roast with potatoes. Derek laughed when Stiles excitedly pointed out that there was not only one, not two, but  _ three _ different vegetables with the meal. 

 

Stiles and Melissa high fived over keeping the Sheriff healthy by force. John scowled in the background.

 

It was nice. 

 

After dinner, the four of them play a few rounds of Yahtzee. A Stilinski-McCall tradition from when Stiles was a kid that they’ve brought back the past year. Derek enjoyed seeing Stiles so happy with his dad and the woman who has practically become his step-mother. He only wished he was better at Yahtzee - he lost every game. 

 

After the game, Derek and Stiles cleaned up the kitchen before taking Charlie on a walk. When they got back Stiles sat downstairs with his dad for a bit longer as Derek went up and set up their room. 

 

Yeah, it had been a good day. 

 

But now Derek was starting to feel the sour taste of worry in his mouth. 

 

Stiles was curled up beside him in the bed, asleep, but his heart was not beating the quiet, steady, beat Derek had grown used to. His breath was quick and erratic. His eyes moved wildly under their lids.

 

Derek felt like an idiot for thinking coming to Beacon Hills would solve the problem. 

 

“Stiles,” Derek called, reaching forward to grab his shoulder. Stiles let out a small gasp at his touch. Charlie whined beside him. “Stiles, it’s okay. You’re okay. Wake up.” He shook him gently. 

 

Stiles eyes flew open. He stared at Derek blankly, and even flinched back from Charlie when the pup tried to lick his face. 

 

“Stiles?” 

 

Stiles eyes jumped to Derek again, and then he finally took on a large breath and relaxed. His shoulders sagged as he got his breathing under control. He fell back onto his pillow, curling an arm around Charlie when the little dog shoved his nose into Stiles neck. 

 

Derek watched all of this with worried eyes. 

 

“Are you alright?” 

 

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine.” 

 

Derek brow furrowed in concern, “that was pretty intense.” 

 

Stiles took three steady breaths before he replied, “I’m fine, go back to sleep.” 

 

“I wasn’t asleep, I was still reading.” 

 

“Okay, then, go back to reading.” Stiles ran a hand over his face. Derek noticed it was shaking. 

 

“Let me get you some water,” Derek pushed back the duvet, already sticking a leg out when Stiles stopped him. 

 

“No, seriously, Derek, I’m fine. Just- do your own thing. I can go get my own water.” 

 

Derek frowned, “you’ve just had an intense nightmare, Stiles, you’re not fine. I don’t mind if you don’t want to talk about it, but don’t lie to me.” 

 

“It wasn’t a nightmare.” 

 

Derek lifted a brow. “Then what was it?” 

 

“Nothing.” 

 

“ _ Stiles _ -“ 

 

“Will you drop it, for once?!” 

 

Derek closed his mouth with a click, his lips curved in a frown. He leaned back against the headboard, his eyes on Stiles. The man had his hand covering his eyes. Derek waited for the hand to stop shaking before he spoke. 

 

“I only want to help you.” 

 

Stiles let out a breath. “I know, big guy. I know.” 

 

“What do you need?” 

 

“Nothing. It wasn’t- it wasn’t even a nightmare, okay? Nothing to worry about.” 

 

“Then why won’t you look at me?” 

 

Stiles didn’t respond. A moment later, he dropped his hand and turned to Derek. His eyes were red rimmed, but he wasn’t crying. He couldn’t make it past Derek’s chest, though, he wouldn’t meet Derek’s eye. 

 

“Stiles…” 

 

“I’m going to go, uh, wash up. Don’t wait up for me.” 

 

“Stiles, wait-“ 

 

But he was already gone. Off the bed and out of the room, the bathroom door across the hall closed soon after. Charlie turned to Derek, a heartbroken look on his face. 

 

“Me too, pup.” Derek murmured, running a hand over the dogs back. “I’m worried about him, too.” 

 

—

 

Stiles braced his hands on the sink, his head dipped down low as he panted.  Now that he was alone, he was shaking again. His breath carefully counted and controlled. If he didn’t keep himself in check, he knew he was going to have a panic attack. 

 

He felt like a fucking idiot. 

 

Coming to Beacon Hills had felt like a solution, an easy way out of a problem Stiles didn’t even understand. He thought that maybe these weird dreams, hallucinations, whatever they were- he thought they would stop if he left for a bit. If he stopped doing whatever it was that was causing him stress. If he saw his dad. 

 

But they hadn’t stopped. If anything, this one had been worse. 

 

This one had been about his mom. 

 

Stiles fingers curled around the cold porcelain of the sink as a wave of nausea ran through him. He breathed through it as he watched the beads of sweat drip off his forehead and into the sink bellow. 

 

“Get a grip, Stiles, it wasn’t  _ real _ .” 

 

But it had felt real. It had felt really fucking  _ real _ . And that meant...  if his mom had been real then that meant that the next person had been real too, that _ Kate Argent  _ had been real, and standing right in front of him, and-

 

Stiles lost his battle of wills. He barely made it to the toilet before he was emptying his stomach out. He felt disgusting when he finally pulled back. Closing the lid and flushing it all down, Stiles fell against the wall and knocked his head against the wood. 

 

He closed his eyes. 

 

The place he had been was the same as always, a white mass of nothing. His mom had been there instead of Allison, which was different, but the theme was the same. She was dressed in the yellow, sunflower spotted, dress they had buried her in. The last thing he had ever seen her in. The dress she had worn almost every day during the summer when he was in second grade. The last summer they had had with her. 

 

She had looked the same as she had in that summer. Her cheeks had been pink, healthy. Her hair had fallen soft and loose over her shoulders. She hadn’t looked gaunt, she hadn’t had that terrified glint in her eye, like she’d had when she was sick. 

 

She had been his mom again. 

 

_ “Mischief,”  _ she had said, _ “I’ve missed you so much. I love you to the moon and the stars,  _ _ kochanie. I hope you have remembered that.”  _

 

Of course he had. Of course he’d remembered his mother loved him, what a fucked up thing for his brain to show him. 

 

Because that was all it had been, right? A dream. A way to process all the shit he had been through, a way to process his grief, even after all these years. 

 

But then she had said,  _ “I am so proud of the man you have become, kochanie. You are so brave, so strong. I am so proud of you for finding your own pack and your own path. I am so happy you have found love with Derek.”  _

 

Which, like, what? She hadn’t known about that, she couldn’t have, so how had… was it just wishful thinking? What he had wanted to hear his mother say? Allison had talked a lot, but she hadn’t  _ known _ things about Stiles life. She hadn’t known anything about the world after her death. 

 

So what the fuck was happening? 

 

And not only did his mom known that, but she seemed to know more than he did. She’d ended with,  _ “be careful, my little Mischief, it’s dangerous in here.”  _

 

Stiles… Stiles had barely been able to tell her he loved her, he missed her every day, before she smiled at him and vanished. 

 

Kate Argent had taken her place. As if Stiles hadn’t been in enough emotional distress, might as well throw in his boyfriend’s abuser in. Why the fuck not. 

 

She had looked just as slimy and annoying as she had while she had been alive. Stiles hadn’t talked to her much, so he didn’t actually know how she was supposed to dress or act, but it seemed to fit. Tight jeans, boots, leather jacket, smarmy smile that was just asking to get punched right off her face. It added up. 

 

_ “Heya, Stiles, rumour has it you’ve found my old toy. I hope you’re having as much fun with him as I did.”  _ She had said before she fucking winked at him.  _ Winked _ . Like it was funny, what she had done to Derek. Stiles had told her to fuck off, but she had ignored him.  _ “I wonder if he’s still as well trained as he had been when I was with him. I swear, if I had asked, he would have crawled for me, pathetic monster that he was. I made him kiss my feet once right before sex, just to see if he would. And still the dog wanted to cuddle after. It was disgusting.”  _

 

Stiles had been able to hold back after that. He had shouted at her, screamed at the top of his lungs all of the insults he could think of. 

 

All she had done was laugh. 

 

“ _ You know, I might be dead, but I still won. I got to lick those abs and take out a whole pack all in one day.” _ She’d smirked at him, like the psychopath she was,  _ “Derek was never the same after me. He never will be. My legacy lives on, and there is nothing you can do about it.”  _

 

Stiles hadn’t known what to say to that. He told her she was wrong, of course, that she was a psychopathic, life ruining, bitch, and that Derek’s life was great despite everything she had done but he had felt something shift at those words. 

 

Because she was right. Derek never would be the same, after what she had done to him. 

 

But that didn’t mean she had won. 

 

Stiles pulled himself to his feet and stripped out of his pajamas. He turned on the shower and then very carefully crawled in, leaning heavily on the wall as the warm water washed over him. 

 

\-- 

 

Stiles managed to get a few more hours of sleep, but only because he knew Derek would be lying awake all night if he hadn’t tried. Derek was still asleep when Stiles woke up at six, and Stiles slipped out without waking him. 

 

He carried Charlie down stairs, immediately heading to the backyard for Charlie’s morning pee. He left the door open so the dog could come back when he was ready. He turned around to head to the coffee machine. 

 

“Morning, kiddo.”

 

“Jeez!” Stiles clutched at his chest, eyes focusing on his father, who is calmly sitting at the kitchen table, sipping on a coffee and reading the news. “Thanks for the morning heart attack.” 

 

His dad's forehead creased at him in concern. “I thought you’d have seen me sitting here. You okay, kid?” 

 

“Yeah,” Stiles shook his head, rubbing at his chest. “Yeah, I’m fine.” 

 

His dad didn’t say anything as Stiles moved around the kitchen, making himself coffee and toast. He did look at him pointedly, however, when Stiles sat down across from him.

 

“What?” 

 

“You’re not fine.” 

 

Stiles gaped at him, “I am too!”

 

His dad did not look impressed. “Stiles, you look exhausted. Even more so than yesterday. Derek looked like he wanted to swaddle you last night when you started yawning during the game. And I know that boys protective, but not like that. Not for no reason. So what’s going on?”

 

Stiles felt a bitter taste in his mouth at the words. He put down his coffee carefully, fiddling with the mug instead of looking at his dad. 

 

He thought about his dream last night. 

 

“Do you ever dream about Mom?” He asked, barely over a whisper. 

 

He heard his dad's chair creek, and he glanced up to find him leaning back in his chair, watching Stiles thoughtfully. 

 

“Not in a while. When I was in the hospital, though, I dreamed of talking to her a lot.” His dad took a sip of his coffee, his eyes glossing over in memory. “She was always wearing that dress she loved, the one with the sunflowers. She looked like she had when she was running through the garden with you, remember? That last summer we had with her, when you two decided to put flowers all around the whole house.” He shook his head fondly, “You never did make it past the back garden.” 

 

Stiles felt his breath catch in his throat. He could picture her so vividly, in that dress, wearing her carefree smile. Almost like he just saw her yesterday. 

 

Or last night. 

 

“We talked a lot. That’s one of the reasons why I was so willing to move on with Melissa, when I woke up. She helped me come to terms with the fact that I’ll see her again, but not for a long time. It’s okay for me to keep living.” His dad looked up at him again, his face soft. “I like to think that those were more than dreams, and that I actually got to talk to her again but,” he shrugged. “I do know that she loved us though. And that she would be proud of you.” 

 

“Yeah,” Stiles said, his mind spinning elsewhere. “I know she would be.” 

 

Because he’s pretty sure she told him last night. 

 

—

 

His dad gave him a long hug after their talk, before heading up to shower. Stiles sat in the kitchen alone, having an existential crisis of life after death. 

 

Was he talking to the dead in his sleep? It didn’t seem possible, but then, nothing in his life ever did…

 

Derek came down at quarter after eight. They didn’t talk about what happened the night before,  but Derek kept shooting him looks. Looks of concern, worry, question. 

 

Stiles wasn’t going to bring it up though. He couldn’t… he couldn’t even think about it, right now. 

 

They spent the day with his dad and Melissa. They walked Charlie through the dog park just outside of town, and got ice cream at the place his dad used to take him as a kid. If Dad and Melissa noticed anything between him and Derek, they didn’t mention it. Which was something Stiles greatly appreciated. There was a tenseness between them. A stiffness to Derek’s shoulders, and an awkward feeling every time Stiles moved away from him. 

 

They needed to talk. Stiles knew they needed to talk… but they couldn’t do it here. 

Stiles wasn’t ready yet. 

 

They all went out to dinner at the diner, sitting outside so Charlie could join them too. With his dad he felt like he could settle back into his old skin, pretend he was still in high school again. It was refreshing, having people to talk to who weren’t around to witness how Stiles had been in New York. Who didn’t know what he looked like high, or how his hands shook in a particular way when the cravings hit. 

 

The feeling never lasted long though. 

 

Being an addict was a part of who he was. No matter how long it had been since he stopped, the craving was always there. What it had felt like to be blissfully numb was something he would never forget. 

 

The scars on his arms from the needles were never going to go away. 

 

His dad had a new look for him now, whenever Stiles year abroad was brought up in any way. Like at the diner, when the waitress asked what college he went to, and he’d said he was taking online courses at a community college. His dad gave him the  _ look _ . It was a mix of grief and guilt. Like he had lost his son, the son who had wanted to go to Berkeley, who laughed at everything at anytime, who was carefree and limitless. The son who had lost everything while his father lay in a coma, powerless to help. 

 

Stiles always looked away, when his dad gave him that look. 

 

There was nothing either of them could do about it now, anyway. The past was in the past. And he was better now. Things were good. 

 

Even if he had never made it to Berkeley.

 

After dinner they drove back to the Stilinski house. Stiles gave his dad and Melissa hugs and told them he would see them later, he was going to go see Scott for a bit. Derek’s hand on his shoulder stopped him from gathering up Charlie’s leash and walking away. 

 

“I’ll drive.” 

 

Stiles wanted to protest, but he bit his lip and nodded. Not just for Derek, but because he knew Marco and the rest of the pack still didn’t trust Scott. He had to have an escort whenever he went to visit the other Alpha. 

 

Last time he had had Isaac and Lisa though, and that had been great. They’d had a make out session in the bathroom, giving Scott and Stiles plenty of time to catch up. Unlike Derek, who usually sat beside Stiles stoically and ignored anything Scott tried to say to him. 

 

Like, he got it, Scott had been a giant dick to Derek, and Derek clearly would never forgive him for what he had done to Stiles, but he could at least say hello to the man. It would make it a lot less awkward. 

 

—

 

The drive to Scott’s place was silent. Stiles refused to be the first to break, even though Derek had a lot more experience than him at not talking to people. Derek was practically a professional at this point, and Stiles was but a lowly student, but he wasn’t breaking. Not this time. 

 

At least… not yet. 

 

Derek pulled up outside the house and cut the engine. Scott lived alone in a basement apartment now that Melissa had moved in with his dad. Stiles knew he had been hoping to live with Liam but…for now he was saving money to buy a larger house, so that the rest of his small pack could live with him if they wanted to. 

 

Derek was glaring daggers at the house before Stiles even moved to open the door. 

 

Stiles sighed, looked like he was going to break first after all. Not about anything important though, just the silence in the car. 

 

That’s what he was telling himself. 

 

“Look, I know you don’t like him, but he’s still my friend. Why don’t you play with Charlie in the yard while I go and talk to him? You don’t have to see him, and you can still listen into what we’re saying.” 

 

Derek huffed at him. 

 

“ _ Derek _ , come on, I’m being super understanding and shit!” 

 

Derek rolled his eyes at him. Rude. “Fine, I’ll stay in the yard. But I’m coming in if I hear anything I don’t like.” 

 

Both of Stiles eyebrows shot up, he hadn’t actually expected that to work so easily. “You don’t like anything that comes out of Scott’s mouth.” 

 

Derek didn’t deny it as he got out of the car. Stiles shook his head fondly as he followed after him. He handed Charlie over before walking around the side of the house and down the steps. Scott opened the door before he even raised his hand to knock. 

 

“Stiles!” He wrapped Stiles in a hug, patting his back gently. Stiles tried not to stiffen too much in his arms. 

 

“Hey bro, how’s it going?” Stiles asked, patting on Scott’s back once before pulling away. Scott’s face flickered for a second in hurt, probably because Stiles was always the one to pull away first, but Stiles smiled at him and pushed forward. If they ignored the giant pink elephant between them, they would be fine. That’s the best he could do for his old friend. 

 

“Good, good, come in,” Scott led the way in to his apartment. The entranceway walked into the kitchen, and quickly turned into the living room. Two doors were at the other end of the living room, leading to a bedroom and a bathroom. It was small, but it was adorable. Stiles could actually picture a little, fifteen year old, Scott loving this place. He would have plastered the walls with posters and probably begged his landlord to allow him to get a dog. 

 

A twenty year old Scott didn’t have the same taste, apparently. There wasn’t much on the walls, and a few potted plants along the window sill that lined the kitchen wall. Twenty year old Scott thought it would be too much time and money to get a dog. 

 

Twenty year old Stiles disagreed, but he was a bit bias. He was always looking for other puppies for Charlie to be friends with. 

 

Scott and Stiles sat on opposite ends of the couch. Stiles leg bounced with nerves when neither of them knew how to start a conversation. He felt ridiculous. This was Scott, his friend, his brother, he should be able to say anything he wanted to him, but… this was also Scott, the person who had abandoned Stiles when he had needed him the most. 

 

Stiles knew Scott had changed, was still trying to change, since then. He knew that Scott called Marco for Alpha advice on the regular, and that he was trying really hard to repair the relationships he had damaged when Theo was around. But Stiles still felt safer here, knowing that Derek was outside, listening to everything they were saying. 

 

Which was stupid. Especially considering he hadn’t even wanted Derek to come this time. 

 

“So, uh, where’s the entourage?” Scott finally asked. Stiles smirked. 

 

“Derek’s outside with Charlie.” 

 

“Ah,” Scott nodded. “How is everyone else up in Oregon?” 

 

That broke the ice. They chatted about Stiles pack for a bit, and then about Scott’s. Half an hour later, Stiles felt comfortable enough to lean back against the couch, legs spread out in front of him as he laughed at a story about Liam accidently saying yes to a date with another guy. A  _ third _ date. 

 

“How did he not notice the first two were dates? What did he think was happening?” 

 

“I don’t know, he thought they were just hanging out I guess. They’re still friends, apparently, but I don’t know how long that will last. Liam was pissed at Mason, he had known the whole time.” 

 

Stiles snorted, shaking his head at the idiots. “Sweet, little, innocent baby.” 

 

“Right? I don’t think we were ever that innocent.” 

 

“No. And Liam’s, what, eighteen by now? Damn, by eighteen, I was-” Stiles cut himself off. They didn’t have to talk about the shit Stiles had been doing when he was eighteen. 

 

Scott shifted awkwardly, before pointing behind him. “Hey, want a drink? I’ve got, uh, cok- soda.” Scott winced. “Or um, water. Or beer, do you want a beer? Can you… can you have a beer?” 

 

Stiles rubbed his hands against his jeans. He was beginning to think this might have gone better if Derek had been in here with him, glaring at Scott for being an idiot the whole time. “Uh, no. I’m fine without a drink. Thanks though.” 

 

“Would you mind if I had one?” 

 

“Um,” Stiles eyes flicked to the door, half expecting Derek to come barging through at the mere suggestion of alcohol being around Stiles. “I don’t think that would be a good idea.” 

 

Scott followed the movement, frowning when his eyes landed back on Stiles. “Why? Because Derek is here this time? Dude, we went to a bar last time, and Isaac and Lisa didn’t seem to mind.” 

 

Stiles glanced at the door again. He hadn’t wanted Derek to find out about that like this. “Yeah, well, they still came with me and stayed the whole time. They’re just… everyone’s protective of me, okay? It’s not just Derek.” 

 

Scott looked at him in disbelief, “Stiles, there’s being protective, and then there’s this. They won’t even let you hang out with someone from another pack without supervision. I know I did some shitty things, but it’s been over a year, dude. He’s controlling you. This isn’t healthy.” 

 

Stiles glared at him, “they’re being  _ protective _ . Derek is protecting me. And he has every right to do it. You don’t understand, you weren’t there. You don’t know what it was like for me in New York.” 

 

“So you took some drugs to cope with your grief, that’s understandable, man, a lot of people do it. It doesn’t mean your like- like some-” 

 

“Like some homeless junkie? Yeah, that’s exactly what it was like. I was an drug addict, doing whatever I could to get my fix! It was beyond grief, beyond- beyond anything to do with my dad. I had _given up_. So shut the fuck up, Scott, you don’t know shit, okay? You weren’t there! _Derek_ _was_.” Stiles ran a hand over his face. He was exhausted. “God, this was a mistake. All of this has been a mistake, I shouldn’t have gone to the bar last time. I shouldn’t have asked Derek to stay outside this time. I… maybe I shouldn’t even be here.” 

 

“Stiles, come on, you’re my best friend, of course you should be here!” Scott stood up, taking a few steps into the room like he was trying to block Stiles path to the door. Jesus, maybe he was. “I don’t know anything because you don’t  _ tell me _ anything. How am I supposed to know how bad it was if you don’t tell me?” 

 

“Why would I tell you? You’re the last person I would trust.” Stiles breath hitched at the last word, because it was true. And by the way Scott’s face practically crumbled, he knew it too. 

 

Fuck. He couldn’t deal with this. 

 

He moved to stand, but froze when his vision began to blur as soon as he sat up. 

 

“Fuck, not now.” He hadn’t had an episode in  _ months _ , he thought he was through with this. 

 

“Stiles?” 

 

“I-” darkness started to creep in, quickly. “Get Derek. Tell Derek code black.” 

 

“What? Stiles are you-” 

 

Stiles didn’t hear the rest of what Scott had to say. He was already gone. 

 

\-- 

 

Derek watched Stiles walk around the house and waited until he was gone before he sighed and slumped his shoulders. 

 

This trip was not going how he had planned. 

 

Stiles was back to looking exhausted. Derek knew he had gotten some sleep last night, but not nearly enough. The dark smudges under his eyes were back, as well as the tired droop in his shoulders. If he thought he was hiding it from anyone, he was being a fool. Both John and Melissa had asked him what was wrong when Stiles had his back turned, and Derek could do nothing but shake his head. He didn’t know. 

 

Stiles wouldn’t tell him. 

 

The only thing he knew was that it was connected to the dreams he’d been having. The ones he claimed weren’t nightmares. He had thought coming back to Beacon Hills would help, but, for all Derek knew, Stiles could be having flashbacks to seeing his dad dying in his arms, and having to deal with Theo. Or having the Nogitsune walking around with his face… This was probably one of his worst plans… and that was saying something. 

 

Charlie yipped at him from the grass, clearly disappointed Derek wasn’t paying any attention to him. Derek sighed, moving over and lying down next to the dog. 

 

“What am I supposed to do, Charlie? He won’t talk to me.” 

 

Charlie panted at his face and then ran off to pee on a bush. Which was honestly more of a response than he had expected. 

 

Derek sighed again. He closed his eyes and listened in on the conversation Stiles and Scott were having. It sounded mostly like stilted discussion about their pack, and not much else. It didn’t look like Stiles relationship with Scott was going to be jumping back to where it had been a few years ago. 

 

The thought didn’t cheer Derek up nearly as much as he thought it should. 

 

His phone buzzed in his pocket a few minutes later, he pulled it out and checked the caller ID. 

 

“Hey Cora.” Derek sighed into the phone, eyes on the clouds above. They were starting to turn pink as the sun set. It was pretty. 

 

“Hey loser, how’s the trip?” 

 

“Fine. Melissa and the Sheriff have been great. Stiles is visiting with Scott now.” 

 

“Alone?” Cora asked, her voice sharp. Derek smiled. 

 

“No, I’m sitting right outside the door. Don’t worry.” 

 

“Good. You know how we feel about that.” 

 

Derek rolled his eyes. Cora had started to refer to herself as the Alpha female, and was calling any Alpha decision ‘theirs’ ever since she got pregnant with her second. She said if they were real wolves, she would be, so why not as werewolves? They all were going along with it and hoping it ended when her hormones balanced out. 

 

“I know. I wouldn’t leave him alone, you know that.” 

 

Cora hummed softly over the phone. “Is he doing any better?” 

 

Derek glanced over to the side of the house, listening in to the conversation again. They were laughing about something now. 

 

“Yeah, kind of. He had a nightmare last night.” 

 

“About his dad?” 

 

Derek shook his head, “he wouldn’t tell me.” 

 

“Oh, Der, you know he’ll tell you when he’s ready. He needs to process everything in his big brain first, before sharing it. That’s why you took him on this trip, right? To give him time to do that?” Derek was silent for a minute, and Cora laughed. “That was your plan, right? Because here I thought you were being smart for once.” 

 

Cora laughed again, and Derek smiled. She really reminded him of Laura sometimes. 

 

“I wanted to give him a break away from everything.” 

 

“Yeah, sure, give him time, give him a break, same thing. You did good, bro. Now bring our future emissary back in one piece before this baby pops right out of me.” 

 

Derek snorted, “you’re two months away from your due date.” 

 

“I could pop at any moment, Der.” 

 

“Okay, well. Wait till I get there first. I love you.” 

 

“I love you, too. See you soon.”

 

There was a click, and the call ended. Derek sighed and pushed it back into his pocket. Then he bolted up straight and twisted towards the house- he heard shouting. 

 

He was halfway down the stairs when he heard it, “Tell Derek code black.” 

 

“Fuck. Charlie!” Derek turned back around, calling for the dog. He ran to the truck and jerked open the door, helping the dog get inside quickly. “Okay, we’ve practiced this, Charlie, you can do it. Find the bag of mountainash, okay? Where’s the bag of mountain ash?” 

 

Charlie wagged his tail as his nose dipped under the passenger seat, grabbing onto the cloth bag that Stiles always kept there.  He pulled back and presented the bag to Derek, his entire body wagging. 

 

“Derek! Derek, something’s wrong with Stiles!” Scott came running into the front lawn, but Derek ignored him. Instead he instructed Charlie to jump down and follow him. 

 

“No, no,” Derek said when Charlie moved to drop it at his feet. “Hold the bag, Charlie, Stiles needs it. Let’s go find Stiles.” 

 

Charlie’s eyes widened and he trotted forward gleefully at Stiles name. Derek pushed Scott out of the way when all he did was stand there and watch Charlie carry the cloth bag across the lawn and then down the stairs. Inside the apartment, they found Stiles sitting on the floor, his gaze empty and his body still. 

 

“Damnit. Okay, Charlie drop the bag now, and open it.” 

 

Charlie dropped the bag, and then looked up at Stiles expectantly. Like they were about to start playing fetch. 

 

“No, for the-” Derek took a breath, crouching down beside the dog. “Open the bag, Charlie, see?” He pointed at the zipper, “open. Open the bag.” 

 

Charlie dug his teeth into the pink tab Stiles had put on the zipper so Charlie could do this and started to pull. Derek sighed in relief. “Good boy, good boy. Now drag it in a circle, right Charlie? Drag in a circle.” Derek made a circle motion with his hand, and Charlie started to drag the bag around Stiles like he had been trained. “Good boy, Charlie.” 

 

Derek sat back on his heels and watched as Charlie dragged the bag around Stiles whole body. He only stopped when Derek told him he could. “Good boy. Now you can go lie in Stiles lap.” 

 

Charlie wagged his tail as Derek patted his back a few times, then he trotted over to the line and curled up in Stiles crossed legs. It was only then that Derek felt himself relax. 

 

“What’s going on?” 

 

Derek didn’t bother to turn and look at Scott hesitating in his own doorway. He didn’t care, so long as Stiles was safe behind the mountain ash barrier. 

 

“He won’t be able to see or hear anything for a while. He’s in a kind of comatose state… it happens whenever Stiles gets anxious or overwhelmed.” 

 

“Is he- will he be okay?” Scott asked, now only a few feet behind Derek. 

 

“He’ll come out of it in his own time.” 

 

“Wow I- I’m sorry, I didn’t know. Is this… did Theo do this?” 

 

“No. This has been happening since the Nogitsune,” Derek glanced behind him then, only to see Scott’s reaction. “And it used to happen a lot more often.” 

 

Scott looked gutted by the news, but Derek turned back to Stiles. He ignored Scott’s spluttering apology, and ignored him when he tried to ask Derek something a few minutes later. 

 

He sat and watched Stiles, and waited. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Stiles has a dream about his mother, and a dream about Kate Argent. References to abuse of a minor in that dream.   
> Stiles past drug use/homelessness is also brought up in this chapter.   
> Stiles gets into a fight with Scott- triggering a 'black out' episode 
> 
> \-- 
> 
>  
> 
> Thanks for reading! Leave a comment to let me know how you're like it thus far! :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter :) Happy reading!  
> Also! Finally figured out that this is going to be 12 chapters long :) 1/3 of the way in! 
> 
>  
> 
> Warnings at the end.

Stiles is only gone for forty minutes, but it felt like forever. He came back to himself quickly, like he always did, blinking down at Charlie, and then past the barrier to Derek. Derek watched as Stiles shoulders relaxed at the sight of him, and then instantly went rigid again when he caught sight of Scott sitting at the table behind him. 

 

If Scott noticed too, he didn’t say anything. 

 

“Here’s the bag,” Derek said, tossing it in past the line. “We should get going.” 

 

Stiles nodded, grabbing the bag and making a sweeping motion with his hand. Derek heard Scott gasp behind him when the ash began to pour itself back into the bag. They both ignored him. 

 

When Stiles was done, he held his hand out to Derek, it felt like a peace offering. After he helped pull Stiles to his feet, he didn’t let go. 

 

“So, uh, are you okay?” Scott asked. “What- what was that?” 

 

“I’m fine, don’t worry about it. Sorry that happened on your floor.” 

 

“Dude, don’t - I don’t care about that! I’m just so- what  _ was _ that?” 

 

Stiles didn’t respond, instead he began to tug Derek towards the door, Charlie and cloth bag tucked under his other arm. 

 

“Stiles,  _ wait- _ ” 

 

“I’ll see you later, okay Scott? I need to go home now.” Stiles voice sounded calm, but Derek knew he was panicking underneath it. Derek was too - Stiles hasn’t had an incident this long in almost a year. 

 

When Scott opened his mouth to speak again, Derek growled at him, low and angry. Loud enough for Stiles to hear, though he didn’t object. Scott took a step back in surprise, and didn’t try to stop them again as they left his home. Derek closed the door behind himself. 

 

In the car, Derek was the first to break the quiet. 

 

“What happened?” 

 

Stiles didn’t answer for a moment. His eyebrows were furrowed heavily as he stared out the window. Finally, he said, “nothing.” 

 

“Stiles, you were out for forty minutes. That hasn’t happened in a long time.” 

 

“It was nothing, just some shit Scott said.” Stiles eyes cut to him. “Weren’t you listening?” 

 

“I was trying to give you privacy, I came when I heard you shouting, but it was already too late. Why won’t you tell me what’s going on?” 

 

“Because it’s nothing! God!” Stiles threw his hands in the air, “I can handle it on my own, Derek. You never trust me to do anything!” 

 

Derek looked over at him in alarm. “Stiles, I’m only trying to help-” 

 

“Yeah, well, maybe I don’t need your help with literally  _ everything _ !” Stiles snapped back, slumping down in his chair and twisting away from him. 

 

Derek closed his mouth and turned to face the road again. If Stiles didn’t want him saying anything else, then fine, he wouldn’t. 

 

Even if it made his chest ache. 

 

\-- 

 

Derek slept on the couch that night. He waited for John and Melissa to go to bed, before grabbing his pillow and walking down stairs. Stiles didn’t say anything when he left. 

 

It hurt. 

 

Derek lay on the couch with his arms crossed and a small blanket thrown over his legs. He’d slept in worse conditions, but… not in a long time. He didn’t even remember the last time he’d slept without Stiles and Charlie. He rubbed absently at his chest as he wondered what they were going to do tomorrow. 

 

Maybe he would spend a night in the big house, in one of the beds there. Maybe he really was crowding Stiles too much. 

 

Derek sighed and closed his eyes, but it was hopeless. He doubted he would be getting any sleep that night. 

 

His eyes popped open again an hour later when he heard a shout coming from Stiles room. He threw the blanket off of him and climbed the stairs two at a time. When he reached the bedroom, Stiles was twisted in the sheets, small noises of distress coming out between his clenched teeth. 

 

“Stiles!” Derek called, stepping into the room. Charlie whined from Derek’s side of the bed. Stiles didn't react to either of them. “Stiles, come on, wake up,” Derek reached out and grabbed Stiles shoulder, giving it a little shake. Stiles woke up with a gasp. 

 

“Derek?” 

 

“Yeah, it’s me-” Derek barely got the words out before Stiles was clinging to him, his strong hands balled in Derek’s pajama shirt. 

 

“Stiles, hey, it’s okay.” Derek shushed him as he ran a soothing hand down Stiles sweaty back. Stiles just clung harder. A moment passed, then another, and Stiles showed no sign of letting go. Derek gently rearranged them until he was sitting on the bed too, Stiles curled in his arms. 

 

“I’m sorry,” Derek whispered, “I’m sorry if I’m overbearing. I-” 

 

“No, no big guy, I’m sorry.”

 

“No, it’s-” 

 

“Seriously, Derek,” Stiles leaned back, wiping a hand across his tear stained cheeks, “I’m sorry. You were right, there is something going on with me. I’ve been having these fucked up dreams and I- I don’t think they’re dreams. I think they’re real, and I- I don’t know what to do!” 

 

“I- what?” Derek raised his eyebrows, that was not what he had been expecting. “You have been having nightmares?” 

 

“No, they aren’t nightmares.” Stiles sniffed, moving back an inch so they could talk but still holding onto Derek’s arms in a tight grip. “It’s like… it’s like dead people have been coming to visit me when I sleep.” 

 

“Dead people.” 

 

“Yeah, dead people. Like Allison, Erica and Boyd… and, my mom.” Stiles paused after that, his eyes searching Derek’s before he looked down at his hands on Derek’s arms. “Some others, too. I’m in a big white, like, room, I guess. With them. And… it’s really starting to freak me out, Derek. Like, I don’t know, I don’t know what this is, I’ve never heard of this before.” Stiles pulled one of his hands back to wipe at his face again. Derek ran a hand over Stiles head. 

 

“It’s going to be okay, we’ll… we’ll figure something out, okay? We’ll talk to Nana.” 

 

Stiles nodded. Derek could tell he wasn’t telling him everything, but he was so glad Stiles had told him this. He pulled the man into his arms again, pushing his nose into Stiles hair. “Thank you for telling me.” Derek whispered. 

 

Stiles didn’t respond, but they fell asleep in each others arms that night, Charlie tucked up behind Stiles back. 

 

\-- 

 

The next morning they woke up early to head out. John and Melissa made them a big breakfast, and they all stood by the front door saying goodbye for about a million years, but eventually they got going. 

 

Stiles was anxious to get this sorted out. 

 

If only the drive wasn’t a gazillion hours long. 

 

“It’s not that long,” Derek said, always the voice of reason. Stiles rolled his eyes. 

 

“Do you really think Nana will know what this is?” Stiles asked, gnawing on his thumb nail. Derek reached over to knock his hand away from his mouth, but that only made him lean farther away to do it. Amateur. 

 

“If she doesn’t, I’m sure she’ll know someone who knows what to do. She’ll get you sorted out.” 

 

Stiles nodded, but he didn’t know if he believed it. This was probably another symptom of his fucked up brain, post Nogitsune possession. He was probably going to dream of dead people for the rest of his life. 

 

Jesus, that was a horrible thought. He couldn’t imagine spending the rest of his life fighting Theo off and then having nice, long, chats with Kate Argent about- 

 

“Stiles, your hearts going crazy, calm down.” Derek squeezed his knee, and Stiles took a breath. “We’re going to fix this.” 

 

“Yeah,” Stiles nodded again, half believing it this time. “Yeah, Lucinda will know what to do.” 

 

\-- 

 

Lucinda did not, in fact, know what to do. In fact she stared at Stiles with increasing levels of bewilderment as he explained the situation to her. When he finished, she cocked her head and tapped her chin, her flying squirrel sat on top of her head and also cocked her head in adorable synchrony. Then she turned around and started digging through her drawers upon drawers of herbs. 

 

“Nana, do you know what this is?” Derek asked. “Is Stiles going to be okay?” 

 

The rest of the pack all made noises of agreement, because of course the rest of the pack were here. Cora had called when they were an hour away, and Derek had told her they were meeting with Nana first thing. 

 

So, obviously, they were all sitting around Lucinda’s witch lab when they arrived. Though, to be fair, it was bigger than her last place, which they had also all piled into on several occasions. 

 

At least Stiles had only had to explain everything the once. 

 

“It’s probably another side effect of the door in Stiles mind. People are peeking through.” 

 

“I thought the meditation was supposed to fix that?” Lisa asked, reaching out to grip Stiles shoulder like she was afraid he was going to zone out and go zombie again right now. 

 

“It will probably never be fixed, not entirely. The meditation was mainly to close it enough to stop possession. Which he has done, good boy,” Lucinda called over her shoulder. Stiles blushed when Isaac and Andy both called him a good boy too, and Cora ruffled his hair. 

 

Stiles pushed them all away. 

 

Lucinda finally came back to the table, a pile of herbs in her arms, and her mortar and pestle in hand. “I’m going to make a potion for you, and the two of us are going to start meditating twice every day now. No exceptions.” 

 

“Okay,” Stiles said quietly. Cora ruffled his hair again, though this time it felt a lot more sympathetic. 

 

“What does the potion do?” Marco asked, his arms crossed as he watched Lucinda add herb after herb into the stone bowl. 

 

“It will help him sleep through the night, with no dreams.” 

 

“And he’ll be okay, after that?” Derek asked. Derek was still sitting beside Stiles, practically touching him. Stiles didn’t see him moving away any time soon. 

 

Lucinda pursed her lips, and her squirrel chirped. “We’ll have to wait and see.” 

 

No one liked that response, but there wasn’t anything else they could do about it. A few minutes later, Lucinda handed over a bag full of fine powder. She told him to mix it in with boiling powder half an hour before he planned to go to sleep. She would make him more tomorrow if it worked. 

 

Stiles nodded, taking the bag and giving her his thanks. 

 

The whole pack stepped outside after that, everyone taking a moment to touch Stiles in some way before heading off to their own homes. Lucinda hugged him before going back inside. Cora ran a hand over his shoulders. Marco pulled him into a sideways embrace before following after his mate towards the big house. Andy squeezed his arm as he walked passed, and then Lisa, Isaac, Derek and Stiles were all standing there, Charlie running through the flowers beside them. 

 

“We had plans…” Isaac said, glancing at Lisa before turning back to Stiles. “Nevermind, we’re here for you, buddy. Thanks for telling us what’s going on.” 

 

“What plans?” Stiles asked, looking between them suspiciously. 

 

“Isaac asked me to go to Hawaii with him,” Lisa said, unable to suppress a grin as she turned to look at her boyfriend. “We booked everything yesterday.” 

 

Stiles had a wild guess for what Isaac had planned for during this trip. “Well damn, guys, don’t let my problems stop you! Go to Hawaii!” 

 

“No, no, you’re dreaming about dead people, Stiles, we should stay.” Lisa said, pulling him into a hug. 

 

Stiles snorted, “I appreciate the concern, but seriously, I’ll be fine. Lucinda’s on the case, right? I’m sure this potion will work. When are you going?” 

 

“Next weekend.” Isaac said. “But we can seriously cancel if-” 

 

“Dude, take your girlfriend to Hawaii,” Stiles said over Lisa’s shoulder, giving Isaac a knowing look. Isaac grinned sheepishly at him. 

 

Yep, they were totally getting engaged in Hawaii next week. 

 

“If you’re sure…” 

 

“He’s sure.” Derek cut in, “have fun in Hawaii. We’ll be fine here.” 

 

Both Isaac and Lisa relaxed, before Stiles suddenly found himself tugged into a hug between both of them. 

 

“Come to the big house for dinner?” Lisa asked, pulling away. 

 

“Where else would we go?” Stiles laughed. 

 

“Good point. Neither of them know how to cook,” Isaac said. Derek shoved him away. 

 

“We’ll see you guys soon, we just need to go unpack our stuff.” 

 

“Okay,” they said in unison, before joining hands and making their way towards the house. Stiles and Derek watched them go, before taking each others hands and walking in the other direction. 

 

“You really think this tea will work?” Stiles asked. 

 

“Yeah,” Derek said, without any hesitation. “I’m sure it will work.” 

 

\-- 

 

Dinner with the pack went as it always does. Marco and Andy told stories about their customers that day, most of whom were old ladies trying to ‘spice up their life’. Lisa complained about the idiots in Oregon, though there are fewer idiots here than in New York, as a paramedic, she sees more than the average person. Today, she saw three separate cases of broken arms caused by children trying to climb trees and their parents _ letting them _ . 

 

Idiots. 

 

Isaac spent most of the dinner raptly watching Lisa as she complained, before Izzy dragged him into a story about her day finger painting art for the new baby’s room. Cora and Lucinda talked about remodeling the barn, and what Cora’s going to do when the new baby arrived. 

 

The only difference was today, everyone kept shooting Stiles worried looks when they thought he wasn’t looking.  Which, most of the time, he wasn’t. Stiles was quiet, and spent most of the dinner staring down at his own plate. 

 

But Derek noticed the looks. 

 

Derek noticed that Izzy and Isaac tried to convince Stiles to come finger painting with them after dinner, only to be given a blank look and a small shake of the head in response. Derek saw Lisa and Cora completely fail to get Stiles attention when they tried to bring in dessert. 

 

Derek watched as Nana pulled Stiles out of the room after dinner, telling everyone they were going to go meditate. 

 

Derek sighed when all eyes turned to him when the door closed behind them. 

 

“You said he was doing better, what happened?” Cora said first, pushing her plate to the side. 

 

“I don’t know,” Derek propped his elbows on the table so he could bury his face in his hands. “He’s barely talked to me about this, you all know as much as I do.” 

 

“Well… he’s probably pretty scared, right?” Isaac said. “I mean, I would be scared if I started seeing dead people.” 

 

“It depends on what dead people you see.” Marco said, before rising to his feet and starting to collect the dishes. The pack followed, and soon they had a sink full of soapy water, and a clear table. They all stayed close by though, as Derek and Andy finished washing the dishes. 

 

“He mentioned seeing his mom,” Derek said, breaking the silence they had been working in. Isaac and Cora made pained noises of understanding. 

 

Quite a few members of the pack understood what it was like, to miss your mother. 

 

“Did he… has he seen anyone else?” Cora asked. Derek shook his head. 

 

“All we can do is be here for him. He’ll come to us when he needs it, he always does.” Marco said. 

 

Lisa and Isaac exchanged a look. 

 

“Maybe we should-” Lisa started to say, but Derek cut her off. 

 

“Go to Hawaii. You would only make Stiles feel worse by staying here.” Derek said, giving Lisa a sharp look as he unplugged the sink. He dried his hands on a tea towel as he watched Lisa and Isaac make another face at each other. 

 

“But-” Isaac started. 

 

“Go to Hawaii,” Marco said, grabbing the back of Isaac’s neck and giving it a squeeze. “I am proud and honoured to have a pack that want to be there for each other, but you have to continue to live your own lives as well. Go. Enjoy yourselves. Stiles will be fine.” 

 

“If you’re sure…” Lisa said, her eyes turning to Cora. “I know we planned it suddenly, and you’re due dates not that far away-” 

 

“Lisa!” Cora laughed, “you guys are literally only going to be gone for a week!” 

 

“I know, I just… have a bad feeling about this,” Lisa reached up and grabbed the beads around her neck, the beads that Nana had given her last year for luck and safety. Derek felt a wave of unease go through him at the gesture. 

 

He ignored it. 

 

“Stiles…” He cleared his throat awkwardly when his voice caught on the word. “Stiles has been through a lot, but he’s made it through it all. He’s going to be okay.” 

 

“Yeah,” Andy said, drying off the last plate. “Stiles is a badass, he can beat anything.” 

 

Isaac snorted, raising a hand apologetically when they all turned to look at him. “Sorry, it’s just… sometimes it weirds me out, when Andy says stuff like that. Cause yeah, Stiles has proven that he can beat anything, but also, Stiles was that stupid kid in first grade who had to go to the hospital because he got three different crayons stuck up his nose.” 

 

“Three?” Derek asked, pained. 

 

“Jackson told he could only fit one.” 

 

“Of course.” Derek said, deadpan. Everyone laughed. 

 

“I can see why that would be strange,” Lisa said, “it is strange to be that all of you look up to Marco as our great and all knowing Alpha. When I look at him, all I see is the kid who thought he could fly if he taped feathers to his arms. The poor boy spent an entire summer inside once, healing from jumping off the roof.” 

 

“An entire summer?” Andy asked, “but you’re a werewolf.” 

 

Marco gave him a sheepish smile, “I thought if I had enough feathers, it would work.” 

 

“He jumped about ten times before we finally got through to him that it wouldn’t work.” Lisa said, laughing at the memory. 

 

Everyone laughed along, easing the tension that had been building through dinner. They made their way to the living room as their laughter died down. They all sat down between the couch and the arm chairs. Izzy sprawled out on the floor, happily playing with Charlie. 

 

Derek sat beside Cora, knowing full well that he would be used as a body pillow as the woman leaned back to offer her feet to her husband, who obligingly started to rub them. Cora hummed happily, running a hand over her pregnant belly. 

 

“You two were meant to be,” Derek said, smirking at his sister when she looked at him in confusion. “Cora convinced herself she could fly too.” 

 

“What? No I didn’t.” 

 

“You did. When you were four you watched a cartoon with Wonder Woman in it and convinced yourself that since you also had super strength like her, you could also fly like her. Mom only let you jump off the roof once though…. Not that she let you do it in the first place, Laura got into a lot of trouble for that.” 

 

“I don’t remember that.” Cora said quietly, frowning down at her round stomach. The rest of the pack grew quiet when they picked up on her melancholy. The unease Derek had been feeling before slithered up his spine. 

 

“I’m sorry, I…” he didn’t know what to say though. Cora had lost their family when she was so young, it was a wonder she remembered anything about them. 

 

“Don’t be, I like to hear stories.” Cora said, shooting Derek a sad smile. “Do you think… do you think Stiles has seen anyone? From our family?” 

 

Derek sighed, “he hasn’t said anything.” 

 

“Would you want him to?” Lisa asked. Her and Isaac had curled up together on one of the big armchairs, Lisa’s head on Isaac’s shoulder, with Isaac’s fingers absently playing with her braids. 

 

“If he has to see someone, it would be better to see someone friendly, right?” Andy said, lounging in the other armchair by himself. 

 

“I would rather he didn’t see anyone at all.” Derek said. 

 

“It would be nice though, to know they’re okay. Wherever they are.” Cora said. 

 

Derek didn’t think he agreed with that, but he didn’t want to argue. Isaac was nodding his head along with Cora, and even Lisa was looking thoughtful at the idea. They had all lost people. They all thought of their family members, pack members… Erica and Boyd.

 

But Derek wasn’t willing to risk Stiles just for a chance to speak with the people they had lost. Stiles was his priority now, and always. He couldn’t change anything for those who were already gone anyway. He couldn’t help them even if he wanted to. 

 

“Stiles is going to take the tea tonight, and that will be the end of it.” Derek said. 

 

“But if the tea doesn’t work?” Cora said, “maybe he could learn to control it. Maybe he could give us all some peace of mind.” 

 

“We don’t even know if what he’s seeing is  _ real _ ,” Derek pointed out. Andy and Lisa agreed with him, but Cora and Isaac looked doubtful. Derek felt his chest tighten when they exchanged a look. 

 

“It doesn’t matter if what he is seeing is real or not. Nor does it matter if we want him to see someone in particular. I doubt there is a way to control it, even if you asked him.” Marco said, putting an end to their disagreement before it had fully begun. “What  _ matters _ is that Stiles is our packmate, and he’s hurting because of this. If he wants our help to stop it, we’ll find a way to put a stop to it.” 

 

A silence fell over the group, until Izzy let out a whine. Cora sat up and Izzy ran to her, crawling onto the couch to wedge herself between her parents. 

 

“You’re right, Marco,” Cora said, running a hand over Izzy’s hair. “I’m sorry Derek, you’re right. Stiles is what’s important here, I don’t know what I was thinking.” 

 

Derek squeezed her shoulder. “You were thinking about our family. I get it, I miss them too.” 

 

Cora leaned into him again, and the pack eventually drifted on to another, lighter, topic. Derek wasn’t paying much attention anymore though. 

 

All he could think about was Stiles, and how he hoped the tea would work. 

 

\-- 

 

By the time Derek left the big house, it was dark out. He followed the path to their small cottage, pausing every now and then to let Charlie sniff the bushes, and pee on the trees. When he neared the cabin, he picked up Stiles heartbeat from inside. He smiled, relieved that it sounded sturdy and strong. 

 

Stiles was sitting at the table when he walked in, his fingers playing with a pile of sand in front of him. 

 

“Hey.” Stiles said, not looking up. 

 

“Hey.” 

 

Charlie huffed at them before trotting over to the dog bed they kept out here and curling up. 

 

“How was meditating?” Derek asked as he slipped off his shoes and hung up his jacket. Stiles shrugged as Derek sat down across from him. He looked tired and wrung out. Derek wanted to wrap him up and protect him from all of this, but he didn’t think he could… holding Stiles wouldn’t protect him from this nightmare. 

 

“Lucinda thinks this should work.” Stiles said, motioning to the bag of herbs sitting in the middle of the table. “She said my mind is mostly closed now, and this should keep all dreams at bay as I sleep.” 

 

“What do you think?” 

 

Stiles sighed, letting go of the sand and leaning back in the chair. “Does it matter? She’s the witch here, not me.” 

 

“Of course. It always matters.” 

 

Stiles bit his lip, before letting it go and letting out a hollow laugh. “I don’t think this will work, because I don’t think these are dreams.” Stiles looked up at him then, and he looked terrified. “I don’t know what the fuck this is, Derek, and I don’t think Lucinda does either.” 

 

Derek’s chair scraped against the wood as he stood up to get to Stiles as fast as he could. He pulled Stiles head against his chest and held him there as Stiles fought to keep his breathing under control. 

 

“It’s okay we’ll- we’ll figure it out. We always do.” 

 

“Derek,” Stiles whispered against his sweater, “I’m scared.” 

 

“I know. I know you are, baby,” Derek whispered back, clutching to every part of Stiles he could reach. “I’m right here, I’m not going anywhere.” 

 

Derek listened as Stiles managed to get his breathing back to normal. He listened as his heartbeat slowed, and his shaking subsided. He only stepped back when the death grip Stiles had on his shirt loosened. 

 

Stiles stepped up into his space as he moved back, pushing their chests together and pressing his mouth against Derek’s lips. Derek got the hint. He grabbed Stiles hips, pulling him up high enough for Stiles to wrap his legs around Derek’s waist. 

 

It wasn’t long before they were in the bed, their clothes thrown carelessly on the floor beside them. Derek was gentle as he rocked their bodies together. He cupped a hand over Stiles head, curled his fingers around Stiles hip. It was Stiles who reached down to grab both their cocks, working them both together. 

 

Derek leaned forward to whisper I love you’s into the skin of Stiles neck, pressing his mouth right under his ear. 

 

Stiles grabbed at Derek’s back and moaned out his name when he came. Derek rutted against Stiles stomach, using his come as lube to reach his own climax only a few moments later. 

 

He turned onto his side afterward but didn’t let go. They curled around each other, pressed chest to chest, forehead to forehead. 

 

In a moment, Derek would get up to get a wet cloth to clean them both off. After that, Stiles would have to make the tea that was supposed to help him sleep. 

 

But for now, they lay here together, holding each other close in the dark. 

 

\-- 

 

Stiles tapped the edge of the mug nervously. The tea hadn’t tasted as bad as he thought it would, but it wasn’t great… that wasn’t why he didn’t want to drink it though. 

 

“Do you think it will put me to sleep? Maybe I could just… not sleep tonight.” 

 

Derek raised a brow at him. Stiles sighed and finished off the mug. 

 

“If it doesn’t help, we’ll try something else,” Derek said, taking the mug from him and shoving Stiles back into the bed. 

 

The bastard knew Stiles wasn’t going to lie down willingly. 

 

“Maybe we should-” 

 

“Just close your eyes,” Derek said, stupidly calm. Like always. “I’ll be back in a minute, okay? And I’ll be right beside you all night. I’ll wake you up if you look like your having a dream.” 

 

Derek left the room to get himself ready for bed, and Stiles closed his eyes and gnawed on his lips. Lucinda had never let him down before, so he didn’t know why he was freaking out so much about this…this time it just felt like it wouldn’t work. 

 

And if it didn’t work, he didn’t know what, or who, he would be seeing tonight. 

 

He hoped it wasn’t Theo. Or Kate. 

 

The bed dipped beside him, a strong familiar arm curled around Stiles waist and pulled him back. Stiles pushed himself back against Derek’s chest. 

 

“You promise you’ll wake me up?” Stiles hated that his voice shook. He loved Derek even more, though, for not mentioning it. His boyfriend simply nuzzled against the back of his neck. 

 

“I promise. I love you. Now, sleep.” 

 

“I love you too.” 

 

Derek rumbled behind him. His chest vibrated with it, and for a moment Stiles felt like he was curled up with a large purring cat rather than a werewolf. He wondered if this was what it felt like to cuddle a lion. 

 

Charlie hopped up onto the bed then, wiggling his way under the duvet and in between Stiles arms. 

 

Lying here, between his two boys, Stiles closed his eyes, and fell asleep. 

 

\-- 

 

“Fuck.” 

 

The room was white, everything was white, yada yada yada, why the  _ fuck _ was he back  _ here _ ? 

 

“The tea was supposed to work!” Stiles shouted into the void, kicking his foot out at nothing. 

 

“What tea?” The void asked back. 

 

Stiles twisted, grimacing when he saw Allison floating there, watching him with concern. 

 

“Nothing, just… I drank some tea before bed, that’s all.” 

 

“Tea that was supposed to do something.” 

 

Stiles sighed, running a hand over his face. “Yeah, but, don’t worry about it, okay? How are you doing, have you seen your Mom?” 

 

Allison looked him over, before stepping closer. A second later she was right in his face. “This isn’t nothing, Stiles, you’re clearly upset… is it the pack? Is everyone okay? Is Scott-” 

 

“Everyone is fine. Everyone out in,” Stiles gestured vaguely behind him, “they’re all fine.” 

 

Allison frowned at him, “but you’re not.” 

 

“I’m…” Stiles turned away. He hadn’t really considered Allison when he planned to stop coming here, and now he felt like a giant dickwad. What’s he supposed to tell her now, that he had planned to never come back without saying goodbye? Without giving her any closure, again?

 

“Stiles, what’s going on?” 

 

“I drank some tea that was supposed to stop me from coming here,” Stiles said, turning back to see her reaction. Her face was carefully blank though. Even in death, she had better control than him. “It wasn’t… you’re not the only one I see in here. I couldn’t- I  _ can’t _ see them again, Allison. I’m trying to find a way to not come back here.” 

 

Smooth, Stiles. Real smooth. 

 

“But… what about me?” Allison asked, a flicker of betrayal crossing her face. “How are you going to get me out of here if you don’t come in here for me?” 

 

It was at this moment that Stiles realized he really should have planned out what he was going to say to Allison when the topic of her regaining life again inevitably came back up. Of course, he hadn’t. He hadn’t thought about her at all. 

 

Like the biggest, grossest dickwad, to ever have dicked. 

 

“Look, Allison, I don’t know how to tell you this but… there isn’t a way to get you out of this. You’re dead.” 

 

“I know I’m dead!” Allison snapped back. Stiles was kind of relieved, to be honest, he thought maybe she hadn’t clued into that part. “But you and the pack are supposed to bring me back, now that you know where I am! Scott wouldn’t let you give up on me like this, he wouldn’t! Your going against your Alpha!” 

 

“Okay, first of all, I  _ don’t _ know where you are!” Stiles gestured wildly at all the nothing around them. “I come here when I’m supposed to be sleeping, I have no idea what this is, or how to get anyone, let alone myself, in or out of it, okay? And second of all, Scott is not my Alpha anymore, Allison. I’m sorry. But  _ my _ Alpha agrees that these dreams should stop.” 

 

Allison stared at him in shock, her hand coming up to cover her gaping mouth. “You abandoned Scott?” 

 

“Oh my god,” Stiles rolled his eyes. “I didn’t abandon- I left to protect myself.” 

 

“You left Beacon Hills, your pack, your  _ family _ , to join another pack? What possible reason could there be to do that, Stiles? I never thought that you of all people would leave Scott like that. How could you?” Allison spoke through clenched teeth, her eyes shining with tears. 

 

Stiles was too tired to do this right now. He shrugged, “a lot changed after you died. Scott and I...“ Stiles swallowed past the lump in his throat. “We grew apart. Other things got in between us. The rest of the pack left too. The only ones left are Liam and Mason.” 

 

“Who?” 

 

“Oh right, uh, Scott bit a kid about a year after you… his name was Liam. He’s Scott’s beta.” 

 

Allison laughed at him, “Scott would never bite an innocent kid. You’re lying.” 

 

“Well in his defense, it was kind of an accident. Funny story, actually. You see, Liam was falling off a roof, and-” 

 

“Did you even tell Scott about me? Or Isaac? Or my  _ dad _ ? Have you been lying this whole time?” 

 

Stiles bit his lip, before he slowly shook his head. “I didn’t want to hurt Scott anymore than… your death was really hard on him.” Allison turned away from him, making a noise of disgust. “I did tell Isaac about it… I don’t know if he told your dad… I didn’t lie about how they were doing, though. They’re all okay.” 

 

Allison scoffed at him, “like you could tell Isaac something without Scott finding out.” 

 

“Right, uh,” Stiles twisted his fingers together, “well, Isaac’s in my pack, and Scott’s not, so... “ 

 

“You and Isaac are in a pack together, outside of Scott and Beacon Hills, really? You barely got along in Beacon Hills. Your story is ridiculous, Stiles, just admit that you’re being extremely selfish and you would rather get your beauty sleep than help me!” 

 

“It’s not that I won’t help you, it’s that I can’t. Your body is in the ground, there’s nothing for you to come back to.” 

 

Allison’s mouth opened, but no sound came out. She probably hadn’t thought of that. 

 

“Even if we found you another body, it would be possession, Allison. You would be taking over another person’s life. You wouldn’t be  _ you _ anymore. The Allison I knew wouldn’t want that.” 

 

“Right,” Allison laughed darkly, “and you know all about possession, don’t you, Stiles? That is how you killed me, after all.” 

 

Stiles felt his heart stop at the words. 

 

“No, I-” but between one blink and the next, she was gone. 

 

And Theo stood in her place. 

 

“My, my, you’re not looking so good, Stiles.” Theo said, smarmy smirk all over his face. 

 

Stiles thought he might vomit. 

 

Theo stepped up to him, but Stiles shoved him back. He twisted away and tried to run. “Derek! Derek, wake me up!” 

 

Nothing happened. Theo laughed at him. 

 

“Derek!” Stiles screamed. Theo grabbed his arm and twisted, shoving Stiles down to his knees. “No, no, no, NO.” Stiles shoved, sending Theo flying back again. 

 

“Derek, please!” Stiles yelled again, but he knew it was hopeless. He staggered to his feet and ran. 

 

It was the only thing he could do, while trapped in this white nothingness. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: talk of nightmares/dreaming about dead people  
> in the last scene, Stiles gets into a fight with Theo.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some pack feels for you all :) 
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Warnings: Stiles has a panic attack

 

Derek lay awake most of the night, and jerked awake at every sound when he did sleep. But Stiles slept peacefully in his arms the entire time, and Derek felt something in him relax. 

 

It was working. 

 

Or at least, that’s what he thought… 

 

Stiles jerked awake to the sound of their alarm at seven, his heart raising and his breath coming in broken gasps. Derek didn’t know what to do other than drag him further into his arms, hitting the alarm distractedly behind his back. 

 

“It’s okay, it’s okay, you’re fine,” Derek whispered, rocking his mate, who cried into Derek’s chest. Derek had no idea what was happening. Less than a minute ago Stiles had been fine, he had been peacefully asleep and now… 

 

Now he was sobbing in Derek’s arms. 

 

It didn’t take a genius to figure out what Stiles had just woken up from, and Derek felt like a complete idiot. He had been here all night, lying beside his mate. He was supposed to be protecting him. He should have woken him up halfway through the night to check. He should have known Stiles was in danger. 

 

Now all he could do was run a soothing hand down Stiles back, and whisper calming words in his ear. He was useless. 

 

It took a long time for Stiles to calm down. Charlie managed to wiggle his way in between them before Stiles finally pulled back, wiping his nose with the back of his hand. He took a steady breath before he looked Derek dead in the eye and said, “I am never taking that tea again.” 

 

“Okay,” Derek replied easily. He agreed 100%, if this is what the tea did to Stiles. 

 

“I don’t- I can’t-” Stiles took a breath, “I couldn’t get out.” 

 

“I didn’t know,” Derek ran a hand over Stiles head, “your heart was fine, you weren’t moving, I thought you were fine. I didn’t know.” 

 

Stiles nodded, “I figured, when you didn’t wake me up.” 

 

“I’m sorry.” 

 

“Hey,” Stiles said, softly. He leaned forward to kiss the corner of Derek’s mouth. “None of that. This isn’t your fault. I don’t know what I would do without you, waking up to have you here… that’s everything, to me.” 

 

Derek pulled Stiles closer to him, ignoring Charlie’s unhappy grumbling. 

 

“We have to talk to Lucinda,” Stiles said, even as he curled his fingers into Derek’s pajama shirt. 

 

Derek knew that. But for now, he thought the best thing was for the both of them to catch their breath, together. 

 

They would deal with their problems later. 

 

\-- 

 

Nana was not happy that the tea didn’t work. She looked into Stiles' eyes, his ears, and made him move his tongue around in his mouth before she was satisfied that he had taken it, and it hadn’t worked. 

 

Then she walked away to make a few calls. 

 

“I’m sure she’ll find something,” Derek said, squeezing Stiles' shoulder. Stiles didn’t reply, but he did lean into Derek’s touch. 

 

“What can we do to help?” Cora asked, watching Stiles with concern. “Do you want us to, um, meditate with you? Would that help?” 

 

Stiles shook his head, “no, it would probably just distract me. But thanks.” 

 

Cora sighed sadly, moving forward to run a hand over Stiles hair. “We’re here for you.” 

 

“I know,” Stiles smiled at her. He looked tired. 

 

“Maybe we should cancel our-” 

 

“You’re going to Hawaii.”  Stiles cut Lisa off before she finished her sentence. “Then you’re coming back and telling me all about it.” 

 

“Okay.” Lisa sighed, brushing a hand over Stiles forehead. “Try to get some rest though, alright? Even if it’s not sleep. And drink plenty of water.” 

 

“We’re not leaving for a few more days, Nana might have it all figured out before we even go,” Isaac said. He was leaning against the far wall, arms crossed and looking indifferent. Derek could see the way he watched Stiles intently though. He wasn’t fooling anyone here with his aloof act. He hadn’t for years. 

 

But Stiles was avoiding Isaac’s eyes this morning, and it was making Isaac fall back into his old habits. Derek could only guess as to who Stiles had seen last night. 

 

“We can only hope Nana will figure it out. In the meantime though, we will do what we can. I don’t want Stiles to be alone, not when he is like this.” Marco said. 

 

“I’ll be with him,” Derek said, curling a protective arm around Stiles waist. 

 

“I know, but if he wants to continue on with his normal life. Stiles works at the restaurant. You work odd construction jobs. You don’t need to take on this burden by yourself, Derek.” Marco gave Derek’s shoulder a squeeze. 

 

Derek didn’t like it, but he nodded in agreement. 

 

“I’ll keep an eye on him at the restaurant,” Andy said, reaching over to gently punch Stiles arm. “I usually do anyway.” 

 

Stiles grinned at him, but he didn’t say anything. Everyone noticed the silence. 

 

“We will all try to keep Stiles in mind, at the restaurant and at home. And I will call around as well, perhaps my parents have heard of something like this before,” Marco said, following after Lisa and Cora to brush a hand over Stiles head, stopping to squeeze the back of his neck for a moment before he stepped away. “We’ll figure this out, Stiles.” 

 

“Thanks, Marco.” 

 

The room fell into an awkward silence after that. Not even the wolves could hear Nana in the next room, so no one knew if she was going to be heading back. 

 

Stiles was getting stiffer and stiffer under Derek’s arm. He looked over at Lisa and Cora and motion to Stiles with his head. Lisa, thankfully, clued in. 

 

“Maybe we should get out of here. How about a movie day, huh? Curl up on the couch, watch some  _ Die Hard _ maybe?” 

 

“You guys never want to watch  _ Die Hard _ ,” Stiles said suspiciously. His shoulders were loosening up, though, so Derek took it as a win. 

 

“I’d prefer  _ Die Hard _ to  _ Finding Nemo _ for the hundredth time,” Isaac said with a smirk. 

 

“Yeah.” Stiles didn’t smile back. He didn’t even look at Isaac. Isaac looked disheartened when Stiles walked out of the room without saying anything else. 

 

Derek waited for Cora and Lisa to take Stiles between them, both looping an arm through his as they walked back to the big house. Andy and Marco trailed after them, Izzy on Marco’s shoulders and Charlie at Andy’s heels. 

 

Derek and Isaac hung back until they were sure Stiles couldn’t hear them. 

 

“What’s going on? Did I do something?” Isaac asked. 

 

Derek sighed, “no… I don’t think so. I think it has something to do with what happened last night. I don’t know who he dreamed about, he won’t tell me.” 

 

Isaac drew back at that, looking scared, “do you think it was my dad?” 

 

“I don’t know. He did this to me too, for a while, in Beacon Hills. I don’t know who he saw there either, and he stopped looking like he was going to cry at the sight of me after a day or so…” Derek shoved his hands into his jacket, “I wish I knew how to help him with this.” 

 

“I wish he knew he could talk to us about it.” 

 

“He probably thinks he’s protecting us.” 

 

Isaac scoffed, “protecting us from people who are already gone? My dad can’t hurt me anymore. I’d prefer Stiles just told me so we could go back to how we usually are.” 

 

Derek gave him a dubious look, “you think that, but would your really? We don’t know what was said. We don’t know… words can hurt, Isaac. And yeah, of course I want Stiles to talk to us about it, but I get it. It’s not something to take lightly.” 

 

Isaac kicked a stray rock off the path, “yeah, I guess.” 

 

“Let’s just give him the day. We’re all weirded out by this. Maybe after a day of pack bonding over movies, we’ll feel better.” 

 

Isaac bumped his shoulder against Derek’s, smiling when Derek bumped back. 

 

“When did you get all wise?” 

 

“I didn’t get wise,” Derek said, “I just got old.” 

 

Isaac laughed, before shoving Derek off balance and taking off at a run. “Race you to the kitchen, old man! Last one there has to make all the popcorn!” 

 

Derek growled when he took off after Isaac, but everyone could tell it was playful. 

 

\-- 

 

The day went by slowly. Stiles curled up in the middle of the couch and didn’t move. Charlie sat in his lap at first, but halfway through the first  _ Die Hard _ he got up to roll on the floor with Izzy. The rest of the pack rotated who got to sit beside Stiles. Cora and Lisa started, with Derek at Stiles' feet, a hand looped around his ankle. 

 

After the first movie they had a lunch break, Marco pulling out ingredients to make homemade pizzas- something that was usually Stiles favorite. Stiles smiled and put his usual toppings on, but everyone could tell his heart wasn’t in it. He didn’t stay to watch the cheese melt like he usually did, instead going back to the couch as soon as his work was finished. 

 

Derek and Andy sat beside Stiles after that, as they put in  _ Wreck-It Ralph _ . Isaac tried to sit where Derek had sat on the floor by Stiles' feet, but Stiles curled up into a ball when Isaac tried to touch him. Derek knew that Isaac was hurt by the movement, but he did well in not showing it. 

 

Nana walked in as the movie was ending. She was holding a tea bag. 

 

“No.” Stiles said as soon as he saw her. Derek moved his hand up to Stiles neck, holding him reassuringly. Stiles didn’t soften under Derek’s touch. “I’m not drinking that tea again.” 

 

“This is different,” Nana said, gingerly putting the bag on the table. “This one will keep the dreams at bay, but it won’t keep you asleep. You’ll be able to wake up.” 

 

“I’m not taking it. I-” Stiles ran a shaky hand through his hair, the rest of the pack watched him with concern. “I can’t do this.” 

 

Stiles was up and out of Derek’s reach before Derek could react. When he moved to follow after him, he felt a hand pull him back. 

 

“I have to go-” 

 

“Let me.” 

 

Derek turned to Isaac in surprise. 

 

“I’ll talk to him.” 

 

Derek narrowed his eyes, then turned back to the door Stiles had walked through. He could still hear Stiles heartbeat, quick and erratic. “If you’re not back in twenty minutes, I’m coming after you.” 

 

“Fair enough,” Isaac said, slipping past him. 

 

Derek sat down on the couch, but he didn’t take his eyes off the door. He wouldn’t until Stiles walked back through them. 

 

\-- 

 

Stiles pushed through the back door, gasping in lungfuls of air that didn’t seem to be doing anything. He stopped a few feet from the house, unceremoniously sitting down in the middle of the lawn. It didn’t help. 

 

He still couldn’t breathe. 

 

He grabbed at his hair, pulling and pulling and pulling, hoping the sting would help, would bring him back. He just needed to  _ breathe _ . 

 

“Hey, hey, enough of that.” Hands were on his wrists, fingers were uncurling his, moving them away from his hair. Usually that helped, usually that made him pause, take a breath, but this time was different. This time it wasn’t Derek stopping him. “Breathe, buddy,” Isaac said, “I’ve got you. Breathe with me.” 

 

He couldn’t. He  _ couldn’t _ . Isaac was here, and all Stiles could see was Allison’s dead eyes, accusing him of her death. Isaac should know. They should all  _ know _ . Stiles had talked to her, countless times, and hadn’t told anybody. Allison’s pain was all his  _ fault _ . 

 

“Hey,” Isaac said, more sharply this time. “Listen to me, Stiles, you have to  _ breathe _ .” Isaac placed a hand on his chest, and Stiles managed to pull in a breath. “Good. Again.” 

 

He did it again. Twice more, ten times, finally he had enough breath in him to look at Isaac in the eye and whisper, “I’m sorry.” 

 

“Nothing to be sorry for, man, just keep breathing.” 

 

“No, no, I’m sorry for,” Stiles pulled away, put some space between them. “I’m sorry for Allison.” 

 

Isaac looked at him in confusion. “We’ve already talked about this, Stiles, none of that was your fault.” 

 

Stiles looked down, looked at his raw fingernails and his shaking hands. He was a fucking mess. “Allison disagrees.” 

 

Isaac reared back, “what?” 

 

Stiles shrugged, sticking his already chewed down thumb into his mouth to gnaw on anyway. What did it matter, at this point? All of his dreams were about the dead. He was pretty sure that meant he was going to joining them shortly. Otherwise, what else would all of this fucking mean? 

 

“You talked to her?” Isaac was blinking, like he couldn’t grasp this new knowledge. 

 

“Yeah. A few times.” 

 

“And she… told you her dying was your fault?” 

 

“Well, yeah, it kind of was - “ 

 

“That’s  _ bullshit _ .” Isaac hissed. Stiles looked up at him in surprise. Isaac grabbed his hand, pulling his thumb out of his mouth. “Is this why you’ve been acting weird around me all day? And why you just tried to chew your own thumb off.” 

 

Stiles shifted awkwardly, “partially.” 

 

“Alright, well, let’s be clear about this then. Allison’s death was not your fault. And I feel pretty confident saying that because I was  _ there _ , and you were  _ not _ . You didn’t see her die. You had nothing to do with it, got it? It was the Nogitsune, and you were as much of a victim to him as Allison was.” 

 

Isaac was watching him fiercely as Stiles worked that through his mind. Finally, he nodded and Isaac relaxed. 

 

“What else did Allison say?” 

 

“She asked about the pack… about you. I told her you were all doing well, and that we missed her, but…that’s not all she wanted from me.” 

 

Isaac frowned in confusion, “what did she want?” 

 

“She wanted me to tell you all about her, so that we could find a way to save her. To get her out of the weird limbo place she’s stuck in.” 

 

“Oh…” 

 

“Last night she found out I didn’t want to keep going back there. She figured out that I wasn’t trying to find a way to save her, and… she got really mad.” 

 

“But how would we save her? She’s already dead.” 

 

Stiles shrugged, “find a way to bring her back? I don’t know. I tried to tell her that there wasn’t a way to do it without hurting someone else. Her body is already gone, but Allison didn’t… I don’t know, she disappeared pretty soon after that.” 

 

Isaac grimaced, but he reached over to wrap a hand on Stiles' shoulder. “I’m sure she’ll understand, after a bit of time. The Allison we knew and loved wouldn’t want to hurt anyone.” 

 

Stiles smirked, “that’s what I said. She didn’t take that so well.” 

 

“It takes time, to accept things. Especially things like the death of someone you love. I can’t imagine what accepting your own death is like, but… I know how much it sucks, accepting the death of your family.” 

 

Stiles rolled forward and grabbed Isaac in a hug. Sometimes he forgot how much shit this lanky jerk had gone through. “I haven’t seen any of them. I’m sorry.” 

 

“Not your fault,” Isaac said, hugging back. “If you do see my dad though, maybe, uh, run the other way. He can be a bit violent.” 

 

“There isn’t really anywhere to run.” Stiles said before he could stop himself. Isaac pulled away and looked at him, worry edged across his face. 

 

“What the hell does that mean?” 

 

Stiles bit his lip, he tried to pull away more but Isaac stopped him. “ _ Stiles _ .” 

 

“There was… I saw some people last night that weren’t the nicest people. I couldn’t get away from them.” 

 

“Oh my God.” Isaac gripped Stiles arms tightly, looking him over like Stiles had actually been seriously injured in his dreams. “Holy shit, are you okay? Who was it?” 

 

Stiles winced. “Theo and…”

 

Isaac’s brow furrowed, “and?” 

 

“And Kate Argent.” 

 

Isaac and Stiles stared at each other for a moment, Isaac’s hands clenched protectively around Stiles arms. 

 

Then a door clicked shut behind them. 

 

“Shit.” Isaac said, moving to stand. “Derek-” 

 

“You saw Kate?” 

 

Stiles winced, turning to see Derek standing by the back door. His face was blanked out with a scowl… so, his usual mask for when things got too personal for him. 

 

Stiles wished he could have stopped this conversation from ever happening. 

 

“Yeah, I saw her.” 

 

“Did she say anything to you?” 

 

“No.” 

 

A corner of Derek’s mouth twitched down. “You’re lying.” 

 

Stiles clenched his jaw, moving to stand up beside Isaac. “She likes to talk, to brag, but she hasn’t said anything I didn’t already know. She’s a giant annoying bitch, I try to ignore her.” 

 

Derek didn’t look happy about it, but he seemed to relax at Stiles words. “Did she hurt you?” 

 

“Nothing I couldn’t handle.” 

 

“That’s not what I asked.” Derek moved up into his space, cupping Stiles cheek in his hand, “I hate that I can’t protect you, in there.” 

 

“I hate that I can’t get out.” 

 

Derek pulled him in, hugging him close. Stiles felt Isaac join the hug, sandwiching Stiles in between them. 

 

“We’ll figure it out.” They promise him. Stiles wished it could be that easy. 

 

He knew it wouldn’t be. 

 

\-- 

 

When they got back inside, Stiles took the teabag and slipped it into his pocket. “I’m not saying I’ll drink it. But I will take it home with me… just in case.” 

 

Lucinda pulled him into a hug, “you do what you have to do, my dear. I’ll keep looking into it on my end.” 

 

“Thanks, Lucinda.” 

 

Lucinda hummed happily, before patting his back and pulling away. She left soon after to make a few calls. The rest of the pack sat around the living room awkwardly, all of their attention on Stiles, but also all trying to look anywhere but him. 

 

Honestly, they were about as subtle as a brick to the face. 

 

“I think I’ll go for a run, get some of my energy out before my afternoon meditation. Anyone want to come with?” 

 

He snorted when they all spoke over each other to volunteer. Stiles rolled his eyes fondly at his pack, “we can all go.” 

 

It was a bit chaotic. The trails weren’t designed for more than two people at a time, and everyone wanted to run as close to Stiles as possible, but it worked. Izzy even got to join in, running on all fours in her beta form. 

 

They didn’t run fast, or even well, but it was good. Stiles felt like he could breathe better by the time they finished his usual route. He smiled as Derek pulled him into his side and stuck his nose into his hair. 

 

He squawked in surprise when all of the other wolves tried to do the same. 

 

“Get out of here, you crazy puppies,” Stiles said, playfully shoving Andy out of his way. “I’m not dying.” 

 

“You promise?” Lisa said, ignoring Stiles flailing arms and pulling him in close. 

 

“Yeah,” Stiles said against her warm skin. “I promise.” 

 

The rest of the pack gathered around him, forming a giant group hug. Stiles closed his eyes, and let himself feel their love. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Leave a comment to let me know what you think :)


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Halfway point! Warnings in the end notes. 
> 
>  
> 
> Thanks so much for everyone who has been reading and commenting so far! :)

Stiles plan wasn’t the best, but it worked. Or at least, it worked well enough. 

 

He set a timer for every two hours, waking himself up out of whatever fucked up situation he’d been thrown into that night. He stayed awake for at least a few minutes, before he reset the alarm and went back to sleep. If he did this all night, he avoided getting trapped, and he was able to get at least some sleep every night. 

 

It wasn’t the best sleep, or the longest, but he’d lived off of less before. He could deal with it. 

 

The only thing he really felt bad about was that Derek had to wake up every time his alarm went off too, but he didn’t seem to mind. After the third day, Derek usually just pulled Stiles against his chest whenever the alarm went off, and kept on sleeping. 

 

Stiles had to admit, the midnight cuddles were kind of nice. 

 

The days went by as usual. Derek started working on renovating the barn. Izzy and Cora supervised the work - meaning Izzy now played in the field beside the barn, occasionally helping Derek with small tasks, and Cora sat in a lounge chair and bossed Derek around while he was working. 

 

Stiles knew that Derek liked to put on a big show of complaining about it, but he also knew that Derek secretly loved the attention. Cora and Derek hadn’t been spending as much one-on-one time together since they all moved here as a pack. Now, Derek came home smiling with stories about his sister and his niece. Proving once more, that he was just a giant teddy bear in werewolf form. 

 

Isaac and Lisa left on their trip, promising to return early if anything happened. Lisa gave Stiles a full body exam before she left, to Stiles embarrassment, but she didn’t find anything wrong. Stiles and Lucinda both assured her he would be fine. 

 

If Lisa heard the lie in Stiles heartbeat when he promised her that, she didn’t say anything. She did hug Stiles for an extremely long time before leaving though. So long that the rest of the pack went back inside before Isaac and Lisa even left. Only Derek and Stiles stood outside to wave them off.

 

Stiles kept standing there after their tail lights were out of view. He didn’t know why it felt like a final goodbye. 

 

He didn’t know why he couldn’t bring himself to talk to Derek about it, either. 

 

\-- 

 

Stiles leaned forward and lay his head down on his folded arms. Fuck, he was tired. 

It had been five days since he started his alarm system to prevent his sleep time visits and it was… going. He hadn’t had to spend an entire night running away from one shitty person after the next, but… he also hadn’t been able to sleep for an entire night. 

 

So, here he sat, exhausted. 

 

He was supposed to be at the restaurant to help with the midday rush, but there wasn’t really a rush on Thursday afternoons. Besides, Andy and Sandy had turned out to be a really good team together. They tag teamed everything like pros, and Stiles really didn’t need to be here. Which is why he was huddled over the table that’s shoved into the little alcove off the kitchen, aka Andy’s ‘office’, trying to work on his new English essay. At least Charlie was happy, he got to curl up under the table and have a nice nap. 

 

Beside him his phone started to vibrate, it’s screen lit up with an incoming call. Stiles was excited for the distraction, but only for a second - because it wasn’t Derek calling him, it was Scott. 

 

Scott has been trying to talk to him ever since Stiles zoned out in his apartment. Stiles hit ignore, he couldn’t deal with that right now. 

 

Stiles groaned, shoving his phone away from him and burying his face in his hands. This was stupid. He was exhausted. Why was he even here? 

 

“How’s the essay coming?” Marco asked from behind him. Right, he was here because Marco wanted to keep an eye on him while Derek was busy with the barn. 

 

“Great. I have three whole sentences now.” Stiles said, pulling himself up and glancing over at Marco. Marco’s eyes were on his hands as he chopped up vegetables to put in the side salads. Stiles always thought it was interesting to see Marco like this - focused and alone in the kitchen. He let his wolf speed come out as he chopped a cucumber in a matter of seconds, before switching tasks and grabbing a tray out of the oven, not even bothering with oven mitts. Stiles didn’t know if it hurt him or if he was desensitized by now. Either way, he looked like a boss in the kitchen. 

 

Stiles personal favorite was when he cut up yams with his bare hands and claws. Probably against some sort of health code, but really fun to watch. 

 

Honestly, Marco’s mad cooking skills was probably the reason Little Chile was doing so well. Not that Andy wasn’t great at the business side of things too, cause the dude could do paperwork like a champ, but still, Marco’s empanadas were to  _ die _ for.

 

“Three sentences is better than nothing,” Marco said, moving to grab another cucumber. 

 

“What?” 

 

Marco glanced at him, a slight frown on his face, “your essay. Three sentences is a good start.” 

 

“Oh, right.” Jesus, he was tired. He couldn’t even keep up with his own conversation. 

 

Stiles twisted around again, pulling his laptop forward to stare at the blank screen. Maybe the Bronte sisters weren’t his thing. He’d barely read _ Jane Eyre _ , why did he choose to write about this topic? 

 

Fuck, he was tired. 

 

Stiles clicked around his college website, trying to find the list of essay topics he could choose from again. Maybe he should try Jane Austen instead, she seemed cool. 

 

“Knock, knock!” A voice called from the back. Stiles stuck his head out of the nook to see Jenny, their meat supplier and Sandy’s mother, standing in their back doorway. 

 

“Jenny! How lovely to see you, let me just go grab Andy. Or are you here for Sandy?” Marco said, already grabbing a towel to wipe off his hands. Stiles settled back into his chair, resting his head in his hand. 

 

“Actually, I’m here to see you.” 

 

“Me?” 

 

“Yep! I got a surprise shipment of mussels in, I thought you’d want first dibs.” 

 

“Of course!” 

 

Stiles smirked as he watched Marco excitedly drop his towel down on the counter, already making his way to the back door. He paused halfway there though, turning to Stiles. “Will you be alright for a few minutes on your own?” 

 

Stiles rolled his eyes. “Of course I will, Andy is right on the other side of this wall, anyway. I’ll be fine.” 

 

“Okay. I’ll be five minutes!” Marco was already making his way to the back door again, and Stiles shook his head fondly at his alpha. The dude was such a dork about his food. 

 

Stiles turned back to his laptop, and froze in shock. 

 

The laptop was gone. 

The table was gone. 

 

He was, he was in- Stiles spun around, but saw nothing but white. 

 

“What the - ” Stiles spun again, but it was still the same. He had been sitting! Had just been talking! “Did I fall asleep that fast?” 

 

Stiles tried to slap himself awake, but that did nothing but hurt his cheek.  

 

“Okay, calm down Stiles. Marco said he would be back in five minutes. He’ll see you lying there, and he’ll wake you up. It’ll be fine.” 

 

Stiles felt uneasy though. Twitchy in a way he didn’t usually feel, when he was here. He tried to sit down, but it was kind of weird to do that when you were floating… he kind of just, stopped using his legs. 

 

Not that he had even been using his legs? This was too weird. He needed to get out of here. 

 

“Marco, come on man! You said it would only be a few minutes!” Stiles had no idea how to tell time here, but surely it had been five minutes. Surely Marco would see him and wake him up any second now… 

 

Stiles wouldn’t be stuck here like this…alone. 

 

Stiles suddenly realized why he felt so uneasy. 

 

He glanced around, but only saw white. White on white on white on white. Not a person in sight. 

 

Had he ever been here alone before? 

 

This was different, he didn’t like it. He wondered if this is what Allison felt like, stuck in this nothingness all the time. She’d told him it was hard to tell how much time passed, but he hadn’t thought- he hadn’t known it would be like this. 

 

That it would feel this empty. This hollow. 

 

It reminded him of when he’d first left Beacon Hills, when he’d been alone, truly alone, for the first time in his life. When he’d wandered from city to city without anyone giving a shit about his well being. Not a single person asked if, hey, maybe this underage kid didn’t  _ want _ to be doing drugs on the street. Maybe he just needed someone to fucking  _ help _ him. 

 

Someone like Derek. 

 

But he wouldn’t fine Derek here. He would only find people like he’d found on the street. People who wanted to use him and then throw him aside. Like Kate. Like  _ Theo _ . 

 

Stiles curled into a ball, wishing he had never left the house, and had stayed with Derek and Cora to work on the barn. 

 

He grabbed onto his hair, held on tight, and waited for Marco to wake him up. 

 

\-- 

 

“-iles? Stiles, are you okay?” 

 

Stiles blinked his eyes open. His face was buried in a shoulder he would recognize anywhere. He clutched harder to the fabric of Derek’s shirt and breathed in the smell of his neck, the smell of his sweat after working on the barn all day. 

 

“Stiles, what’s going on?” 

 

Reluctantly, Stiles pulled away. He glanced around in surprise to find himself standing in their driveway, Marco walking up behind them with Charlie in his arms. 

 

“I don’t…” Stiles looked between the two men in confusion. “Did I zone out?” 

 

Marco sent Derek a look of alarm, “no.” He said, probably too calmly. “You were at the cafe with me and Andy, and then I drove us home, remember?” 

 

“No, I…” Stiles’ eyes widened as he remembered. “I fell asleep! Didn’t you see me sleeping at the table? You went out to check the mussels, and I fell… asleep…”  

 

Marco was looking at him with deep concern, so Stiles shut his mouth. Derek pulled Stiles against his side protectively. 

 

“Stiles… that was an hour ago that I went to check on the mussels.” Marco said, “and when I came back, you weren’t asleep. You were reading something on your laptop. Then we left, and you and I talked the whole way home. Don’t you remember?” 

 

Stiles didn’t reply. He clutched at Derek’s shirt and tried to remember what Lucinda taught him - panic would just open his mind further. And clearly his mind was wide open if someone  _ else _ had just been walking around, pretending to be him. 

 

“What did you talk about?” Derek asked. 

 

“Our land, the pack… how everyone was doing… I didn’t think until now that I was doing most of the talking, but you were asking a lot of questions about them.” 

 

Stiles felt his breath catch. “Questions like what?” Derek asked for him. 

Not again. Stiles was going to put them all in danger again, he was going to-

 

“Nothing bad. We talked about the baby coming, the renovations, Lisa and Isaac’s trip to Hawaii, our restaurant… you’d been so tired, recently, I didn’t think about it…I’m sorry. I should have realized it wasn’t you.” 

 

“It’s fine,” Stiles finally managed to speak through his dry mouth. “That’s what they do, when they get in your head. They trick everyone.” 

 

Derek made a noise at the back of his throat, and Marco flashed his eyes protectively at him. “No one is getting in your head. Derek, get him inside. I’ll go get Lucinda.” 

 

Stiles felt Derek nod against his neck, and then he was being guided towards the big house. Soon he felt himself being coaxed onto the couch. He didn’t dare rest against it - he didn’t want to fall asleep. 

 

“Can I have some water?” 

 

“Of course,” Derek said, pressing a kiss to Stiles hair before he made his way to the tap. 

 

The living room was attached to the kitchen. Derek could see him the whole time, Stiles wasn’t alone. He was  _ safe _ here. 

 

But it didn’t seem to make a difference, because Stiles was gone before Derek got back. 

 

\-- 

 

Derek kept his eyes on the back of Stiles head as he made his way into the kitchen. He paused part way there when Stiles head fell forward, but when Derek checked in, his heart rate stayed the same. His breathing stayed normal. Stiles appeared to be staring intently at his own hands, that he had clenched in his lap. Derek decided he was fine and kept going to retrieve Stiles water. 

 

As he was walking back, a cold glass in hand, Cora, Izzy and Andy walked in. They all took a moment to look over at Stiles, but turned to Derek when Stiles didn’t do anything but stare down at his hands. 

 

“Is he okay?” Cora asked. Izzy looked up at Derek with wide, worried, eyes. She held onto her mother’s hand with a tight grip. Derek wished he could reassure her that her Uncle Stiles would be fine. 

 

“I don’t know.” 

 

 “Marco texted everyone- I couldn’t believe,” Andy shook his head. “I should have noticed.” 

 

“It’s fine, Andy. I probably wouldn’t have noticed either, if Stiles hadn’t come back to himself as soon as he got here.” 

 

Cora and Andy looked doubtful, but they didn’t know. Thy hadn’t been there when the Nogitsune walked around with Stiles body - if his own father didn’t know for sure, how could Derek? 

 

Lucinda and Marco came running into the house, Charlie trotting at Marco’s heels. Lucinda held a bag that clattered with her every move. Derek could only assume it was full of jars and jars of herbs, sand, and mountain ash. Lucinda barely glanced at them before her gaze turned to Stiles. 

 

“How is he? Has he been sitting there this whole time?” 

 

“Yeah, he asked for water, but that’s all he’s said.” 

 

Lucinda grimaced. “We’ll have to check over everything, then maybe we could go back to my cottage. I have more supplies there.” 

 

“Do you think he’ll be okay?” Andy asked. 

 

“We’ll have to see. His mind must be more open than I thought it was.” 

 

“But you can fix it. You fixed it last time.” Derek insisted. Nana didn’t reply, but she did pat his shoulder as she walked past him. 

 

Derek sighed but he followed after her. Stiles lifted his head when he and Nana walked around the couch, and Derek dropped the glass of water. 

 

Because that wasn’t Stiles. 

 

Ignoring the glass on the ground, Derek stepped forward, throwing an arm in front of Lucinda and snarling at the  _ thing _ that was looking at Derek through Stiles’ eyes. The thing watched all of this with an amused curve to Stiles lips. It looked around, it’s eyes latching onto Cora, and then Izzy, before Derek’s low warning growl brought it’s attention back to him.

 

“What’s going on?” Marco asked, pushing Cora and Izzy behind him. Andy hurried to grab Charlie, who tried to jump up onto the couch to get to Stiles. 

 

“That’s not Stiles.” Derek growled. 

 

The thing raised Stiles eyebrows. It looked impressed - Derek snarled at it. “Get out of him!” 

 

Nana stepped to Derek’s side, throwing a handful of ash at Stiles body. It landed in a perfect circle around him, but the thing did not look bothered by it. It’s eyes stayed on Derek the whole time. 

 

“Whatever you are, get out of him! He’s not yours to take!” 

 

The thing curled Stiles mouth into a smile. Stiles body stood up, it raised his hands placatingly when all of the wolves growled at the motion. “I’m not here to harm you, or anyone, Derek. And Stiles is perfectly safe where he is right now. I won the battle before anyone more sinister could take over, but I doubt I will be able to do it again. I had to get through this time, though. I have to warn you.” 

 

“Who the hell are you? Why would we believe anything you warn us about?” Derek asked. 

 

The person in Stiles smiled, “who am I? Derek, can’t you recognize your own mother?” 

 

Derek’s eyebrows shot up, before coming down in a scowl. “You’re not my mom.” 

 

“I’m pretty sure I am, I was there when you were born, after all.” Then the thing at the audacity to  _ wink _ at him. “Cora too, hello dear.” It turned to smile at Cora, who growled back at it. 

 

“Prove it.” Derek said. 

 

The person in Stiles laughed, “oh my little darling pup, always so stubborn.” The thing stepped forward, right over the mountain ash line, like it didn’t affect it at all. It stopped in front of Derek, and brought a hand up to his face, caressing his cheek. Derek watched it suspiciously, but there was something there… something familiar. 

 

Something that was actually starting to convince him that this was his mother. 

 

“I bet those blue eyes of yours are just as beautiful now as they were the day you got them, under the nemeton with Paige.” Derek stiffened, but his mom made a shushing noise. “Oh, my darling. The world has always been too cruel to you.” 

 

She couldn’t know about that, only Derek’s family knew about that, and they were all gone…  but Stiles had been connecting to the dead, recently. So maybe… 

 

“Mom?” 

 

Talia nodded, and Derek launched himself into her arms. It was strange. He knew it was Stiles body, and it felt like Stiles body, but the way he moved, the way Stiles hands stroked through his hair, it felt just like his mother’s hugs. 

 

Derek closed his eyes and held her close. He only pulled back when Cora growled, “seriously, Derek, that’s all it takes?” 

 

“Ah, my little lion cub,” Talia said, smiling at Cora. “You always were the most ferocious little wolf pup I’d ever seen. I knew you would grow up to be strong. The Alpha of your own pack. And look at you, that’s exactly what you did.” 

 

Derek laughed, he’d forgotten, but his mother had used to talk about that. Even when Laura insisted that she was the next Alpha in line, their mom always said Cora had Alpha blood in her veins. 

 

“Derek-” 

 

“It’s her, Cora. I know it.” 

 

Cora stepped forward, still hesitant, but when she saw the look in Stiles’ eyes, when she felt their mother grab her hand, she melted into the touch. Soon, all three of them were huddled together, hugging each other in a way they hadn’t been able to do since Cora was eleven years old. 

 

“I am so proud of you both,” Talia said, pulling back to see both of their faces. “You’ve built such a wonderful pack, and you’re both so happy. That’s all I’ve ever wanted for you.” 

 

They both smiled at her, Cora dragged them both over to the couch, and the three of them talked, and touched, and cried, together. 

 

\-- 

It took ten minutes for Derek to calm down enough to think. Ten minutes before he pulled his head back from his mother's embrace and asked her what he should have asked _ ten minutes ago _ . 

 

“Where’s Stiles?” 

 

Cora pulled back too, but Talia didn’t seem to mind. She squeezed Derek’s shoulder, and ran a hand over Cora’s head, before turning back to him. 

 

“He’s safe, don’t worry.” 

 

“But where is he?” Nana asked. Derek looked over in surprise to find the rest of the pack standing in the middle of the living room, watching them. They didn’t look like they trusted Talia as much as Cora and Derek did. 

 

That was probably a good thing. 

 

“It doesn’t really have a name,” Talia said. “Stiles has somehow found a way into the in-between. Or limbo, if you will. It’s the place you go before you’re ready to move on. The place you stay if you don’t accept your own death.” 

 

“Is that where you are?” Cora asked. 

 

“No. But I can go to it. It’s where I found Laura, after she died.” 

 

Derek winced at the words, but his mother squeezed his wrist. “None of that, Derek. You have nothing to feel guilty for.” 

 

“But I-” 

 

“Did nothing wrong. Laura made her own choices. I made my own choices. I should have realized Kate had gotten to you. I should have made sure our home was safe. I’ve accepted that, you should too. You’ve been carrying this guilt for too long.” 

 

Derek’s mind whirled, but he didn’t know what to say. 

 

“You were the one who I spoke to in the car,” Marco said, drawing the attention away from Derek. Derek appreciated it. “You asked about the pack.” 

 

“Yes,” Talia smiled at him. “I am able to see some things, from my place beyond, but I can’t see everything. I wanted to make sure my children were safe here, happy. I believe they are.” 

 

The pack all shifted, processing everything they’d learned in the last few minutes. Talia turned to Izzy. 

 

“It’s nice to meet you, Izzy. I must say, you look just like your Mommy did when she was little.” 

 

Izzy peered at her from behind Marco’s legs. “You’re not Uncle Stiles.” 

 

“Smart girl. No, I’m not.” 

 

“I want Uncle Stiles back.” 

 

Talia pressed Stiles lips into a thin line, “yes, I hope to get him back as well. And to keep him here.” 

 

“Do you know what’s happening, then?” Nana asked, “how to stop it?” 

 

Talia shook her head. “All I know is that there something in Stiles mind. An opening that had closed, but then got pulled into limbo. I’m not sure how, or why, but my pack thinks it has something to do with the nature of Stiles magic mixed with lasting effects of the Nogitsune. But those are just theories.” 

 

“The pack?” Cora asked. 

 

“Yes, dear, we’re all there together, watching you. We can’t do anything, but we can make theories. Or, as your Aunt’s like to do, make bets.” 

 

Derek huffed out a laugh. He could picture Auntie Claire and Auntie Becki doing that… if Peter was there, he would no doubt be in on it too. 

 

Derek winced again at the thought. “We lost track of Peter.” 

 

Talia shrugged, “so did we. We don’t have time to talk about Peter anyway, I need to warn you about what’s happening with Stiles.” 

 

“It’s getting worse,” Nana said. It wasn’t a question. 

 

Talia nodded. “And the longer it goes on, the more people know about it. I don’t know them all, limbo is a strange place - it’s hard to decipher time, space, and even one's own identity, depending on how long you’ve been there. It does strange things to you. Even people who were once good can turn into monsters, after being stuck alone for so long in that place.”

 

Andy frowned, “so, Stiles is going to start going, like, crazy?” 

 

“No. Stiles is actually spending a relatively short amount of time there, when he goes.  I’m not saying it’s good for him, but I’m saying his connection to you, his ability to wake up with his pack, it helps. He’s not going to turn into something you don’t recognize.” Talia took a breath, “what I am worried about, however, are the people he is meeting. Someone figured out that this isn’t a one way street. There are ways to tape into Stiles mind - see his past, watch his present. There are people who want to go further, to take over entirely. I stopped them this time, but I can’t keep doing it. Stiles needs to learn how to keep them out. It’s the only way to stop them entirely.” 

 

“People like who?” Marco asked. 

 

“Like Kate.” Derek said. 

 

“Or Theo,” Lucinda added. 

 

“It could be anyone,” Talia said. “Like I said, that place changes you. Stiles can’t trust anyone he sees there. Not even me.” 

 

“But you aren’t stuck there,” Cora said. 

 

“Doesn’t matter. He can’t trust anyone.” 

 

Derek nodded, “I’ll tell him.” 

 

“Good.” Talia looked at all of them again, smiling fondly as she stroked her hand over Derek and Cora’s heads. “I have to go now. It’s best we don’t leave Stiles there for long.” 

 

Derek felt his heart tug. He wanted his mother to stay, this wasn’t nearly enough time with her, but on the other hand… Stiles was his everything. 

 

“I love you both so much. And I am so proud of you for building a new pack, and living your lives with love.” She squeezed both of their hands. “I’ll see you again. But not for a long time.” 

 

“We love you too, Mom,” Cora said, her voice full of tears. 

 

“Bye, Mom,” Derek said. 

 

Talia smiled at them one more time, before leaning her head back and closing her eyes. She was gone. 

 

\--

 

Derek watched Stiles body intently, waiting for Stiles to wake up. It had been a few minutes since Talia had left, and the pack was getting restless. 

 

“What if it’s not Stiles who wakes up?” Andy asked. 

 

“It will be.” Derek said. 

 

“Yeah, but what are we going to do if-” Nana shushed him before Andy finished his sentence. Derek felt his heart clench when Stiles still didn’t open his eyes. 

 

“Come on, Stiles,” Derek shook his shoulder gently. “Come back to me.” 

 

Stiles’ eyes snapped open. His face contorted into a mixture of confusion and fear. His scent was sharp, his heart beating rapidly. 

 

He looked at Derek like he had no idea who he was. 

 

“Stiles? It’s me, Derek,” Derek tried to reach for him, but Stiles jerked away. Cora stood up to give him space, allowing Stiles to huddle in the corner of the couch. “Stiles, it’s okay.” 

 

Stiles looked from Derek, to the rest of the room. “I- what, I-” Stiles shut his mouth, and Derek smelled blood. 

 

Charlie whined in Andy’s arms. 

 

“Don’t do that,” Derek pleaded. “ _ Stiles _ , you’re safe, it’s  _ me _ .” 

 

Stiles blinked, and then finally,  _ finally _ , Derek saw something flicker in his eyes. 

 

“Derek.” 

 

“Yes, it’s me. You’re safe, you’re at home with the pack. Everything's fine.” 

 

Stiles stared at him for a moment before he started to shake his head, his lips started to tremble. “No. It’s not.” 

 

This time when Derek moved towards him, Stiles moved with him. They met in the middle, clutching at each other. 

 

“I’m here,” Derek whispered in his ear. “I’m right here.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Stiles gets possessed in this chapter, it is not by anyone bad but it does take away Stiles autonomy and everyone is very upset by what it means for Stiles future.  
> Stiles also gets trapped in the 'white nothingness' while he is possessed. 
> 
> \-- 
> 
>  
> 
> Thanks for reading! Leave me a comment to let me know what you think :)
> 
> Or [come say hi on tumblr!](http://happyjuicyfruit.tumblr.com/)


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Therapy, coming to the rescue! 
> 
>  
> 
> Warnings: Stiles has a nightmare about his past issues with prostitution/drugs. Goes to therapy.

It took a long time for Stiles to calm down. Long enough for Lucinda to go make another potion, and for Andy to go make dinner. Cora took Izzy to her room, to try to explain what was happening to Uncle Stiles. Marco sat on the armchair beside the couch, watching over them. 

 

Charlie, as always, ended up in the cuddle pile with them. 

 

“It was horrible, Derek,” Stiles finally whispered against the skin of Derek’s neck. “It felt like I was stuck there, lost and alone, for…for days. Or hours. I don’t know. It was impossible to tell. ” 

 

Derek closed his eyes. “It was half an hour.” 

 

“Oh… so you - you noticed I was gone?” 

 

“Yes, as soon as I saw your face… I dropped your water.”

 

“That’s okay.” 

 

“Do you still want it?” 

 

 “I don’t want you to leave.” 

 

“I’ll go,” Marco said, standing up from his chair. Stiles and Derek relaxed into each other again. 

 

“Did you… do you know who it was?” Stiles asked. “Who was here?” 

 

“Yeah,” Derek fisted his hand into the back of Stiles’ shirt. “It was my mom.” 

 

“What?” Stiles tried to move back, but Derek held him in place. He didn’t want to look into Stiles eyes again, so soon after they had been his mothers. He needed to hold his body close, safe, when he talked about this. 

 

“She came here to warn us, to warn  _ you _ , about the place you’ve been going. It’s like limbo, the place between here and the afterlife. Apparently it changes people… you shouldn’t trust anyone you see there, Stiles. They might try to take advantage of you, try to get into your head.” 

 

Stiles snorted, “literally.” 

 

Derek smiled. He pressed his nose to Stiles hair, smelling his scent. It was lighter already. 

 

“So I should just ignore everyone I see?”

 

“Yeah. Nana’s trying to find a way to get it to stop, though. So you shouldn’t be seeing anyone.” 

 

They were quiet for a moment. The only sounds the sound of sizzling coming from the kitchen, Charlie’s soft snores coming from Stiles lap. 

 

“What if it’s my mom? Or Erica?” 

 

“Stiles…” 

 

“I can’t just ignore them.” 

 

Derek pulled away, enough to look at Stiles with furrowed brows. “This is serious, Stiles. You can’t give them anything they could use against you.” 

 

“I won’t.” Stiles face was set, his mouth in a grim line. 

 

Derek brushed the back of his fingers down Stiles cheek. “Okay.” 

 

\-- 

 

It isn’t until they are all sitting down at the dinner table that Lucinda came back, a handful of teabags in her hand. She held them out to Stiles wordlessly, and they all watch as Stiles looked at them, a pinched expression on his face. 

 

He took them a second later, shoving them into his pockets and ignoring their looks. 

He still doubted they were going to do anything, but his plan had obviously not worked. 

 

Time to try to sleep through the night again. 

 

\-- 

 

The next few days… sucked, to say the least. Stiles was exhausted. He was terrified to sleep, but now also terrified to stay up for too long. He and Nana talked about it, and agreed it was his lack of sleep that allowed Talia to slip in. He had let his guard down because he hadn’t had the energy to keep it up. Any slip up was dangerous right now. 

 

Which was why he was drinking her new potions. 

 

To his surprise, they actually worked -  at least half of the time. Isaac’s brother came to see him, as well as Laura, and Peter, on one very brief but memorable occasion. He had literally shown up, looked at Stiles, and then laughed for five minutes straight (as far as Stiles could tell in a place with no time) before disappearing again. 

 

And that was sadly not the strangest conversation Stiles had ever had with the man. 

 

Neither Derek nor Cora sounded that surprised to hear he was dead. They were both happy to hear from Laura though - so at least these weird ass dreams were good for something. 

 

On the other half of the nights, he dreamed. He dreamed of his nights on the streets of Las Vegas, New York, towns he didn’t even remember the name of. He dreamed of his first night with Theo. The first time he shot up heroin. The corner in New York he knew he would always catch a client. 

 

He dreamed, and he didn’t know which ones he hated more. His talks with the dead, or his own fucked up head. 

 

He did know one thing though. 

 

He couldn’t do this forever. 

 

\-- 

 

Derek woke up to the sound of screaming. He reached for Stiles before he fully opened his eyes. He rubbed Stiles back as his screams cut off into sobs. Pulled him in close when those faded into whimpers. 

 

Charlie licked the tears off of Stiles face as Derek brushed back his bangs. 

 

“You need a haircut.” Derek said, gently pulling on the strands. Stiles didn’t answer, he hadn’t really expected him to. “Want to talk about it?” Stiles took in a deep breath, still didn’t say anything. “Was it Theo?” 

 

Stiles shook his head and Derek felt himself calm down a little. Any reaction was good, at this point. 

 

“It was Fred.” 

 

“Oh.” That was new. Derek had almost forgotten about the man he had once worked with in New York. The same bastard who used to sell drugs to Stiles in exchange for sexual favours. If the man hadn’t been sent to prison, Derek would have killed him with his own bare hands. “Is he… did you see him in-” 

 

“No. It was just a normal nightmare,” Stiles broke out of the daze he was in and rubbed a hand down his face. He gave Charlie a faint smile when the dog started to lick his fingers after. The smile didn’t stay long. “It was one of the first times I met him… I told him I would let him do whatever he wanted, as long as he had the good stuff.” 

 

Derek moved his hand from Stiles back to his hand, intertwining their fingers together. He knew how much Stiles hated talking about this stuff.

 

“I was so fucking pathetic, Derek. I can’t believe I let him- I let  _ everyone- _ ” 

 

“Hey, baby, stop that,” Derek whisered, squeezing Stiles hand, “we’ve talked about this. You talked about this in therapy. You are not pathetic. You are not hopeless, or useless, or a mess either,” Derek added when he saw Stiles open his mouth. He clicked it shut, eyeing Derek doubtfully. “You are a strong, brilliant,  _ survivor _ , Stiles. And Fred is a piece of shit rotting away in prison. You were alone, and grieving, and people took advantage of that while you were trying to make your way across the country to save yourself. But you still managed it. You saved yourself, and you made it. You made your way to me.” 

 

Stiles sighed, “it’s not like I was trying to find you.” 

 

Derek smirked, “that’s not what you told me.” 

 

Stiles stilled, “what?” 

 

“In my apartment in New York, when you were in withdrawal, you told me you came to New York because you knew that’s where I went with Laura.” 

 

Even through the dark, Derek could see Stiles face darken in a blush. “I don’t remember that.” 

 

“You were pretty out of it,” Derek whispered, running his thumb over Stiles knuckles. 

 

“I still wasn’t trying to find you. I just… thought if I did happen to run into you, it wouldn’t be the worst thing.” 

 

Derek smiled, “I’m glad I ran into you.” 

 

“You weren’t at the time.” 

 

“I was.” 

 

“You were pissed.” 

 

“I was  _ worried _ .” 

 

“Oh.” Stiles bit his lip. Derek knocked their foreheads together. 

 

“Can I make an appointment with Dr. Patel tomorrow? So you can talk about these nightmares you keep having?” 

 

“Priya isn’t a miracle worker, you know. She’s not going to be able to fix all my broken pieces.” 

 

“She helped you last time.” Derek said. “You can talked to her about stuff you don’t like talking to me about. Can you try?” 

 

Stiles was silent for a moment, absently stroking Charlie’s head as he thought about it. “Yeah… yeah, okay. I’ll go.” 

 

“Thank you,” Derek whispered. He buried his nose in Stiles hair and held him close. 

 

He wished there was more he could do. 

 

\-- 

 

Derek sat in the waiting room of Dr. Patel’s office, watching the giant fish tank across the room. There were eight fish in it, all of them swimming lazily around. A few stayed near the top, while others dipped into the fake sunken ship someone had put in the bottom. 

 

Derek had been here so many times in the past year, he had named every single one of these dumb little fish. And although he had kind of grown attached to them, he had been hoping he wouldn’t have to see them anytime soon. 

But here he was again - waiting for Stiles to come out of his hour-long therapy appointment. 

 

Derek let his head fall back against the wall, his eyes tracing Steve, a pale blue, chase after Laputa, a dull orange. Steve eventually got bored and swam back to the sunken ship… or maybe he forgot what he was doing. All this time, he still didn’t know much about fish. 

 

Last year, this had made sense. Stiles had finally started to face what had happened to him on the streets, and at the hands of that sociopath, Theo. He had been processing shit Derek couldn’t even imagine, and reliving the hell he had lived for over a year. Derek had taken Stiles into therapy sessions twice a week for three months straight, when Stiles had first started. He always left the sessions shaky, sometimes with red rimmed eyes, but Derek never pushed. He let Stiles talk if he wanted to, and he let Stiles sit in silence if he didn’t. 

 

Sometimes they would stop for ice cream on the way home - and Stiles would be smiling by the time they got to their cottage. 

 

Other times, Stiles had just wanted to drive. To stare mindlessly out of the window as the trees blurred together, and neither of them said a word. On more than one occasion, they had ended up on the coast, where they had sat together to stare blankly at wide expanse of blue. 

 

That’s what life had been like, nine months ago. And Derek had never once complained. Had never once asked someone else to take Stiles, or expected Stiles to go by himself, because he knew this was what Stiles needed. And he had known he had needed it too. Watching Stiles face his past had been healing for Derek, too. It had calmed the part of his mind that was always worried about Stiles, just a bit. It had allowed his world to relax, knowing that he was doing right by his mate. 

 

Then six months ago, Stiles switched from two sessions a week to one. Then from once a week to once every other week. Stiles had finally gotten to the place, now, where he only went in once every month - partially for a mental check in, and partially to appease the pack’s worry over him. 

 

And now Stiles was dreaming of dead people, and having nightmares every other night, and Derek was back to watching the eight colourful fish swimming in circles across from him. 

 

He did not think this was fair. 

 

\-- 

 

Stiles looked tired when he walked out of the office, though, Stiles always looked tired nowadays. 

 

At least he wasn’t crying. 

 

“How’d it go?” Derek asked, standing up as Stiles walked up to him. He threw an arm over Stiles shoulders and pulled him in for a hug. One that Stiles returned immediately. 

 

“Fine. She said something that I need to talk to you about but...” Stiles mumbled into Derek’s chest. “Let’s get out of here first.” 

 

Derek hummed into Stiles hair, “okay, let me grab our jackets.” 

 

Stiles groaned, pushing his head back and flailing his arms out. “Hurry up, I hate this place!”

 

Derek rolled his eyes, moving to the coat rack to grab their stuff. “Okay, come on drama queen, let’s get you home.” He stepped forward, placing his hand on Stiles back, leading him out of the building. He was actually glad Stiles was whining - that meant he wasn’t feeling that bad. “Ice cream?” 

 

“Yes, please,” Stiles said, pulling himself into Derek’s truck. Charlie jumped around happily as Stiles squeezed himself into the seat beside the dog. “Hey puppy, did you have a nice nap while we were in there?” 

 

Derek kept half an eye on Stiles as he drove them to the drive through Dairy Queen. He felt himself relax the more Stiles laughed at Charlie’s squirming. 

 

He was fine. He was going to be okay. 

 

Dr. Patel was a miracle worker. 

 

Derek ordered plain vanilla, and Stiles got his covered in chocolate. Charlie whined when he didn't get a treat. 

 

“I’ll give you a treat at home, little Chuck,” a new addition to the many nicknames Stiles had for the dog, “you know I can’t slip you something with Derek sitting right here.” 

 

Derek huffed, “don’t blame me. Chocolate is bad for dogs.” 

 

“See? Daddy Derek does not approve.” 

 

Derek glared at him. He was ignored. 

 

Derek drove for a while, absently licking his ice cream so it wouldn’t melt, before pulling off into the trees. He parked the truck in a gravel parking lot, beside a nature trail they sometimes took Charlie for a walk on. 

 

He shut the truck off, and turned to Stiles expectantly. This is what they always did, when Stiles wanted ice cream after a session. The two of them stopped to eat their ice cream and talked. It also gave Stiles another moment before he was surrounded by a concerned pack. 

 

“So, what do you want to talk about?” Derek started, exactly how he always started. 

 

Stiles shrugged, licking his ice cream for another second before he turned to Derek. “She thinks the dreams I have of talking to the dead are bringing up memories I was trying to forget. Like, I’ve seen Theo three times now, so now I’m dreaming of what life was like when he was alive. Processing, or whatever. That’s not the big news, though… she’s heard of this happening before.” 

 

Derek froze. “She’s heard of something like your dreams before? The talking to the dead ones?” Derek asked. 

 

Stiles didn’t look at him, his eyes on his ice cream. “She said last time I came in, the way I explained it really stuck with her. She realized what it was when I told her about it this time… She used to know someone who could do something similar. He purposefully had dreams where he talked to the dead. But he was a  _ necromancer _ .  He did it by choice, he wasn’t, like, thrown into it.” 

 

Derek cocked his head, “but he did something similar? He went to the white room, and talked to people in limbo?” 

 

If this was true, if Priya really did know a necromancer who had been through the same thing… then shit, they had an explanation. And once they knew what this was, they would be able to stop it. 

 

Stiles wouldn’t have to live the rest of his life in fear of the dead. 

 

“Well, he described it as black, so either it was a bit different or it looks different to everyone,” Stiles shrugged. “She hasn’t seen him in a long time, but she thinks he would be willing to help me if she can find him. She said she’ll start looking into it immediately.” 

 

“This is great, Stiles,” Derek beamed, “this is an actual lead! What’s his name? We could get your dad-“ 

 

“She didn’t have a name, she didn’t have anything but a contact that might be able to help. We have no way of finding him. It could be another dead end.” Stiles tried to shrug it off, but Derek refused to let him. 

 

“ _ Or _ , you could end up learning necromancy magic and gain the ability to control this thing. To stop it.” 

 

“Yeah, maybe…” Stiles turned back to his ice cream, so Derek didn’t push it. Stiles was obviously trying not to get his hopes up - and Derek understood that. He was feeling hopeful though, for the first time since this whole thing started. 

 

Dr. Patel: miracle worker. 

 

They finished their treats in silence. When Derek finished his first, he moved to start the car, but Stiles shot his hand out to stop him. He turned to the boy with a raised brow. 

 

“I just wanted to-” Stiles cheeks suddenly flushed pink as he pulled his hand away. “Thanks.” 

 

“For what?” 

 

“You know, always coming with me. I know it’s not easy for you either.” 

 

Derek turned to him, “I’ll always be there for you when you need me, Stiles. Always.” 

 

Stiles smiled, “I know. I’m wanted to say I appreciated it. And… I’m there, too. Whenever you need me.” 

 

Derek smiled, “I know.” 

 

They leaned forward at the same time, meeting in the middle for a sweet, chaste, kiss. Derek knocked his nose against Stiles before pulling back. 

 

“I love you, you giant marshmallow,” Stiles said. 

 

Derek smirked. “I know.” 

 

Stiles snorted, “shut up and drive the car.” 

 

\-- 

 

The first stop they made when they got home was Nana’s cabin. The three of them sat around her table, drinking tea. She stared at them for a long time after Stiles finished explaining Priya’s theory. 

 

“That’s impossible,” she said, eyes moving up and down Stiles body. “Isn’t it?” 

 

Stiles shrugged. 

 

“Some people say witches are impossible,” Derek said. 

 

“But, necromancy is… I’ve never seen it before,” Nana put her mug down, standing up and walking over to Stiles. She grabbed his face in her hands and twisted him left and right, before pulling him forward and staring into his eyes. They stared at each other for two full minutes before she dropped her hands and started to laugh. 

 

“Is Priya right?” Derek asked, having no idea what just happened, “is he a necromancer?” 

 

“I have no idea, but the magic inside of Stiles is not like anything I’ve ever seen before. It’s changed, even from the last time I checked a few weeks ago.” 

 

“What does that mean?” Stiles asked, crossing his arms and looking small in his chair. Derek reached a hand out and cupped his neck. 

 

“It means I can’t be your teacher anymore.” Nana said, though she didn’t sound that sad about it. “Our magics aren’t the same. Hopefully Priya can find this necromancer friend of hers, so he can teach you how to handle this.” 

 

“But your potion is working!” Stiles protested, “I’m getting better!” 

 

“For now,” Nana said. “And only half the time. It’s alright, Stiles, I won’t leave you in his hands alone. I’ll still be here to guide you. We have to stop doing all of our training sessions though, we don’t know what they’re doing to your magic.” 

 

Stiles slumped down his chair, looking dejected. “Okay.” 

 

Nana reached out to ruffle his hair. “I’m excited to meet this mysterious necromancer. Who knows what you will be able to accomplish, Stiles? This is exciting!” 

 

“Yeah,” Stiles said, putting on a smile that Derek could tell wasn’t real. 

 

\-- 

 

The pack were all home and finishing the dinner dishes when they heard the familiar sound of tires on gravel coming down their driveway. 

 

“Auntie Lisa and Uncle Isaac!” Izzy yelled, taking off for the front door. 

 

Cora immediately lumbered after her, and Marco trailed behind the two. Stiles, Derek, Andy and Lucinda finished putting everything away before following after them. Lisa and Isaac were just climbing out of the car when they all made their way outside. 

 

To absolutely no one's surprise, Lisa held up her hand as soon as she stepped towards them. Her finger shone with a brand new engagement ring. 

 

Cora screamed. Stiles was not too proud to join in. The three of them jumped up in down in the middle of the driveway as Derek and Marco pulled Isaac into hugs, manly patting each other on the back. 

 

Whatever, girls had more fun anyway. 

 

“Okay, okay, let us see it,” Stiles grabbed Lisa’s hand, forcing her to stop jumping around. Cora leaned over to peer down at it too. “Damn girl, that’s a big ass rock.” 

 

“Big ass rock!” Izzy shouted pushing herself into the middle of their circle. Stiles winced, whoops. 

 

“Let me see my baby girls big ass rock,” Lucinda said, pushing her way in too. She whistled when she saw the ring. “It’s beautiful, Lisa.” 

 

“Thanks, Nana,” Lisa smiled, pulling her grandmother in for a hug that the rest of the pack was quick to join. The wolves all not so subtly ran their hands all over their two pack members who had been away, making sure they smelled right again. 

 

“Congratulations you guys!” Stiles shouted from the middle, “this is so exciting! We should have a party! An engagement party!” 

 

“Is that a thing?” Lisa asked. 

 

“Everything’s a thing.” Andy said, “it’s getting warmer out, we could make it a barbeque.” 

 

“We could have it this weekend,” Marco said, turning to lead them back into the house. 

 

“That’s fast,” Isaac said. “We could wait until after the baby, I mean… is everything okay here,” his eyes shifted to Stiles. “Should we be having a party?” 

 

“Don’t worry about me, I’m fine.” Stiles said. “Lucinda and I are working out a few kinks to a potion that’s actually working.” 

 

“And,” Derek cut in, “Dr. Patel gave us a lead.  A necromancer who might know how to stop all this entirely.” 

 

Derek looked so happy, his smile on full force when he told Lisa and Isaac the news. Stiles just nodded along with him. There was no point telling them this wasn't a guarantee. The pack deserved some hope that Stiles wasn’t going to be insane forever. 

 

Even if Stiles had already accepted that he would be himself. 

 

“Oh, Stiles, I’m so glad,” Lisa said, throwing her arm over his shoulders as they finally all settled into the living room. “I was worried about you all week.” 

 

“We told you we would let you know if anything happened.” Derek said. 

 

“And we didn’t believe you,” Isaac said. 

 

Derek rolled his eyes. 

 

“Nothing happened. It’s all working out… I mean, as long as we can find this guy. I’m trying not to put all my hopes on this necromancer, but... ” 

 

“But it would make sense,” Lucinda said. “Stiles started having these dreams within the first year that I started practicing magic with him. He hadn’t been doing any magic before that, not on purpose. If we tapped into his potential magic, then perhaps this is what his natural abilities are meant to be. Necromancy is dark, yes, but it isn’t necessarily evil. It would make sense that it would be a type of magic that Stiles would connect with, given what he’s been through with the Nogitsune. This could be his own magic causing all of this, and we simply don’t know how to control it.” 

 

Stiles crossed his arms and curled into himself at her words. Everyone was too focused on Nana to notice. 

 

Of course the darkness in Stiles would come back. He was going to have it forever… he should have known that, by now. There was no escaping your past. 

 

“Can’t you teach him?” Lisa asked. 

 

Lucinda shook her head, “I’m a witch, not a necromancer. Those are rare. I’ve never actually met one, before. For all I know, I could be making it worse. The forms of meditation I use to clear my mind could be opening Stiles mind further.” 

 

“But… wasn’t it working?” Isaac asked. “He stopped zoning out as much.” 

 

“True, but that was when his powers were still new. Still a spark, more than anything else. Now they’re maturing, and they’re leaning towards necromancy more than witchcraft, if the dreams are what we think they are.” Lucinda raised a hand to rub her forehead, “I still can’t believe I didn’t think of this myself. It’s obvious, now that the idea is out there. Communicating with the dead, having the dead speak through you - both giant signs. Stiles just isn’t able to control the powers yet.” 

 

“We don’t know if this is what it is,” Stiles grumbled from the couch beside Derek. “We haven’t actually found the guy to confirm it, or anything, Dr. Patel just told me it sounded familiar.” 

 

“But still,” Lisa said. “It’s a good lead.” 

 

“Yeah, I guess.” Stiles felt uncomfortable, having everyone talk about his potential dark powers like they were no big deal. Like necromancy wasn’t a creepy as shit, dark magic, that only a few people on earth practiced. 

 

Like Stiles wasn’t a tainted soul, sitting among them like it was normal. 

 

So he did what he did best, and he changed the subject. “Enough about that. Isaac, tell us what happened in Hawaii!” 

 

Isaac shifted awkwardly, “uh we had a great time? We went snorkeling, and we hiked up-” 

 

“No, idiot, he was asking about the proposal!” Cora said. “How did you propose?” 

 

“Oh well, I took Lisa out to dinner to this fancy place that was down the street from out hotel. Then we walked back along the beach, and halfway back, I stopped and uh-” 

 

“Did you get down on one knee?” Andy asked. 

 

“Uh, no.” 

 

“What did you say?” Marco asked.

 

“Um-” 

 

“I asked him,” Lisa said, and they all turned to her in surprise. “The poor man stopped walking and stared blankly at me for so long, I knew he wasn’t going to be able to do it. I knew what he was wanting to do, so I asked him to marry me first.” 

 

“That’s actually adorable,” Stiles said. 

 

“I said yes,” Isaac said, smiling now, “and then I pulled out the box and gave her the ring.” 

 

Derek snorted, shaking his head at the couple. Stiles smacked him. “It’s cute!” 

 

“Yes, it is.” 

 

Stiles smiled down at him, knowing full well he looked like a goofy idiot, but not caring. Not when Derek was smiling at him exactly the same. 

 

Stiles wondered if Derek was also thinking about their own future together. Would they ever want to get married? Stiles would say yes, in a heartbeat, if Derek asked him, but they had never actually talked about it before. 

 

Thinking about it now, though, he didn’t know if Derek wanted a committed future with him, now that Stiles was like this… 

 

“We should start planning the party,” Andy said, “we need to start inviting people if we’re having it so soon.” 

 

“You just want to make sure Jenny can come,” Marco said, grinning at Andy when he went beet red. 

 

“We also need to sort out food, Marco. We have very little time to plan this thing, it has nothing to do with Jenny!” 

 

“Sure it doesn’t,” Isaac said. 

 

It went downhill from there, and Stiles was pretty sure they weren’t going to get any planning done tonight, but he didn’t care. 

 

He was content, snuggled up beside his boyfriend with his pack. 

 

It was nice to feel normal for once. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you're all enjoying it so far! See you in a few days :)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The drama is back gang, sorry. 
> 
> Warnings in the end notes.

As expected, they didn’t get anything planned that night. The next day, Andy and Cora made the guest list, and started calling the few people outside of pack they were inviting. It was only the day before the actual party, however, that they actually started to get ready.  Between all of their jobs, none of them had had time before then to work on it.  

 

Andy and Cora were already prepping the desserts for tomorrow. Cora was working on cupcakes, while Andy made pudding. 

 

Marco and Lisa were making a menu and writing out a list of food they would need to buy for dinner. Isaac had been put on chair duty, meaning, he had to find wherever the hell he had shoved their extra outdoor table and chair furniture from last years barbeques. 

 

Isaac looked a bit panicked when he realized they weren’t in the shed, like he thought they were. Stiles knew for a fact that they were actually in the basement, next to the Christmas decorations. Isaac had said they didn’t need to clutter up the shed when they weren’t going to be using them most of the time, like the Christmas decorations. Isaac didn’t remember this. Stiles wasn’t about to tell him. 

 

Because Stiles was stuck doing the balloons, and it was bullshit. 

 

“I can do more than blow air into plastic, you know,” Stiles grumbled to Derek, who was sitting beside him on the living room couch, stringing pieces of triangle paper together. 

 

“Everyone knows that, Stiles, but we’re on decorations.” 

 

“ _ You _ are on decorations, I am just blowing up balloons!” Stiles waved a hand at the pile behind him. Izzy and Charlie could be seen under the pile, rolling around under the balloons with glee. 

 

Stiles refused to find them adorable. He was mad, damnit. 

 

“Balloons are part of decorations,” Derek rolled his eyes. 

 

Stiles jabbed a finger at him, “balloons are a lazy excuse of a decoration.  We could have signs! We could have banners! We could have those swirly things that blow in the wind and hang them off of every tree branch! We could have an ice-” 

 

“We are not getting an ice sculpture.” Derek said, his eyebrows going all judgemental. “I’m making these paper banner things, and we’re going to have a congratulations sign. Isaac and Lisa aren’t the type of people who would want more than that, we’ve been over this.” 

 

Stiles pouted, “maybe they need to see it first. It would be adorable! The two of them, kissing! Arms around each other! We could put it by the wine table.” 

 

“You mean the drinks table. We don’t have enough wine for it to take up a whole table.” 

 

“Nobody ever does, but it’s fancier to call it a wine table.” 

 

Derek sighed, pausing what he was doing so he could pinch the bridge of his nose in exasperation. “Even if I agreed to this, it would be too late. We couldn’t be able to find anywhere to make it that fast. The party’s tomorrow.” 

 

“I could make it!” 

 

“Stiles.” 

 

“No, seriously, I was working on ice with Lucinda a few weeks ago, before all this crap happened and she insisted that all we do is meditate, which I’m not even supposed to do anymore. I could totally do it.” 

 

Derek levelled him with a look, “you’re not doing magic.” 

 

“I could totally do magic.” 

 

“No.” 

 

“Derek, I could totally do it. I haven’t had any of those dreams for like, five days! I haven’t spaced out, or been possessed. The tea is working, I could totally do magic.” 

 

Derek raised a brow, “did Nana say you could do magic?” 

 

Stiles hesitated, he looked down at the balloon he’d been stretching between his hands. “Well, she  _ didn’t _ say I-”

 

“You’re not doing magic.” 

 

Stiles whined, crossing his arms and flopping against the pillows. Derek didn’t even look at him.  

 

“When you’re done sulking, finish blowing up your balloons. I’ll be outside taping up the banner.” 

 

Stiles stayed still as Derek gathered up all his paper bits and made his way outside. 

 

He blew up the stupid balloons. 

 

\-- 

 

Despite the lack of an ice sculpture, the party was a hit. The pack was all there, of course, along with Jenny, Sandy, Melissa and Stiles dad. Lisa and Marco’s old pack Skyped in to say hello, and the pack bordering theirs sent a gift basket. 

 

All in all, it was a success. 

 

Stiles smiled to himself as he ate his fourth kabob of the evening. Marco has gone a bit crazy with the barbecue, so Stiles assumed the ‘three each’ rule was out the window. Dude was obsessed with barbecuing. 

 

Lucinda, Sandy, and Derek were all talking around the fire pit they had set up. Marco and Cora sat with them too, huddled together on the other side of the fire with Izzy squished between them. 

 

Derek’s feet splayed out in front of him invitingly. Stiles was definitely going to go curl up between those legs soon. After he grabbed another plate of Cora’s potato salad. 

 

As he filled up his plate, Stiles turned to look at the middle of the clearing. A wireless speaker had been set up, linked to Isaacs iPhone. Stiles had convinced Derek to hang lights across the tree branches over the spot - the effect causing a soft glow to fall over exactly the right spot to dance. 

 

And dance they did. 

 

His dad and Melissa were the cutest, mostly because they were holding each other and swaying more than dancing. His dads cane was propped up against the nearest table, just in case, but he didn’t seem concerned. They stood solidly, holding onto each other.

 

Beside them, Andy twirled Jenny in the grass. Her skirt flew high, and Andy’s smiled wide as he dipped her, nosing her cheek before pulling her upright again. They were by far the best dancers, but they clearly didn’t care. They were out here to have fun.

 

And in the middle, were Isaac and Lisa. They gently moved back and forth, Lisa's head in Isaacs shoulder. After the dinner, the dessert, the Skype call, and all the chit chat had started to die out, the two of them had met on the dance floor and haven’t moved since. 

 

Stiles grinned happily at them. 

 

He carried his loot over to the fire, making himself comfortable between Derek’s legs as he listened to their conversation.

 

Something about cats. 

 

Stiles shrugged, caring more about his food and watching the flames then joining in on the talk. He hummed happily and tilted his head back when he felt Derek’s fingers stroke through his hair. 

 

He rested his head on Derek’s knee, feeding the last of his potato salad to Charlie, who ate it all up with great excitement.

 

Stiles sighed in content, the night was perfect. He hadn’t had a dream about limbo in an entire week. His therapist had called this morning and told him she had finally tracked down the country the necromancer was in, she was following the trail now.  

 

Things were looking up. Stiles was finally starting to feel like things weren’t so bad after all. 

 

Then he frowned down at Charlie when the little dog let out a whine. 

 

When he looked up - all he saw was white. 

 

“God damn it.”

 

—

 

“Okay- okay, this isn’t so bad. I’ve only been here for what,” Stiles glanced at his watch. It stayed exactly where it was the last time he checked, at 9:04PM. “A few minutes, that’s not so bad. Derek will notice soon and… and he’ll get me out of here. Yep. Just a few more minutes.” 

 

Stiles floated around, counting down the minutes in his head. When he got to five minutes he let out a groan and flayed out backwards. It kind of felt like he was floating in water now. 

 

“Wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, come  _ on _ !” 

 

“Isn’t this interesting,” a voice said behind him. Stiles twisted around, and found himself face to face with Peter Hale. 

 

Great. 

 

“What are you doing here? I thought I was being, you know, possessed right now. Or was it you who did this? Did you just take over my body? What did you do, Peter?” 

 

Peter raised his hands, waving away Stiles accusations like they were an annoying fly, “now, now, calm down Stiles. You need to keep a sane head if you’re going to get through this intact.” 

 

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” 

 

Peter smiled at him, “exactly what it sounds like. Haven't you noticed your mental well being is connected to this? How else do you think people keep slipping in?” 

 

“Of course I’ve noticed that,” Stiles snapped, “but I’ve been good recently! I was happy and healthy beside Derek like five minutes ago!” 

 

“More like twenty.” Stiles felt himself go still. He had been here a lot longer than he thought he had. “And if you’re doing so well, as  you seem to think, then why can anyone who has any interest in doing so peer right into your memories at the drop of a hat? I only watched a few myself, you’ve been through some tough times, Stiles, living on the streets? Drugs? You always were an interesting one, I can’t say I saw any of that coming.” 

 

Stiles gaped at him, “you can- you can see into my memories?” 

 

“Yes, and someone in particular has taken quite an interest in them. They’ve watched almost all of them, by now.” 

 

Stiles felt sick. “Who?” 

 

“No idea, it’s hard to identify people in here, you know? No legal system to hack into.” 

 

Fucking Peter, he was such a dick. “Why should I believe you?” 

 

“Been having strange dreams recently, Stiles? Dreams that are more like memories? The only time we can really access them is when you’re unconscious, after all. Barriers down, memories up.” 

 

Fuck. “ _ Fuck _ .” 

 

“Fuck, indeed. I recommend trying to shut that down. Probably dangerous for so many dead people to have access to that.” Peter said, “as a necromancer, you’re supposed to be the one getting information from us. It’s kind of funny that magic is turning on you before you even know how to use it.” 

 

“Fuck off, Peter, you’re not helping,” Stiles grumbled running his hands through his hair. 

 

“I’m giving you information, aren’t I? The Stiles I knew would gather up any information he could, and use it to his advantage.” 

 

“The Stiles you knew disappeared when he left Beacon Hills.” 

 

“Maybe you're right,” Peter said, his eyes sharp. “The Stiles I knew would never have put Derek and Cora through all of this. And he wouldn’t even  _ think _ about putting them through more.” 

 

Stiles frowned, “what the fuck is that supposed to mean? They’re my pack, they want to be here.” 

 

But Peter was already gone. 

 

And a second later, so was Stiles. 

 

The world came rushing back, the white swiftly turning into black. Stiles stumbled as gravity kicked in, and he fell hard against the ground. His fingers curled into grass and dirt. He turned his head to see a tree trunk, surrounded by liquor bottles. Three of them, propped up against the rough bark of the tree. 

 

It took him another second to realize the reason his head was spinning was not because he was just transported back into his body. 

 

His head was spinning because he was drunk. 

 

\-- 

 

Derek sat in the plastic lawn chair, sipping a beer and feeling content. He had a full belly, he was surrounded by happy pack members, and his mate was curled up between his legs. 

 

It didn’t get better than this. 

 

Stiles stirred from the ground, standing up and stepping away from him. Derek frowned, “where are you going?” 

 

“Just getting a drink,” Stiles said, point towards the tables. “I’ll be right back.” 

 

Derek grabbed Stiles hand before he could move too far away, pulling him back to kiss his wrist. Stiles gave a little laugh when Derek released him, “come right back.” 

 

“Yeah,” Stiles said, but he was looking at Derek like he was seeing him for the first time. “I’ll be right back.” 

 

Stiles headed towards the drinks table, and Derek watched him go with concern. That wasn’t a normal look, maybe he should go check in on him, away from the rest of the pack. 

 

Izzy plopped down onto his lap before Derek could move. 

 

“Uncle Derek, are you going to marry Uncle Stiles now that Auntie Lisa is marrying Uncle Isaac?” 

 

Derek stared at the girl, “um, maybe.” 

 

Izzy frowned, “it’s a yes or no question.” 

 

Derek laughed, “I don’t know, baby girl, we haven’t talked about it yet.” 

 

“Why not? Mommy and Daddy are married, and Auntie Lisa and Uncle Isaac are going to be married, you should be married too!” 

 

Derek blinked at her, “Uncle Andy isn’t married yet.” 

 

Across from him, Cora snorted, “way to throw Andy under the bus.” 

 

“Uncle Andy can’t get married yet, he doesn’t have anyone to marry!” 

 

“You’re on a roll tonight, kiddo,” Cora laughed. “Now come help Mommy up, I need to pee.” 

 

Izzy scrambled over to Cora, pulling on her hand and helping her to her feet. Cora was so round now, Derek was impressed she could get up with only the help of a toddler. 

 

“Thanks sugar pie, now go back to bugging Uncle Derek.” 

 

She flicked his ear as she walked by, and Derek sent her a glare. Izzy climbed back into his lap to tell him all about her upcoming duties of being a flowergirl. Derek nodded along with her, very impressed that she was already practicing. 

 

It wasn’t until Cora came waddling back over that Derek realized something was wrong. 

 

“You’re back already?” 

 

Cora glared at him, “ha ha, very funny. You try getting off the toilet with three bowling balls strapped to your stomach.” 

 

Derek looked towards the drink table, and only saw Andy and Jenny digging through the cooler. He looked to the dance floor and saw the sheriff, Melissa, Isaac and Lisa. He glanced around the fire and everyone was still talking, but Stiles wasn’t sitting between his legs. Charlie was hiding under one of the chairs, his tail tucked between his legs and his ears pinned back. 

 

Something was wrong. 

 

He gently pushed Izzy off his lap and stood up. 

 

“What’s wrong?” Cora asked.  Marco, Sandy, and Lucinda looked over as well, all of them tensing when they saw Derek frantically scanning the clearing. 

 

“I don’t… Stiles went to get a drink, he never came back.” 

 

“Maybe he’s inside?” Lucinda said. 

 

“I was just inside, he’s not there,” Cora said, grabbing onto Izzy’s hand. “Do you think he… do you think it’s-” 

 

“I don’t know, Cora,” Derek growled, stalking towards the drinks table. “We need to find him.” 

 

They all followed him to the table, where Derek was scenting the air. Stiles had been here, but it was old. Not for the last ten minutes at least. 

 

“What’s going on?” Andy asked. 

 

“Have you seen Stiles, recently?” Marco asked back. Andy and Jenny both shook their heads, and Derek felt his heart clench. 

 

Stiles was missing. 

 

“Lisa!” Nana called to the dancers, “have you seen Stiles?” 

 

All of the dancers stopped their movements. 

 

“No,” Lisa said, moving to turn off the music. “Is he missing?” 

 

“When was the last anyone saw him?” John asked, walking towards them. Melissa moved to grab John’s cane, handing it to him as they stopped beside Derek. 

 

“I saw him,” Derek rubbed a hand through his hair, “ten minutes ago? Fifteen? He said he was going to get a drink, I didn’t notice he didn’t come back.” 

 

“Okay, Derek, that’s fine,” John said, even as his own forehead wrinkled with concern. “Fifteen minutes isn’t long. Isaac and Lisa, you two go check if any of the cars are missing. The rest of you fan out and start searching the woods. Lucinda, do you mind staying with Melissa?”

 

Nana nodded, already raising a glowing hand that lit up a ten meter radius around them. The two of them hooked their arms together.  

 

“Okay, I’ll stay here with Cora and Izzy, in case he comes back. I’m not really up to trekking through the woods, unfortunately.” John glared down at his cane. “If that’s alright with you, of course.” 

 

“Fine by me,” Cora said. “But keep us updated, the trail leads out of the woods, let us know.” 

They all agreed, and Derek barely waited for their assent before he took off, following the scent trail. It didn’t last long. 

 

“Someone’s cloaked it purposefully,” Marco said. “Can Stiles do that?” 

 

“Yes, but he wouldn’t,” Derek growled. 

 

“Andy and Jenny, go east. Nana, Melissa, and Sandy, go west. Derek and I will head north. Shout if you find anything.” 

 

Derek didn’t wait to see if they agreed. He ran in his beta shift, his scanning the ground and the trees around him for any sign of Stiles. The deeper into the woods they got, the more his chest ached. 

 

He stopped when he got to a ravine. 

 

“I don’t hear anything down there,” Marco said beside him. “If he came this way, he must have gone around.” 

 

“Corpses don’t make any sound.” 

 

“Derek,” Marco grabbed his shoulder. “He’s not dead, we’ll find him.” 

 

“You don’t know that.” 

 

“I do, I can feel him,” Marco tapped his chest. “His bond is still here, he’s alive.” 

 

Derek felt his chest loosen a bit, but only slightly. He felt so numb right now from fear, he could barely feel his own pack bonds.“But we don’t know if it’s him we’re going to find. We don’t know what this- this  _ thing _ is planning.” He covered his mouth with his hand, he needed to get a grip. He would never find Stiles like this. 

 

“We’ll figure it out, we just have to find him first.” Derek nodded. Marco looked between the two sides of the ravine. “Which way should we go?” 

 

A flare went up, bright red, about a mile to their left. 

 

Nana’s flare. 

 

“That way,” Derek growled, already running towards the light. 

 

\-- 

 

Nana and Sandy were standing on watch, their backs to the the tree Melissa and Stiles were huddled under, when Derek arrived. Derek moved passed them without much thought, all he could focus on was that Stiles was being held in Melissa’s arms. He didn’t smell blood, but he could smell salt. 

 

Stiles had been crying. 

 

“Stiles,” Derek said, dropping to his knees beside the pair, “Stiles, are you okay? What happened?” 

 

“D’rek, I’m sorrry,” Stiles slurred, “It wasn’t me.” 

 

“I know, baby,” Derek said, running his hand down Stiles back, “I know it wasn’t you, you wouldn’t have come out here if it was.” 

 

But Stiles was still crying, tears streaming down his face like he hadn’t even heard Derek speaking. “I’ve been sober, Derek. I wouldn’t  _ do _ this.” 

 

That gave Derek pause. He looked to Melissa, who pointedly tipped her head towards the tree. Derek turned to see bottles of wine propped up there, all of them empty. 

 

“Oh, Stiles…” 

 

“It wasn’t  _ me _ .” 

 

“I know, I know, baby, I know, you would never do this.” Derek inched forward again, taking Stiles from Melissa and picking him up into his arms. “You can rest now, I’ve got you.” 

 

Derek stood, cradling Stiles against his chest. Stiles slurred a few more words of protest, before he shut his eyes and fell asleep. Derek was dreading the moment he woke up again. 

 

All the work… for someone to rip it away from him like that. Derek suppressed a growl, and wished he could beat up a ghost. 

 

Andy and Jenny came crashing through the trees a moment later. “Did you find him? Is he okay?” 

 

“He’s drunk,” Melissa said, picking up the empty bottles. 

 

“Whoever possessed him this time knew his weakness,” Nana said. “This is not a good sign.” 

 

“If he was possessed,” Melissa said. 

 

“Of course he was,” Derek growled, “Stiles would never get drunk, not like this.” 

 

Melissa shrugged, “I was married to an alcoholic for a long time, Derek. I’m not saying this was Stiles, but if it was, it’s okay. It’s a relapse, they happen. He can work through it.” 

 

“He didn’t relapse,” Derek snarled, clutching the man in his arms. “He would  _ never- _ ” 

 

“Derek,” Marco placed a hand on his shoulder. “We’ll talk to Stiles when he wakes up, alright? I’m sure you're right, but we’ll know more in the morning. For now let’s head back home.” 

 

“Fine,” Derek snapped, stomping back towards the den. 

 

Melissa would see, when Stiles woke up. Stiles would never do this. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Stiles is possessed again, and wakes up drunk. Discovers that someone has been causing the dreams he's been having and is stalking him/gathering information on him. 
> 
> Derek panics because Stiles goes missing while he is possessed. 
> 
> \--
> 
> Thanks for reading everyone! Next chapter will be in a few days :)


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings at the bottom my friends. 
> 
> Only three more chapters after this!

Stiles woke up with a groan. His head was pounding, and his mouth tasted like ass. The last time he had felt this shitty, he had been… it had been in New York and- 

 

Stiles' eyes snapped open and he tried to sit up, but a hand pushed him back down. 

 

“It’s okay, you’re safe,” a Derek’s voice whispered above him. Stiles relaxed back into his pillows, a hand coming up to his head. If Derek was here, everything was fine. 

 

He felt a tiny tail smack against his arm and he knew Charlie was here too. Stiles blindly reached for the dog, feeling better having Charlie under his hand. 

 

“What happened?” 

 

A warm hand caressed his cheek, and a second later the pain was drained away. Stiles sighed in relief.

 

“What’s the last thing you remember?” Derek asked a moment later, drawing his hand back. 

 

Stiles sat up a bit, resting against their headboard. “I was sitting around the fire, with you. And then… I was in the white space. I talked to Peter.” 

 

Derek scowled, “do you think Peter had anything to do with it?” 

 

“No. If anything, it sounded like he was trying to warn me about something… not that I trust him enough to believe him. What happened, though? I don’t remember waking up out of it,” Stiles glanced around, but it was just the two of them in their bedroom. “Is everyone okay? Did I-” 

 

“Everyone’s fine. And you were possessed, Stiles, whatever happened last night was not your fault. It wasn’t you.” 

 

Stiles felt a knot start to form in his stomach, “so something did happen, last night?” 

 

Derek grimaced, he turned away to grab a glass of water off the nightstand. Stiles knew a diversion when he saw one, “Derek, what happened?” 

 

“Someone took your body into the woods and drank three bottles of wine.” 

 

Stiles felt his blood run cold. “They got me drunk.” 

 

“Yes. It was you by the time we found you, but you were sobbing and incoherent. I’m not surprised you don’t remember it.” 

 

“Derek, I didn’t,” Stiles bit his lip, “I didn’t have anything to drink last night, not by choice. I haven’t had a drink since New York, I swear.” 

 

“I know, baby, I believe you,” Derek shushed him, running a hand over his hair. “I’m sorry they did this to you. I’m sorry I didn’t notice anything was wrong when the person wearing your face stood up and said they were grabbing a drink, I should have seen it wasn’t you, I should have-”

 

“Hey, it’s okay.” Stiles said, grabbing Derek’s hand. “Whoever it was, they were prepared. They know my weaknesses and they know how to fool you. They’re good. It’s not your fault.” 

 

Derek nodded, but Stiles knew Derek still blamed himself. Derek took a breath though and his face shifted, he looked less miserable and more hopeful, a smile tugging on his lips. 

 

“Melissa said it might have been you, last night. She said everyone relapses, but I knew better. I know you haven’t gone anywhere near drugs or alcohol since you got clean, and I’m really proud of you for that.” 

 

Stiles wished he hadn’t been hung over when Derek said that. He wished he’d had a good nights sleep, and was prepared for this conversation at 8 in the morning on a gloomy spring day, but he wasn’t. And that’s why he slipped. 

 

Derek noticed immediately when Stiles heart stuttered, which his eyes shifted to the side guiltily, and his smile grew stiff. 

 

He noticed, and Stiles didn’t know what to do to stop this conversation from happening. 

 

He didn’t think he could stop it, at this point. 

 

“Stiles?” Derek frowned down at him. “You haven’t, I would have noticed if… have you done anything since you got clean?” 

 

“No.” 

 

Derek stood up and backed away from him. They both knew Stiles was lying. 

 

“When?” Derek whispered. 

 

“A few months ago,” Stiles said, grabbing Charlie when the dog started whining beside him. “When I was going to therapy a few times a week, and I was reliving every shitty thing that had ever happened to me, and it was just- it was really hard, Derek.” Stiles felt his eyes start to sting, but he refused to let himself cry. Derek was still on the other side of the room, and he deserved the truth. This wasn’t about Stiles right now. “There was a day when you went with Cora and Marco to meet up with the other Oregon pack, and Andy, Lisa and Isaac were all working, and Lucinda was busy with Izzy and I just… I went into town, and I hunted down a dealer. A bought a baggie of coke, and I drove home. I took a hit in the car as soon as I parked. Then I came inside, hid the bag, and got in the shower. You weren’t back until the early morning, and it was out of my system by then, I guess, because you didn’t notice… ” Stiles sniffed, angrily wiping the tears that fell down his cheek. “I hated myself as soon as I did it. I regretted it the moment I snorted that shit, I swear. I haven’t done it again.” 

 

Stiles looked up, but Derek wasn’t looking at him. He was staring angrily at the ground, his eyes glowing blue. 

 

It felt like hours before he spoke, “you kept it?” 

 

Stiles closed his eyes, “yes.” 

 

“Where is it?” 

 

“Taped behind the toilet tank.” 

 

Derek let out a growl and stalked towards the bathroom. Stiles didn’t move, but he knew Derek had found it and disposed of it when he heard the toilet flush. A moment later, the front door slammed shut, and Stiles knew Derek had left. 

 

He didn’t hold back his tears anymore, as he curled around his dog and cried into the sheets. 

 

\-- 

 

When Stiles opened his eyes again, it was to a hand rubbing circles on his back just like his parents had always done when he was upset as a kid. He rolled over and saw his dad sitting at the edge of his bed, looking down at him with concern in his eyes. 

 

“Talk to me, kid.” His dad said. 

 

So he did. 

 

He opened his mouth and everything came pouring out. He told his dad how terrifying it was, not knowing what was going to happen every time he closed his eyes at night. How much it had hurt to see his mom, but how it hurt even more that she had only come to see him once. He told his dad that he didn’t think the necromancy thing was real, that he was pretty sure he was just fucked up and there wasn’t anyone else like him out there. He was alone in this.  

 

He told his dad about his fight with Derek this morning. How Stiles had slipped months ago and hadn’t told anyone. 

 

He talked until his throat was sore, and his face was tear streaked, and his dad had to go to the kitchen to get him more water. 

 

When he came back Stiles found himself bundled up in a classic Stilinski bear hug. He hugged back just as tight. 

 

“I don’t know about all this magic stuff, but I do know one thing, kiddo. You’re a fighter. You always have been.” John pressed a hand to the back of Stiles' head, “you keep fighting, you hear me? Even if the necro-whatever doesn’t turn out, you fight this. You fight your way back. Because I need you here with me, and I know it might not seem like it now, but Derek needs you too. And we’re both fighting along with you, okay? All of us are.” 

 

“Okay, Dad.” 

 

“And for the other stuff…” his dad sighed. “You’ve had a hard life, kid. I wish you hadn’t, I wish I had been there, but it’s true. And you’re going to slip somethings, but it’s okay. You’re okay.”

 

They didn’t let go of each other for a long time, after that. Not even when Charlie weaseled his way into his dad’s lap to join in. 

 

\-- 

 

Stiles went to the big house with his dad. He wasn’t sure if he should be surprised or relieved that no one was there. He knew they must have been around somewhere, but they were giving him space. 

 

He hoped they weren’t mad at him. 

 

He and his dad made egg sandwiches, like they used to when he was growing up. They sat and ate them in silence. Stiles felt comforted to know his dad had his back, like always. No matter what, he would at least always have his dad. 

 

When they were almost finished Melissa and Nana walked in. Melissa squeezed Stiles shoulder, and Lucinda ruffled his hair. Neither of them said anything, but it settled something in him. If these two weren’t mad at him, chances were the others weren’t either. 

 

It would be okay. 

 

After Nana and Melissa, the wolves started to come in too. It was almost like they had been waiting for the all clear. Isaac was quick to pull Stiles into a hug, and Cora affectionately punched his shoulder. 

 

“You scared us, you dork.” She snapped, before pulling him in for a hug too. 

 

Stiles bit his lip, “sorry.” 

 

“It wasn’t your fault.” 

 

“Yeah, but-” 

 

“No buts!” Cora let him go, so Lisa and Marco could get their own hugs in. And then Andy swooped in as well. 

 

“You’re all being so nice,” Stiles said into Andy’s shoulder, before reluctantly pulling away. “Did Derek tell you… do you know about -” 

 

“We know about your relapse, Stiles,” Marco said, resting a hand on Stiles' arm. “We also know you only used once. It’s understandable, given everything you’ve been through.” 

 

“But…” Stiles ran a hand through his hair, “I kept it! I didn’t tell anyone about it! Aren’t you guys, I don’t know, mad?” 

 

“I don’t know about your pack,” Melissa said, “but I’m not upset. I’m not even surprised. Drug addiction is hard, and a lot of people slip. It’s okay - as long as you don’t keep slipping. As long as you turn to your support system instead of to the drugs. Which, from what I can tell, is what you did.” 

 

“But…” 

 

“What did I just say about buts?” Cora grinned at him. 

 

“We aren’t mad.” Lisa said, pulling Stiles into another hug. “Sad, maybe, that you didn’t feel like you could come to us with this, but not mad. We all know what those drugs did to you. I’d rather stay up all night with you, fighting cravings or urges or whatever it is, than to see you go through that again.” 

 

“Yeah, man, talk to us.” Andy said, “we’re all here for you.” 

 

Stiles nodded, hugging Lisa tight. 

 

\-- 

 

They were all settled in the living room, Stiles tucked between Lisa and his dad, when Stiles started peering around behind them. Everyone was here, except for the one person he needed to talk to. He had a feeling Derek wasn’t going to be walking into the room on his own anytime soon, but Stiles couldn’t help glancing at the door every few minutes just in case anyway. 

 

“He’s working on the barn,” Cora said, her swollen feet propped up on the coffee table. 

 

Stiles didn’t even bother pretending he hadn’t been itching to go find him. “Is he pissed?” 

 

Cora waved a hand in a maybe gesture, “I think he’s mostly mad at himself, for not noticing.” 

 

“That’s ridiculous.” 

 

“When is my brother ever not ridiculous?” 

 

Stiles sighed, she had a point. 

 

“He’s been out there for a while, he’s probably calmed down a bit now. Less wood throwing, more actually hammering from the sound of it,” Isaac said, his head cocked as he listened to the noises outside. “I think you’re safe to go.” 

 

Stiles wiggled his way off the couch. Neither Lisa, nor his dad, seemed happy to see him go. “Try not to listen in too much.” He said to the wolves as he made his way to the door. 

 

“We would never!” Cora said. 

 

“Like I want to hear the gross stuff you two are going to do after,” Isaac grumbled. 

 

“What gross stuff?” Izzy asked him. Stiles snickered at Isaac’s face as he left the building. 

 

He took calming breaths as he walked the short distance between the house and the barn. Halfway there he started to hear the hammering Isaac had been talking about. It was a little louder than usual, like Derek was hitting the nail extra hard, but that was okay. 

 

At least it didn’t sound like anything was breaking. 

 

“Hello?” Stiles called out as he reached the open barn door. It was still a dull brown colour, but Stiles knew Derek had plans to paint it red. Even now he could see new support beams, and a cut out for where a new window would be. “Place is already looking better.” He said, because he knew Derek could hear him. Even if the man still hadn’t stopped hammering. 

 

Stiles sighed and took a seat on the lawn chair that sat beside the door. This was where Cora sat to ‘supervise’. It could be where Stiles sat to wait Derek out. 

 

He didn’t have to wait long. 

 

The hammering stopped a minute later, and then a minute after that Derek was in the doorway, his face set in a mask and a hammer twirling in one hand. If Stiles didn’t know him, he would think Derek was planning on bashing him in the face in anger. But he knew Derek. He knew Derek better than he knew anyone else on Earth. 

 

This was what Derek looked like when he was nervous. 

 

“Hey,” Stiles said softly, sitting up in the chair. 

 

Derek didn’t say anything. He did drop the hammer into the grass though, choosing to cross his arms defensively instead. 

 

“I’m sorry,” Stiles said, “I’m sorry I used. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about it… I’m sorry I kept it.” 

 

Derek grunted. Stiles wasn’t sure what that meant, but he felt like he had said the wrong thing. 

 

“I’m sorry I… hid it from you.” He added on. Derek shook his head. 

 

“Okay, I… I’m sorry I hurt you, alright? For all of the above, I’m just sorry-” 

 

“I don’t want you to apologize!” Derek finally said, turning towards him with glowing blue eyes. 

 

Stiles stood up. “Right, well, I promise that I won’t do it again then. How’s that? I promise I won’t ever touch that stuff again.” 

 

“I don’t want your promises either.” Derek snapped. 

 

“Then what?” Stiles asked, “what do you want me to say? Tell me what to do to make this better, Derek, I’ll do anything!” 

 

“I want you to not have done it!” Derek growled. “Or to have told me about it! I want you to have trusted me with this!” 

 

Stiles sagged, running a hand through his hair in frustration, “I can’t go back in time, Derek.” 

 

“I know that,” Derek snarled, “but I’ve been running that night over and over in my head and I can’t even - it was so insignificant to me, I barely remember coming home to you. I can’t remember what you smelled like, but I should have noticed. I should have known. You should have told me!” 

 

“I know,” Stiles said, holding up his hands in defeat, “I know I fucked up. I already promised the pack I won’t do this again, I’ll talk to someone, okay? I won’t ever do this again.” 

 

“I don’t care if you talk to  _ someone _ , I want you to talk to  _ me _ !” 

 

Stiles blinked, surprised, “Derek... “ 

 

Derek stomped up to him. His eyes were still glowing blue, but Stiles could see now that it wasn’t out of anger, it was out of fear. Now that they were facing each other head on, Derek looked terrified. 

 

Stiles hated that he had done this to him. 

 

“I’m the one who holds you through your nightmares every night. I’m the one who has been there for you, through all of this.  _ Why didn’t you trust me? _ ” 

 

“I do,” Stiles insisted, “I do, Derek I-” Stiles was at a loss of words. For once in his life, he really didn’t know what to say. 

 

So he grabbed Derek’s face and pressed their mouths together. 

 

Derek responded by grabbing him and dragging him into his arms. Stiles jumped up, wrapped his legs around Derek’s waste. 

 

The kiss was deep and dirty. Their tongues fought for dominance in their mouths, and Stiles only broke it off to mouth at Derek’s neck instead, teeth grazing the sensitive skin there. 

 

Before he even realized they were inside, Derek was dropping him on the bed. Tugging Stiles pants off as well as his own. Stiles threw his shirt to the side as Derek grabbed the lube. 

 

“Is this okay, Stiles?” Derek asked, already covering his fingers. “What’s your colour, baby?” 

 

“Green, green all the way.” Stiles replied, already scrambling to get on his hands and knees. 

 

Derek didn’t waste anymore time getting his fingers inside of him. He kissed Stiles back as he worked him open. His other hand trailing up and down his legs. 

 

Stiles moaned into his pillow. 

 

When Derek had three fingers in, Stiles twisted around. “It’s good. Fuck me, get inside me.” 

 

Derek pulled his fingers out, quickly adding more lube to his cock before lining up. “Ready?” 

 

“Fuck, yes.” 

 

Derek pushed in gently. He pushed and kissed up Stiles back, one hand on Stiles hip, thumb caressing lovingly. 

 

After Derek bottomed out, things got rougher. They both moved their hips, meeting each other thrust for thrust. Derek dug his fingers, which had just been so soft, into the bone of his hip. Stiles had to put an arm against the headboard to keep himself from bashing his head on it. 

 

“Fuck, yes, yes,” Stiles cried, “you fuck me so good.” 

 

Derek didn’t say anything, he grunted as he fucked into Stiles even faster. 

 

Stiles orgasm hit him like a force. He didn’t even have a hand on his cock, he came completely untouched. That had never happened before. 

 

Not that he was really thinking about that now. He was too blissed out to care. His arms collapsed under him, but Derek kept a hold of his hips, keeping him on his knees. 

 

Derek came soon after, Stiles name on his lips. He pulled out slowly, collapsing onto the bed beside him, dragging Stiles against his chest. 

 

He kissed the back of Stiles neck. 

 

“I love you,” Stiles said, gripping the hand that curled around his waist. 

 

“I love you, too,” Derek whispered against his neck. “Always.” 

 

\-- 

 

The two of them stayed like that for a long time, until Derek’s stomach let them know they needed food. Derek went out in search of something while Stiles showered. 

 

He thought about what Derek had said.  _ Always _ . 

 

A part of him was relieved. Derek found out about the coke, and everything was still okay. They were still okay. But another part of him… the part of him that was starting to doubt a lot of things… that part of him was worried. 

 

Because he was starting to wonder if this was what Peter had meant, last night in limbo, when he said the Stiles he knew would never put Derek and Cora through all of this. Derek was never going to leave him - no matter what Stiles did. No matter how much it hurt, or held him back, Derek was going to stay… 

 

Stiles was starting to wonder if that was a good thing after all. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Stiles talks about a time he relapsed without Derek noticing.   
> Derek and Stiles have a fight, and then they have angry/make up sex. 
> 
> \-- 
> 
> Thanks for reading! :) Hope you're enjoying the angst!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry friends, things are going to get worse before they get better. 
> 
> Two more chapters after this. <3 
> 
>  
> 
> I don't have any specific warnings for this chapter. Same talk of past abuse/Stiles being tired/possession

Things got worse, after that night. 

 

Talia had warned them, weeks ago, that someone was trying to work their way to the surface. That someone had a plan. Peter had warned Stiles too, in his own creepy way. 

 

And it looked like, now, that plan was in motion. 

 

Ever since the night of the party, Stiles was being possessed on a daily basis. By anyone who knew how to get into his head… which was everyone he had talked to in limbo, apparently. 

 

They never knew who was going to come through next. 

 

Stiles didn’t help at the restaurant anymore. He didn’t go to therapy anymore either. He couldn’t even go grocery shopping. Stiles was forced to stay at home, on pack land, because they never knew if Stiles would be taken over while he was out. 

 

It was safest, for everyone, if he stayed in one place… and always with a monitor. 

 

The pack was being nice about it. Derek usually was the one who stayed by his side, but they all took turns making sure Derek looked after himself as well. His dad and Melissa wanted to stay to help too, but they both still had jobs to get back to. 

Even though his dad had offered to quit his job and stay, Stiles turned him down. He didn’t want his dad to see him like this anyway. 

 

It was bad enough that the pack had to see him like this. 

 

So his dad and Melissa had gone home. The pack had continued on with their normal lives, keeping an eye on Stiles as much as they could, and Stiles…. Stiles was forced to give up everything, because he wasn’t around enough to even watch a full movie on Netflix. 

 

He hated it. 

 

Stiles never knew who was in his body, and the pack didn’t always tell him. They were trying to spare him his feelings, he knew, but he would hate it either way. He wished he could at least know who was violating his body, his mind. 

 

Or maybe he didn’t wish that. Maybe they were right to hide it from him. 

 

He didn’t know anything anymore.

 

Derek and the pack are supportive, so supportive, but there’s nothing they could do to stop it. Nana’s teas weren’t doing anything anymore, and Dr. Patel hadn’t been answering their calls. 

 

The more days that pass, the longer Stiles was spending alone. In the white space. And the only thing he could bring with him are his thoughts. 

 

His thoughts were much darker, these days 

 

He thought about what Peter said. How Derek acts around him. He thought about the people he had met in limbo, and felt sick to think one of them was in his body right now. 

 

He thought about how it felt to be high on the streets of New York City, blissfully unaware of the power that was inside of him. 

 

He thought of all these things - and in his darkest moments, wished he could bring it all to an end. 

 

At least if he were dead, he would be able to move on and out of this place. 

 

—

 

Derek was freaking out. 

 

His boyfriend, his  _ mate _ , was disappearing in front of his eyes. Even on good days, when Stiles was only gone for a few minutes, Stiles was never really… here, anymore. His Stiles was getting buried underneath everything else. His Stiles was drowning. 

 

The Stiles in front of him now had tired eyes, and smelled like misery. The Stiles Derek tried to curl up with every night lay limp in his arms, exhaustion radiating off him in waves. 

 

The Stiles in front of him now… didn’t look like he could make it through this much longer. 

 

So yes, Derek was freaking out. 

 

He spent every moment possible at his mates side, and when he couldn’t, when someone was in there that he just couldn’t… he had one of the pack keep him updated, on those days. 

 

Most of the time it was fine. Bittersweet, in a lot of ways. Cora got the chance to reconnect with Laura, through Stiles. Derek and Isaac got to have one last conversation with Erica and Boyd. 

 

But when Theo or Kate came through? There was no talking. They simply locked Stiles body in the basement and kept a guard on him. 

 

Nana’s theory was that one of the dead was trying to take over his body:  _ permanently _ .  

 

It wasn’t hard to guess it was one of the terrible two. His money was on Kate, but he wouldn’t be surprised if it was Theo. Theo’s entire life mission had been to ruin Stiles. It wouldn’t surprise him if that had carried on into his death too. 

 

Now they were sitting in their cottage, just the two of them, on the loveseat that fit in their small den. Charlie was curled up by their feet, and Stiles had a book propped up in his lap. Derek didn’t think he was reading it though. His eyes were almost closed. 

 

He sighed. They couldn’t keep living like this. 

 

“I’m going to go make a call, okay?” Derek said. Stiles grunted in reply, but didn’t say anything. It was a strange role reversal that Derek did not like. 

 

He went to the kitchen to make the call. He didn’t want Stiles out of his sight. 

 

It took two missed calls, and three rings into the third, before Priya picked up. Her hello sounded breathless. 

 

“Where have you been?” Derek snarled into the phone, “We’ve been calling you for days. Have you found him?” Derek asked. He was passed niceties. 

 

“No, but I’m close. I can feel it.” 

 

Derek leaned against the counter, rubbing his eyes, “it’s getting worse, Priya. Stiles is barely here.” 

 

“I’m close, I promise. All I had to go on where his initials, and the fact that he was somewhere in Asia. But I’m close now, I’ll find him before… I’ll find him in time.” 

 

Derek sighed, he had no choice but to trust her. She was their only lead. “You better get back here with him in time, too.” 

 

“I will.” 

 

“What am I supposed to do in the meantime? Stiles is… he’s possessed, half the time. The other half of the time he’s so exhausted, or depressed, he can’t even get off the couch.” 

 

“Just be there for him, Derek. Support him. Tell him you love him. Maybe get him to go out for a walk with you and Charlie? I’ll be there within a week with someone who can fix this. Don’t lose hope now.” 

 

Derek seriously doubted all of this would be resolved in a week, but he said okay anyway. They said their goodbyes and Derek hung up. 

 

This whole situation was shit. 

 

Derek glanced up when Charlie let out a whine. The front door was open, and Stiles was missing. 

 

“Shit-” Derek hissed, running out of the kitchen. He grabbed Charlie on the way and bolted out of the house, sniffing the air for Stiles. 

 

He couldn’t track him. 

 

“Stiles!” Derek shouted, frantic. He ran for the trees, but didn’t see any trace of him there. He ran to the cars, to see if they had taken the truck. God, if they had taken the truck, Stiles could be anywhere by now. He could be- 

 

“Derek!” Lisa called out to him. “We’ve got him!” 

 

Derek felt himself deflate, “good. Where is he?” 

 

Lisa winced as Derek walked towards her, “in the big house, we uh, caught him sneaking a bottle of Scotch.” 

 

Derek paused mid step, right before he reached her. “Was it… was Stiles trying to-” 

 

“It wasn’t Stiles,” Lisa said. “We think it’s the woman, Kate.” 

 

Derek growled. He passed Charlie over when the dog started to whine again. 

 

He couldn’t let Kate get away with this. 

 

He knew it had to be either Theo or Kate that had gotten Stiles drunk in the woods that night. The two people had ruined their lives so much already, Derek wanted to murder them both all over again. They had too much power over them. It was too much. 

 

Derek had thought they were passed this, were finally moving on from their traumas. Finally healing. He had even started thinking about proposing…  and now Kate was trying to ruin his life all over again? 

 

Well, no more. Derek was putting a stop to this. 

 

Derek marched into the house and ran into Isaac. “Where is she?”

 

Isaac raised his hands, “Derek, you know you don’t like seeing Stiles like this-” 

 

“ _ She _ is not Stiles,” Derek snarled. “Is she in the basement?” He didn’t wait for a reply, he headed for the stairs. 

 

“Derek-” 

 

“I’ll be fine!” 

 

He took the stairs two at a time. Marco was waiting for him at the bottom. “I have her handcuffed to the wall,” he said, motioning to where Stiles body sat, leaning against the wall. One hand was cuffed to a ring on the floorboard. If Stiles was really there, that wouldn’t hold him for long. 

 

From experience, they knew Kate didn’t know how to pick a lock. 

 

“I support you in confronting her,” Marco said, “but I’m not leaving you alone down here.” 

 

“That’s fine,” Derek said, stepping around his Alpha. He crouched down in front of Stiles body, just out of reach. His wolf whined when eyes turned on him. 

 

The cold eyes of Kate, not the warm eyes of Stiles. 

 

He didn’t turn away. “What do you want, Kate?” 

 

“Oooh, look at you, Derek. Coming in hot.” Kate grinned at him with Stiles lips. Derek was disgusted. 

 

“Answer the question.” 

 

“I don’t want anything, I’m just having a little fun.” She winked at him. 

 

Derek growled, “fun? Getting Stiles drunk is fun to you? Violating someone else’s body is fun to you. I guess I did know that already.” 

 

“Well, first of all, that wasn’t me who got Stiles drunk,” Kate smirked. “I did think that was pretty funny though. Wanted to see if I could pull it off myself. And second, I hardly violated you, Derek. Last I checked, you were a very willing participant.” 

 

“Who was underage, and being manipulated.” 

 

Kate grinned, “best sex of your life though, wasn’t it? I know I would give it another round.” 

 

Derek rolled his eyes, “no, actually, it was mediocre at best. The only reason I enjoyed it to begin with was because I didn’t know any better.” 

 

Kate glared, “don’t lie to me, Derek, we have too much history for you to-” 

 

“We have nothing,” Derek cut her off, rising to his feet. “You and me, are  _ nothing _ . Do you honestly think I’ve been sitting around thinking about you all this time? Here’s the reality Kate, I don’t think about you. I don’t care about what we did when I was a teenager. I accepted my part in my family’s death long ago, and moved on. You are nothing but an annoyance now.” 

 

“Really?” Kate scoffed, “Derek, you just said I ‘violated’ you. I killed your whole family. I won Beacon Hills and defeated the Hales for the hunters. I  _ won _ . Don’t lie and tell me I’m nothing.” 

 

Derek crossed his arms, “the Hales are hardly defeated, we’re still going strong. Beacon Hills still has a wolf pack in it. I’m healthy and happy, and in a loving relationship. You didn’t win shit.”

 

Kate’s eyes narrowed, “ _ Derek- _ ” 

 

“ _ Kate _ , give up. You think you’re having fun here, taunting me, or tormenting me or whatever, but you’re not. All you’re doing is making an embarrassment of yourself, and wasting all of our time. But go ahead, stay in that body. Stiles will find his way back eventually.” 

 

Kate’s eyes widened in shock for a second, before she quickly schooled her expression into a smirk. “You really think Stiles can pull himself back? Maybe I’ll stay. Maybe I won’t ever let him-” 

 

“Stiles will find a way. He always does.” 

 

Without another word, Derek turned around and walked back up the stairs. He ignored Kate’s screams behind him. 

 

He’d said what he had to say. 

 

\-- 

 

Kate never came back. 

 

Now, it was only Theo and Laura that come through. Which should be a relief, if not for how often they are coming. 

 

“I come as often as I can, because we know someone else is pushing to get through,” Laura said, sitting on the couch in the big house with Izzy on her lap. The pack were all sitting around the living room after lunch when Laura came through. They were calm, knowing it was at least an ally possessing Stiles this time. “I wish I didn’t have to, but we can’t figure out who it is on our end.” 

 

“Theo is still around a lot. Do you think it’s him?” Lisa asked, leaning forward intently. 

 

“I don’t know,” Laura shook her head, “it’s hard to tell, especially since none of us are actually in limbo. Well, Peter is, I guess, but he doesn’t really talk to us. I’m pretty sure he’s working on another way to get back to Earth.” 

 

“Of course he is,” Cora said, frowning. “He can never help, can he? Always has to think of himself.” 

 

“Don’t get me wrong, I completely agree, but Peter’s not who I want to talk about.” Laura turned to Derek, her expression worried. Derek’s wolf whined to see that expression on Stiles face. “I’m worried, Derek. Stiles body is feeling more tired with each passing day.” 

 

The pack all took this news in concerned silence. Derek ran a hand through his hair, “I know. But Stiles is strong, he’ll pull through.” 

 

“Yeah, he always does.” Andy said. He didn’t sound very sure of himself though. 

 

Derek wasn’t sure if anyone else actually believed Stiles would get through this but him. 

 

\-- 

 

Derek sat on one of Nana’s work stools, clutching a mug of tea. Stiles was at home, asleep, with Charlie, Isaac and Lisa watching over him. Derek hated leaving his side, but he had to talk to someone about this. 

 

Someone who had some idea of what was actually going on. 

 

“He’s losing himself, isn’t he? Into limbo.” Derek said to his tea. Nana hummed beside him. 

 

“It’s a possibility.” She agreed, tipping her head to the side, “it’s hard to tell. My magic doesn’t correlate with his. Not anymore.” 

 

Derek turned to her, “but your teas worked. They were working, before. Maybe if you made something else, then-” 

 

Nana was already shaking her head though. “Stiles refused my offer to make another tea. I’ve still been working on it but… it’s up to him. I can’t force anything on him. And even if I did, there’s no guarantee it would work.” 

 

Derek turned back to the mug in his hands, his heart heavy. “Then what will we do next?” 

 

“What happens next,” Nana said gently, “is up to Stiles.” 

 

Derek was afraid she would say that. 

 

\-- 

 

Stiles sat at his kitchen table, alone save for Charlie lying at his feet. Derek was asleep in the other room. Stiles knew he was tired, always trying to stay vigilant to watch over Stiles, so he was glad Derek was asleep. 

 

Mornings like this were the only time he was alone, now. 

 

He had pages laid out in front of him, all covered in dark ink. Stiles had been working on these for the past two hours. 

 

Letters for his family, his pack. 

 

Letters to say goodbye. 

 

He felt different now, than he had even a week ago. His body was here, but his mind didn’t feel connected. Even now, writing these letters, he felt like he was in a dream. He felt like he was floating in the white space, with nothing to hold onto. 

 

He felt like one of these times, he wasn’t going to be able to come back. 

 

He was never going to feel grounded again. 

 

Stiles wanted to leave something behind, for each of them. Each person who had stood by him through all his shit. His drug use. His black outs. His battle with Theo. His dad’s recovery. And now this? He couldn’t put into words how much he appreciated them, how sorry he was for putting them through all of this, but he tried. 

 

He tried. 

 

Derek’s was the hardest. 

 

When he heard Derek stirring in the bedroom, Stiles quickly folded up the pages. He shoved them into the top shelf of the closet, a place only used for Stiles collection of hats and scarves. Derek rarely looked here. 

 

He hoped that meant Derek would only find them when he really gone. He couldn’t bear to watch Derek read through it now. 

 

“What are you doing?” 

 

Fuck. 

 

“Just, putting some stuff away.” Stiles said, closing the closet door. 

 

“Stiles?” 

 

He hated that Derek had to ask that. Hated that he sounded so unsure all the time now. So lost. 

 

“Yeah, it’s me.” He turned to Derek, walked right into his arms and welcomed the good morning hug. It was perfect. 

 

Perfect moments were so rare, nowadays.

 

“What were you putting away?” 

 

Jesus, Derek, just let it go. “Some stuff.” 

 

Derek didn’t let it go. He walked around Stiles and opened the closet, much to Stiles dismay, and immediately found the letters. 

 

“What is this?” 

 

Stiles sighed. 

 

“Stiles, what are these?” Derek obviously knew what they were though, because he was reading them now. His face looked pissed. 

 

“Letters. Saying goodbye.” Stiles shoved his hands into his hoodie. He hated that they were talking about this. 

 

“Goodbye?” Derek asked, deadpan. “Why are you saying goodbye?” 

 

“You know, just in case.” 

 

“In case of what?” Derek was growling now, his eyes boring into him, “are you giving up?” 

 

“No!” Stiles insisted, stepping towards him. Derek didn’t back away, so that was a good sign. “No, of course not, I just… I don’t know how much longer I can do this.” 

 

“You can do it, Stiles,” Derek insisted, shoving the letters back into the closet and wrapping Stiles into his arms. “I know you can. You’re strong. So strong.” 

 

“Derek. That doesn’t mean I can defeat everything that comes my way. Everyone has a breaking point.” Stiles was tired, so tired. He wished Derek could see that. 

 

“But you aren’t at yours yet.” Derek insisted. 

 

Stiles didn’t know what to say, he didn’t want to argue about this. So he reached up and kissed him. 

 

The kiss was long, and Stiles turned his head to deepen it. Derek responded in kind, moving his hands up Stiles back. Stiles pushed his fingers under Derek’s shirt, feeling his muscles shift and- 

 

Derek pulled away. 

 

“What are you doing?” 

 

Stiles frowned, “kissing you.” 

 

“Stiles, you can’t just,” Derek took a step back. He looked frustrated. “We can’t just have sex everytime we start to fight!” 

 

“But I don’t want to fight!” Stiles said, sagging under the weight of it all. “I’m tired, Derek, I don’t want to fight.” 

 

“So we were going to have sex instead?” Derek shook his head. “I don’t want sex to be a- an avoidance tactic for us. It’s special, to me. I thought it was the same for you.” 

 

“It is, you know it is.” Stiles tried to step towards him, but Derek stepped back. Stiles sighed and moved to the loveseat instead. “I want to be close with you, Derek.” 

 

“I can’t do this, right now,” Derek moved to the door. “I’ll send someone else over to keep an eye on you.” 

 

The door closed, and Derek was gone. So much for Stiles perfect moment. 

 

Stiles rolled his head back to the back of the couch. He stared up at the ceiling and felt like shit. 

 

He was starting to think that maybe someone else should take over this stupid body of his. All he had ever done with it was fuck everything up. 

 

Maybe someone else could do better. 

 

\-- 

 

Derek was angry, but he didn’t want to be. He only had so much time with Stiles, when he was really  _ Stiles _ , and he didn’t want to waste it on anger. 

 

But sometimes Stiles still had this idea that sex was just something to use, or that his body was the solution to a problem, and Derek…. Hated that. He hated that every experience Stiles had with sex before him was bad. 

 

He hated that he couldn’t erase it. 

 

He ran in the woods to cool off. He phone pinged with a text, but ignored it. The pack could look after Stiles for an hour without him. He didn’t need to know if Laura or Theo have arrived. 

 

He ran until his head was more clear. Until his anger had faded, and he could be in the same room as Stiles without wanting to shake some sense into him. 

 

When he finished his run near the front door of the big house, he was met with a Lisa and Andy’s  concerned faces. 

 

“What’s wrong?” He asked, already rushing forward. “Is it Stiles? Did something-” 

 

“Stiles is fine,” Lisa said, grabbing his arm. “Or, his body is at least. We have him in the living room, being watched.” 

 

Derek relaxed. “Then what’s wrong? Is it Theo?” 

 

“No, it’s” Andy shifted nervously. “It’s someone else. Someone you all knew in Beacon Hills.” 

 

“Erica? Boyd?” 

 

“Derek,” Isaac said from the doorway, “it’s Allison.” 


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Congrats to everyone who called it :) 
> 
> One chapter left! I'm still in the process of writing it, but it should be up in the next week or so.

Derek was relieved, for a few hours, that Allison was here. Allison was someone they knew, someone Stiles and Isaac had both trusted. Derek never got to know her, but that didn’t matter. 

 

She was an ally. That’s all they needed right now. 

 

It was only when the sun started to set that Derek started feeling uneasy. 

 

“You’ve been here all day,” Derek said, watching as Allison lounged on the couch in the big house’s living room. She did it in a graceful way that Stiles could never pull off. It looked unnatural, with Stiles body. 

 

“Yeah, I guess I have,” Allison laughed, “is that weird? How often does this usually last?” 

 

“A few hours, at the most.” Derek said, crossing his arms. She had been here longer than anyone so far. Derek wanted Stiles back. He needed to talk to him. 

 

“I guess I’ll be gone by the morning then,” Allison smiled at him. Derek narrowed his eyes at her. 

 

He didn’t like this. 

 

That night they set her up in the guest room that John and Melissa usually stayed in. She smiled and waved them away, closing the door behind them. 

 

Derek hated it. He was leaving Stiles alone with this woman. She could do anything to him. 

 

And now he had to go sleep with Charlie alone. 

 

By Charlie’s constant whines throughout the night, he didn’t think the dog liked it either. 

 

\-- 

 

Allison was still there in the morning. The entire pack walked around her in confusion, watching as she cheerfully made herself a bowl of cereal. 

 

Something wasn’t right. 

 

“This body feels so tired,” Allison said when they started to question why she was still here. “Maybe Stiles needed a break? Maybe he’s recuperating?” 

 

“In limbo?” Cora asked doubtfully. 

 

Allison shrugged, “it does give you a lot of time to think. I don’t know! It’s not like I can will myself away, right? I’m just glad it’s me here and not someone like, I don’t know, my aunt? My grandfather? Who else have you made enemies with since I was away?” 

 

Derek grit his teeth, but didn’t reply. He could wait until Stiles came back tonight to talk to him. 

 

Even if Allison’s presence was starting to make him feel uneasy, suspicious… annoyed. She was right. At least it wasn’t Theo. 

 

Allison spent the day exploring outside, with Derek and Isaac keeping a close eye on her. Allison kept trying to bring Isaac into conversation, but Isaac would barely reply. Finally, Allison twirled around and shot him a flirty smile. Derek hated seeing that smile on Stiles face, directed at someone else. 

 

“Come on, Isaac. You and I were dating the last time I was around. Why won’t you talk to me?” 

 

Isaac raised an unimpressed brow, “that was a long time ago, Allison. I’m engaged now.” 

 

Allison’s eyes widened, “oh! I didn’t know.” 

 

Lie. Derek narrowed his eyes, had they mentioned that before? From the way Isaac shifted beside him, he caught that too. 

 

“Yeah, to Lisa. The beautiful wolf with the braids.” Even while feeling uncomfortable, Isaac got stars in his eyes talking about Lisa. Derek nudged his shoulder with a grin. 

 

“She seems nice,” Allison said, still smiling at them. “I’m happy for you.” 

 

“Thanks.” 

 

Allison beamed, before turning around and continuing her walk. “Derek, are you seeing anyone?” 

 

Derek grunted, he didn’t want to talk about this with her. 

 

“Stiles, right? I heard someone mention it.” 

 

Another lie. Allison used to be a hunter, surely she knew they could catch her in her lies? But when he opened his mouth, Isaac caught his wrist with a shake of his head. 

 

Something was wrong. 

 

\-- 

 

Allison was in the kitchen with Lisa and Nana when Isaac dragged the rest of them outside. Allison wouldn’t be able to hear them here, but Lisa would. And they could hear her if something happened.  

 

“Something’s wrong,” Derek said, “she shouldn’t still be here.” 

 

“Yeah, and she knows stuff about us. Things we haven’t told her.” Isaac said. 

 

“Yeah, I don’t like her,” Cora crossed her arms over her swollen belly. Her due date was now only a week away, and if Derek didn’t have so much else to think about he would be worried about her. 

 

“Should we talk to her?” Marco asked. “Maybe she talked to Stiles when they were both in limbo, and that’s how she learned these things.” 

 

“Wait,” Isaac’s eyes widened, “they did talk in limbo. Stiles told me about it he said… “ Isaac glanced behind him, “he said Allison blamed him for her death. That’s the last time they talked.” 

 

“Well, that’s not a good sign,” Andy said. 

 

“It wasn’t Stiles, it was the Nogitsune,” Derek growled. “Allison should know that.” 

 

Isaac shook his head, “we know that place messes with your head. Maybe she’s been there too long, unable to move on. I don’t know, but I think Derek’s right. Something’s wrong.”

 

“But what should we do?” Andy asked. 

 

“We’ll talk to her,” Marco said. “Before anything else, we need to make sure she’s not another victim in this.” 

 

“Fine, and when that doesn’t work,” Cora said, “we bring in reinforcements. Who knew Allison best?” 

 

“Her dad,” Isaac said immediately. 

 

“Lydia was her best friend.” Derek said, “Stiles has her number on his phone.” 

 

“Yeah, and…” Isaac glanced at Derek nervously. 

 

“No.” Derek growled. 

 

“What?” Marco asked. 

 

“I dated her for a while, but… Scott was the one who knew her best.” Isaac said, “I know we don’t like him right now, but he might be able to-” 

 

“Scott will choose Allison over Stiles,” Derek growled. “He always does.”

 

Isaac sighed, “even now? Scott’s been trying to be friends with Stiles again, do you really think he would throw all that away? Again?”

 

“Let’s say I don’t have a lot of faith in the man.” Derek said, crossing his arms.

 

Cora shook her head, “I agree with Derek, we can’t trust Scott.” 

 

“Cora-” Isaac said, but Marco held up a hand. 

 

“I believe Derek and Cora are right. Scott is an ally, but we need to be careful. We’ll tell Scott if we need to, but not right now.” 

 

“Right,” Cora nodded. “Moving on then. I say we call everyone up, have them come talk to her. If she  _ is _ the person whose been fighting for control this whole time, we need her to face the facts. Her life is over, Stiles is still here.” 

 

Derek frowned, “what if Lydia and Chris agree with her, that Allison should be here more than Stiles?” 

 

Cora shrugged, “I don’t know, then we kick them out?”

 

“Solid plan,” Andy said wryly.

 

“But the only one we have,” Marco said. “We’ll talk to her tonight, and call for reinforcements if it doesn’t go well after.” 

 

“Maybe Nana can make more of those teas? Force Allison out?” Isaac asked. 

 

Marco nodded, “I’ll talk to her later. Hopefully, Dr. Patel will get here soon with that necromancer.” 

 

Derek huffed, “it’s too late for that. We need to get Allison out of here, now.” 

 

Before Stiles got lost in limbo for good. 

 

\-- 

 

They waited until after dinner to question her. Allison seemed unaware that something was going on. She kept talking cheerfully to anyone who would listen. She ate all their food with happy moans and small smiles. 

 

Derek hated it. He wanted Stiles to be the one here, smiling and moaning beside him. He missed his mate. 

 

After dinner was done, and the dishes were put away, Cora took Izzy and Charlie upstairs while the rest of them surrounded Allison in the living room. 

 

Derek could give her some credit, she didn’t look surprised by this at all. She crossed her arms and smiled at them easily, leaning against the brick fireplace behind her. 

 

Marco stepped forward to start, “Allison. We understand that you have been in limbo for quite some time. We know from Stiles that it is not the most pleasant place to be. It is understandable to want to… find another way out. Are you doing this on purpose? Keeping Stiles out?” 

 

Allison watched him with a blank face. Stiles interrogation face. “Yes.” She said simply. 

 

Derek felt a ball of anger burning inside of him. “Then get out of him! This isn’t your body to take!” He snarled. 

 

She turned to him, face still calm and collected. “No,” she said with a small shrug. “Why shouldn’t this body belong to me? Stiles is the one who messed up. First he got himself possessed, killing  _ me _ in the process, and then he turned to drugs?  _ Prostitution _ ? It’s pathetic. I can do so much more than he ever has. I deserve it.” 

 

Derek lunged for her, but Lisa held him back. “It’s still Stiles body,” she said. 

 

Allison grinned, “can’t do anything about this, not without hurting your boy. You can lock me down in the basement like you do with Kate, but that’s all. And I’m not Kate. I’m stronger, than any of them. Even Stiles. I’m not going anywhere.” 

 

Derek snarled at her. Allison turned her head up, smug, but her smile slid from her face when Andy grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her down, handcuffing her to the fireplace grate. 

 

“This is futile,” Allison said, tugging at her wrist. “I can get out of this.” 

 

“You have nothing to use to get out, and we aren’t leaving you here alone to try,” Marco said calmly. “We are asking you nicely, Allison, one last time. Please leave this body and return to where you belong. Your time on Earth was short, and I am sorry for that, but it was your time. You need to move on, accept your fate in death. This is not Stiles time yet.” 

 

Allison laughed at him. “Stiles is  _ weak _ . He’s the one who is going to have to accept his fate. I’m not going anywhere.”

 

“Very well,” Marco turned his back on her, addressing the rest of the pack. “Call in reinforcements. We’ll begin in the morning.” 

 

The rest of them nodded, all of them moving outside to make calls. Marco took a seat on the couch, taking first watch. 

 

None of them answered Allisons questions of what reinforcement meant. 

 

Isaac called Chris, since he was the only one who had his number. Lisa called John, who said he would be there by morning. Nana called Dr. Patel, who didn’t answer. 

 

Derek left the house to go to their cottage, where Stiles phone was sitting to charge on Stiles bedside table. He had to guess a few times at the passcode, and rolled his eyes when he realized it was the year Derek was born. 

 

Stiles was a sap when he wanted to be. 

 

On the home screen, Derek saw Stiles had a few missed messages and calls. He wasn’t surprised to see his dad had tried to call him a few times, the two of them were close. Kira had also sent him a text asking for an update soon. 

 

What surprised him was Scott had left a text as well, and two of the missed calls were from him. Scrolling through the phone, Derek saw Stiles had been ignoring Scott’s calls ever since they went to Beacon Hills…

 

The thought that Stiles was finally taking Derek’s advice and had been ignoring the other wolf did not bring Derek any joy. If anything, it made him sad that his mate had lost trust in his old best friend. 

 

Derek shook the thought out of his head, and went in search for Lydia’s number. Scott and Stiles relationship wasn’t important right now. 

 

Lydia didn’t answer her phone, but he left a message. He would try her again in the morning. 

 

All they could do now was sit and wait. And hope that Stiles didn’t give up. 

 

\-- 

 

Stiles didn’t know how long he’d been here. 

 

At first he waited, like he always did, until he returned back to his body. But that never happened. He’s been floating here, in this blank nothingness for… who knows how long. 

 

He was starting to get sick of his own thoughts. 

 

“Stiles,” a voice called to him. He turned to see Talia, who always stood proud and strong. Stiles nodded at her. “Are you alright?” 

 

“Yeah,” he said, his voice sounded fake to his own ears. “You know, just floatin’.” 

 

“You’ve been here a long time.”

 

“Yeah, hours.” 

 

“Days,” Talia corrected, her brow furrowed in concern the same way Derek’s did. Stiles felt like he should be shocked by this news, but he wasn’t. 

 

He just kept floating. “Oh.” 

 

“You need to find your way back.” She said. It looked like she was trying to get closer to him, but she wasn’t getting any closer. Maybe Stiles was keeping her at bay. 

 

If he was, he didn’t know how he was doing it. 

 

“I can’t. I can’t control it.” 

 

“You can, you just don’t know how.” 

 

“Yeah,” Cause, duh, that’s what he’d just said. “I can’t control it.” 

 

Talia looked frustrated. She clenched her hands into fists, like Derek did when he was frustrated. 

 

He missed Derek. 

 

“You are  _ tethered _ , Stiles, tethered to the living world. You  _ can _ draw yourself back. You just might not be tethered in the way you think you are.” 

 

Well, that was cryptic. Stiles suddenly remembered Talia’s emissary had been Deaton. That made a whole lot more sense now. 

 

Talia was gone before she could explain the whole tethering thing. 

 

Stiles kept floating. 

 

\-- 

 

John arrived at dawn. 

 

Lisa was technically on watch, but Derek wasn’t leaving this room unless he had to. Allison sat on a cushion on the floor, looking bored with it all. 

 

Derek hated her with every fiber of his being. 

 

The pounding on the door woke him from the doze he had managed to sink into. He and Lisa both knew who it was, but Allison looked nervous when he left to collect them.

 

John didn’t say anything to him when he opened the door. He pushed his way in, and barreled right into the living room. He only stopped when he was standing in front of Allison, an accusatory finger pointed at her. 

 

“Get out of him,” the sheriff snarled, “get out of him  _ right now _ .” 

 

Allison yawned, “why? You barely talk to him now, what difference does this make to you?” 

 

“We talk every Sunday afternoon, at the  _ least _ , and we visit once a month. Don’t act like you know my relationship with my son. Get out of him!” 

 

Allison cocked a brow at him. Lisa and Derek watched uneasily from behind the sheriff. 

 

“Stiles abandoned you to take a road trip across the country. He left you, alone, when you needed him most to discover the wonderful world of drugs. And now you want him back? I’m sorry that you lost your son here, Sheriff Stilinski, I really am. But I’m not the one you should be mad at, Stiles is.” 

 

“My son is a brave, strong,  _ survivor _ .” John said, glaring down at the girl. “He had every reason to leave Beacon Hills when he did, and he came back for me when he found out I was still alive. Don’t think you can manipulate this into what it’s not. Stiles has done nothing wrong in my eyes.” 

 

Allison sat up straighter, “he abandoned you-” 

 

“To save himself.” 

 

“He abandoned his pack,” Allison spat out, “he abandoned his best friend!” 

 

“His ‘best friend’ accused him of murder. His ‘best friend’ sided with Stiles  _ rapist _ .” Allison flinched at the word. “I haven’t forgiven Scott for that, I don’t expect Stiles to either.” 

 

They stared at each other, both sets of eyes fierce. 

 

“He spent an entire year on drugs.” Allison finally said, “you can’t tell me that you’re proud of that.” 

 

“I’ve spent a lot of time at the bottom of a bottle myself. I’m proud of my kid for getting himself out of it, for accepting help.” John squatted down, until he was eye level with her. “If you can hear me Stiles, I am  _ proud  _ of you, kid. I love you. Don’t let her convince you otherwise.” 

 

Allison glared at him, “he can’t hear you. Stiles is already gone.” 

 

“Lie,” Derek said, feeling a smile tug on his lips. Hope flickering in his chest for the first time. “Stiles is still there.” 

 

“He’s not,” Allison said. “He’s given up.” 

 

“We can hear when you lie, Allison,” Lisa said. “We know he’s still there.” 

 

John smiled, “Stilinski men have always been stubborn. You can’t get rid of him that easily.” 

 

“I’m not going anywhere.” Allison said. 

 

“That’s fine,” John stood up again, made his way to the couch. “We can wait you out until Stiles comes back.” 

 

Allison glared at them, but she didn’t have a retort. 

 

Derek felt the hope that had started to spark in his chest swell. They had a chance here after all. 

 

\--- 

 

There was another knock on the door an hour after John arrived. Derek assumed it was Melissa, since Chris was still on a plan from France, Lydia had yet to answer her phone, and John had mentioned Melissa was coming right after her shift ended. 

 

It wasn’t Melissa though. It was a small asian man with blue hair, dressed in all black. He looked like he was in his mid-thirties. 

 

Derek had no idea what he was doing here. 

 

“Who the hell are you?” Isaac asked from behind him. Derek reached back to shove him away. 

 

“Can we help you?” Derek grit out. The sooner they dealt with this, the sooner he could get back to Stiles. 

 

“Priya Patel said you needed my help?” 

 

Derek’s eyes widened, he grabbed Isaac and pulled him through the door, closing it behind them. He didn’t need Allison knowing the necromancer was here. 

 

“You’re the necromancer?” Derek asked. 

 

The man nodded, “yes.” 

 

“You’re so young!” Isaac said. 

 

The man chuckled, “I’m much older than I appear.” 

 

“Great. We do need your help,” Derek turned to Isaac. “Take him to Nana, she can explain everything to him.” 

 

“Can I see the boy?” the man asked. 

 

Derek shook his head, “he’s um… not really here, right now.” 

 

“He’s possessed.” 

 

“Yeah.” 

 

The man nodded, “Priya went to gather some ingredients for me. I’m assuming this Nana is the witch?” 

 

“Yeah, she has a lot of things already in her cottage,” Derek said, pushing Isaac towards the man. 

 

“Good, take me to her.” The man was already turning around, and Isaac had to hurry to lead him in the right direction. 

 

Derek sighed in relief. He hoped this man knew what he was doing. 

 

\-- 

 

When Stiles closed his eyes, white was still all he could see. He was starting to think he was going to go blind here, with all this white. 

 

Like snow blindness. 

 

But he was tired. So, so, tired. He just wanted to be able to close his fucking eyes and rest. 

 

“Stiles.” A voice whispered. 

 

Stiles turned, “Mom?” 

 

He hadn’t been expecting this. His mom had only come by once, he had thought she hadn’t wanted to see him again… 

 

Unless she was here to lead him away. That would be nice. 

Maybe he could finally get some rest. 

 

“Stiles,” his mother said, her sun dress flowing around her, “how are you?” 

 

“I’m tired,” Stiles felt his eyes droop, “I’m so tired, Mom.” 

 

“I know, sweetheart.” his mom smiled gently at him. “You need to get out of here.” 

 

“I can’t. I’m stuck.” 

 

“You’ve gotten yourself stuck.” His mom said, she was suddenly in front of him, running a hand through his hair. Stiles leaned into it. “You can get yourself unstuck, too.” 

 

Stiles shook his head, “it wasn’t me. It’s whoever is in my body. They’re stronger than I am, they’ve got me trapped here.” 

 

“They’re not,” his mom put his hand on his chest. “You feel like they are because you’re dragging yourself down with self doubt, but you’re strong, Stiles. Everyone is cheering for you.” 

 

Stiles felt tears spring to his eyes, “they’re not, I’ve let them all down. I’m disappointing everyone, mom, they all must be so mad at me. They’re never going to forgive me for this.” Stiles felt tears fall down his face. “Derek’s never going to forgive me for leaving him like this.” 

 

“My dear, oh my  _ kochanie _ ,” his mom pulled him into a hug, Stiles fell into it greedily, “no one is expecting an apology. There is nothing to forgive. All they want is for you to go back to them.” His mom rubbed his back for a minute, making shushing noises. “Perhaps  _ kochanie _ , it’s not your pack that you need to forgive you. You need forgiveness from yourself.” 

 

Stiles sniffed, “for what?” 

 

His mom leaned back, brushing his bangs back with her fingers. “I don’t know, but you have time here to think about it.” 

 

She leaned forward to kiss his forehead, then she was gone. 

 

Stiles floated in the nothingness, and he started to think. 

 

\-- 

 

Melissa was the next to arrive. Scott walked through the door with her. 

 

Derek wasted no time throwing him right back out again. Scott fell onto their front lawn, his back hitting the ground hard. John pulled Melissa inside. 

 

“Leave.” Derek growled. 

 

Scott got back to his feet, his hands held out in front of him placatingly. “Derek, I’m here to help.” 

“Because you’ve been so helpful to Stiles in the past,” Derek sneered. “If you think I’m letting you get close to Allison, to give you a chance to betray Stiles  _ again _ , you’re out of your mind. Get off my property.” 

 

Scott didn’t move. “I know I’ve let Stiles down, I know, but I’m here to help. I want the same as you, I want Stiles back.” 

 

Derek scoffed, “you chose Allison over Stiles, you chose  _ Theo  _ over Stiles, and now you expect me to believe you? No.” 

 

Scott closed his eyes, his expression pained. “I’m not proud of the way I’ve treated Stiles, Derek. I’m fully aware of my mistakes. But I-” Scott opened his eyes, and to Derek’s surprise they were full of tears. “He’s still my brother. I’m trying to make up for what I did, but I need a chance. Please? Can you just- I only want to help.” 

 

Derek narrowed his eyes. The two of them were still having a stand off when Isaac came up behind him, clapping a hand onto Derek’s shoulder. “He does know Allison best, Derek. Maybe he’ll be able to get through to her.” 

 

Scott’s eyes jumped between Derek and Isaac, “please, Derek? I’ll only try to help, I swear. And if you, like, don’t like what I’m doing, you can kick me out.” 

 

Derek didn’t like it, but Isaac had a point. Scott was looking convincing… and Derek was getting desperate. 

 

“Fine.” He finally said. Scott’s face suddenly switched into a goofy smile. Derek wanted to punch him. “But if you do anything that makes Allison think she deserves to be here-” 

 

“You’ll bite me to death, or whatever, got it, yes.” Scott nodded. 

 

Derek sighed. He was already regretting this. 

 

\--

 

As soon as they entered the living room, Scott ran to Allison. The two of them hugged each other tight, Scott kneeling beside her on the floor. John and Melissa sat on the couch together, watching this with no surprise. Isaac made an annoyed noise behind him. 

 

Derek looked at the pair hugging on the floor, feeling anger start to burn in his belly. He should have known Scott would do this. He had always chosen Allison over Stiles. 

 

He didn’t know why he thought they could trust him with this. 

 

“Scott,” Allison said into Scott’s shoulder, her arm around his neck. “I missed you.” 

 

“I missed you too.” Scott said. “I’m sorry, Allison. I’m sorry I couldn’t save you.” 

 

“It wasn’t your fault.” Allison whispered. 

 

Scott nodded, and then pulled back. They both had tears in their eyes. “It wasn’t Stiles fault either.” 

 

Derek looked at the boy in surprise. Huh. 

 

“Scott… Stiles, he was weak. His weakness got me killed.” 

 

“No, Allison,” Scott wiped the tears off his face and leaned further back, putting space between the two of them. “All three of us made the choice to get into that ice bath. It could have been any of us that got possessed.” 

 

“But it wasn’t,” Allison hissed, “it was Stiles. And his weakness got me killed!” 

 

“The Nogitsune killed you, not Stiles,” Scott said firmly. “Stiles tried to fight it. Stiles told me himself that he would rather die than have it kill anyone else.” Derek and John both made hurt noises at that, they hadn’t known. Derek should have though. That was who Stiles was. “Stiles isn’t to blame. I’m sorry, but you’re taking an innocent person's life to bring yourself back and… you can’t. You can’t do that.” 

 

“Innocent?” Allison laughed, “are you serious right now? Fine, don’t believe he killed me, but he’s still killed. He killed Donovan, he killed Theo.” 

 

Scott frowned, “in self defence.” 

 

“You really believe that?” 

 

“I do.” 

 

Derek let out a breath. 

 

“Scott, they’re manipulating you.” Allison said.

 

“No, Theo manipulated me,” Scott turned to give Derek a hesitant smile. “It took me a while to realize, but it’s true. Stiles hasn’t done anything wrong.” 

 

“You’re not the man I thought you were.” Allison said. 

 

Derek turned away from Scott to glare down at her. “Or maybe you’re the one whose changed. Limbo messes with your head, Allison, we’ve been trying to tell you this. You need to let go. Move on.” 

 

“I’m not going anywhere.” 

 

Derek squatted down in front of her, “then what’s your plan? To stay in Stiles body forever? Both of your ex boyfriends have told you to leave. Your father is going to arrive to tell you the same thing. You’re not going to have anyone on your side. Is that how you want to live the rest of another person’s life? Alone?” 

 

“My father would never turn against me,” Allison snapped, “you may have gotten to Isaac and Scott, but my father is the smarter person I know. You can’t manipulate him.” 

 

“Smarter than me?” Everyone turned in surprise to find a woman standing in the doorway of the living room. She was wearing a hoodie over leggings, and had a giant backpack that she dropped onto the floor beside her. Her red, chin-length hair was pushed behind her ear, revealing a large scar that went from behind her ear, down her neck, and into the folds of her sweatshirt. 

 

Derek had no idea what this woman as doing here. 

 

“Lydia,” Scott said beside him. Derek, Isaac and Allison all opened their mouths in shock. 

 

This was not the Lydia they had known. She stepped into the room wearing sensible running shoes, not three inch heels. 

 

Sometimes, things really did change. 

 

“Scott,” Lydia said, looking him over before she turned her eyes on the rest of them. “Isaac. Derek, I got your message. Your heavily pregnant sister let me in.” 

 

Derek grunted. He didn’t know what to say to this woman, who looked fiercer now at her normal height of 5‘3 than she ever had in pumps. Luckily she turned those eyes onto Allison before Derek had to say anything. 

 

“Ally, what are you doing?” 

 

“I could say the same to you,” Allison scoffed. “When did you start wearing leggings as pants?” 

 

Lydia raised a brow. It wasn’t as thin as it used to be, but it was no less menacing. “When I decided to get my PhD in mathematics, while also working on a bachelor of environmental science, and dabbling in biochemistry. The world is dying, someone needs to save it. I can’t waste my time on makeup when I could be getting the extra 20 minutes of sleep. It’s simple math. Now enough about my looks, this isn’t high school anymore. Get the fuck out of Stiles.” 

 

Allison raised Stiles head, defiant. “No.” 

 

They stared at each other, calculating, before Lydia reached into her pocket and pulled out a switchblade. “Fine.” She flicked the knife open. “We’ll do this the hard way then.”

 

“Woah, okay,” Scott said, grabbing onto her shoulder. Derek already had an arm around her waist, pulling her back. 

 

“It’s still Stiles body,” Derek growled.  

 

“I know that, but talking isn’t going to work.” Lydia said. She wasn’t struggling to get out of their hold though. “The knife is charmed, it mostly attacks the mind while leaving small marks on the body. Allison will hurt more than Stiles will.” 

 

“That’s… not very reassuring,” Isaac said behind them. 

 

Lydia huffed, “well, do you have a better idea?”

 

Derek dragged both Lydia and Scott outside. Allison watched them go with amusement. She obviously thought they didn’t have a plan at all. 

 

Derek made sure the door was shut behind them before he spoke. 

 

“I’ll take you to Nana’s cottage. That’s where we have a witch and a necromancer working on a solution, maybe you can help.” 

 

Lydia pushed her hair behind her ear with a nod. Scott looked confused. 

 

“Necro-what?” 

 

“Necromancer. That’s the type of magic this is, the ability to communicate with the dead.” Lydia explained. “Obviously something's gone wrong.” 

 

“Stiles doesn’t know how to control it,” Derek said. “We didn’t even realize necromancy was a real form of magic until Stiles was already being possessed.” 

 

“It’s very rare,” Lydia said. 

 

Scott still looked confused, but Derek didn’t have time to explain more. He lead them both to Nana’s cottage where they found the two magic users hunched over a table, grinding ingredients together. Her flying squirrel was staring at the ingredients just as intensely. Priya stood to the side watching them. 

 

“Lydia, Scott,” Derek pointed at each, “this is Nana Lucinda, Dr. Priya Patel and...” 

 

“Riku,” the man said, not looking up. 

 

“Riku. We’re all here to help Stiles. Lydia might be able to help with… whatever you’re working on.” 

 

“Good,” Nana said, “grab some wormwood for us,” Nana pointed vaguely behind her. Lydia made her way over to the shelves, like she knew exactly where she was going. 

 

Derek didn’t have time to be impressed. 

 

“I’m heading back over,” he said to Scott. 

 

“I’ll stay here… help them if I can. I don’t think I can say any more to Allison.” 

 

Derek nodded, but he put a hand on Scott’s shoulder and gave it a squeeze before he left. Scott shot him a hopeful smile. 

 

\-- 

 

Stiles floated. Both in the nothingness and his thoughts. 

 

His mom said he needed to forgive himself before he found his way back, and he was starting to think that… maybe she was right. 

 

When he thought about it, he had a lot of pain inside. Most of it from him. 

 

And it had started long before the Nogitsune came into the picture. 

 

It started when his mom got sick.

 

Stiles had spent so long blaming himself for her sickness that… he had forgotten he was even doing it. He used to spend hours, agonizing over what he could have done better. How he could have acted better, been easier for her. How his ADHD, his chaotic energy, had been the reason she had gotten sick in the first place. 

 

Then he had done the same thing with his dad. When he had spent night after night, drunk at the kitchen table, Stiles had blamed himself. He’d watched his dad drink, and think of all the things he should have done differently. All the things that would have made him stop, if he had just been a better son. 

 

By the time the Nogitsune, and Theo, and all the shit had happened…. Stiles had already been a bundle of self-loathing. 

 

His mother was right. It was time to let that go. 

 

Stiles hadn’t killed his mom. Frontotemporal dementia had. And it had sucked, but he couldn’t have done anything about it. 

 

Stiles wasn’t the reason his dad drank. His dad drank because he was grieving his wife. His dad drank because his own father had been a drunk, and it was the only coping mechanism he knew. Stiles didn’t have anything to do with that. 

 

The Nogitsune chose him at random. It could have been Scott or Allison, but it wasn’t. It was him. And he didn’t have a choice in that. He didn’t have a say, and that wasn’t his fault. 

 

Same with Theo. And Donovan. And all those people who had used him on the streets. They abused him and used him, and left him with nothing. But that wasn’t his fault. He could let it all go. 

 

So he did. 

 

Stiles felt lighter than he had in years. Lighter than he had felt, even after he stopped going to therapy every day. 

 

He felt whole. More whole than he’d felt since he was seven years old, and his mom had been diagnosed with a terminal disease. 

 

And with this wholeness, came a sturdiness in his chest. 

 

He didn’t feel like he was floating aimlessly anymore. 

 

\-- 

 

By the time Chris arrived, the pack was starting to feel antsy. Derek had to lock Charlie away in their cottage, he had been barking so much at Allison. While he had sympathized with the dog, it was getting on everyone else’s nerves. 

 

“I know, Charlie,” Derek said to the little dog, giving in a few pats before he left him again. “I miss him too.” 

 

Charlie whined when Derek closed the door behind him, but Derek closed his eyes and walked away. He would deal with the dog later. For now, he had food, water and his bed. Derek just needed to get him Stiles back. 

 

When he walked back into the living room of the big house, Chris and Allison were still curled up on the floor together. The pack was sitting around the various chairs, a lot of them playing on their phones while they waited. 

 

Derek crossed his arms and turned back to the pair on the floor. He listened as Chris said he only wanted what was best for Allison. He wanted her to be happy with her mother. Derek could tell Allison wasn’t too happy to hear that. Her eyes narrowed, and her fingers dug into Chris’s shirt. 

 

He knew what these tells meant, because he knew Stiles. And Allison was still fucking inside of Stiles' body, and not even her father's kind words were convincing her to get out. 

 

Nana and Riku hadn’t updated them in twelve hours. 

 

Derek turned around and walked right back out of the house again. He couldn’t keep looking at Stiles' body, Stiles' expressions, knowing that Allison was behind those eyes. 

 

He couldn’t keep doing this. 

 

“Hey,” Cora called out behind him, grabbing onto his shoulder when Derek stopped a few feet from the front door. “You okay?” 

 

Derek glared at the ground, “no.” 

 

Cora huffed out a laugh, “right. This is the home stretch though. We’ll get him back soon.” 

 

Derek turned his somber eyes to her, “you don’t know that. Allison might be right, she might be stronger than Stiles. She’s been here for days, Cora, and you didn’t see Stiles the morning she came. He was… he was exhausted. And I started a fight with him anyway.” Derek shook his head. “I don’t know why he would fight to get back to me.” 

 

“Don’t talk like that,” Cora squeezed his shoulder, “you’ve been his strongest supporter this whole time, don’t give up on him now.” 

 

“I’m not,” Derek looked back at the ground. “But listening to Chris in there… maybe I’m supporting the wrong thing. Maybe Stiles wants to move on. He’s been through so much, maybe I should be supporting his decision to stop fighting. To let go.” 

 

“That’s bullshit.” Cora said, and then suddenly she was squeezing Derek’s shoulder hard, her claws poking his skin. 

 

“Okay, I get it,” Derek tried to move away, but she held on. Derek frowned in concern when he noticed her eyes flicker beta gold. “Are you okay?” 

 

“Yeah,” Cora let go of him, but it looked like it was a challenge. “Yeah, sorry, didn’t meant to squeeze so tight.” 

 

Derek frowned, “Cora-” 

 

“Derek!” Lisa shouted from inside. 

 

Derek bolted, running inside without another thought. Allison was standing in the middle of the room when he got there, a gun in hand. 

 

“How did she get a gun?” He snarled. 

 

“I may have forgotten to remove some things before I sat down with her,” Chris said, his hands up. “I didn’t give it to her on purpose.” 

 

Derek growled, it was an amateur move. 

 

“Enough about the gun,” Allison said, turning to point it right towards John and Melissa. “I have it now. I don’t know if there’s wolfbane in these bullets, but I do know there’s something.” She cocked the gun, and John moved in front of Melissa. The rest of the pack shifted. “If none of you are going to accept that this is my body now then fine. I don’t need you to. I’m still not leaving it.” 

 

“Allison-” Chris tried to say, but stopped when Allison’s eyes turned to him. They were wild. 

There would be no reasoning with her now. 

 

“I thought that at least my own father would take my side, but no. You’ve all fallen for Stiles pathetic pity party. But that’s fine. Like I said, I don’t need you. I just need you to let me go.” 

 

“You’re not going anywhere,” Derek growled. 

 

“Yes, I am,” Allison said. She stepped forward, reaching behind the sheriff to grab Melissa. When John tried to protest, she pointed the gun directly at her head. “Let me leave, or Melissa goes down with me.” 

 

Allison manhanded Melissa in front of her, using her as a human shield. She kept the gun to her temple. Melissa took calming breaths. No one else moved. 

 

“Allison, please, this isn’t you,” Chris said. Allison ignored him. 

 

Allison started walking to the door, slow and steady steps. Derek felt his claws grow, his teeth sharpen, but he couldn’t do anything. Stiles would be devastated if anything happened to Melissa. They all would. 

 

But what were they going to do if Allison got off the property? She was trained, she knew how to disappear. 

 

Derek might not ever see Stiles again. 

 

“Allison, please,” Derek begged her. “Don’t do this.” 

 

Allison’s eyes shifted to him. She was at the entrance to the living room. 

 

“I’m sorry, Derek. You’re a good guy. I would never have believed that before, but I can see it now.” Allison smiled at him, Stiles smile. Derek ached to see it. “You’ll find someone else, don’t worry.” 

 

Derek stepped forward, but Allison pressed the gun harder into Melissa’s head. Melissa closed her eyes, and Derek froze. “He’s my mate,  _ please _ .” 

 

“You’ll get over him,” Allison said, and then her eyes moved away, back to everyone else. Like that was all that needed to be said. “I’m taking Melissa with me until I’m sure I’m not being followed.” 

 

Allison started to take the last few steps back out of the living room, Derek felt his heart shatter. If Allison left, if Allison made it to the car… Derek shook his head, his eyes clouded with tears. He needed to focus. He needed to be focused in order to track her. This couldn’t be it. 

 

This couldn’t be it. 

 

But then, Allison had one step left to go, and Nana was suddenly right behind her. She lifted her arm, and jammed something into Allison’s neck. Allison’s arms flailed, the gun went off. Someone behind him dropped but Derek didn’t have time to check who. Melissa was running out of the way, towards safety, and Derek was running into her spot. 

 

He grabbed the gun before it could land and go off again. He slipped an arm around Stiles body before Nana had to take the full weight. 

 

Allison’s eyes slipped closed and Stiles body went slack. 

 

\-- 

 

“Okay, owe!” Andy whined. He was sitting in a kitchen chair, the bullet had just pushed itself out of his shoulder. The wound closed a second later. 

 

Cora rolled her eyes, “don’t be such a baby, there wasn’t even any wolfsbane in it.” 

 

“Well excuse me, I’ve never been shot before!” Andy hissed. 

 

“You’re going to be fine,” Lisa said, wiping up the blood on his chest. “See? It’s all gone now.” 

 

Andy looked down at his chest in relief. Cora rolled her eyes again, “baby.” 

 

Derek watched all of this from his spot on the coffee table with detached interest. He was glad Andy was okay, but he was more concerned with the body sprawled out on the couch in front of him. 

 

Nana and Riku were still checking Stiles over. The flying squirrel was making small chirping noises, but Derek didn’t know what that meant. It was usually silent. 

 

It had been an exciting ten minutes. 

 

Lisa had immediately gone to Andy when he fell, helping him with the bullet wound. Cora had joined them around the kitchen table now. 

 

John and Scott were both standing on either side of Melissa, who was sitting, shaken, in the armchair beside Derek. All three of them were watching Stiles. 

 

Marco, Isaac and Lydia stood between the two groups, all of them with their arms crossed and tense. 

 

Chris had disappeared. 

 

“Is he okay?” Derek asked, his mouth was dry. He had gone from thinking he would never even see Stiles face again, to not knowing if Stiles would ever wake up. He didn’t know which was more daunting. 

 

Riku sighed. “It’s too early to tell. The potion is meant to give the person whose mind this body belongs to a step up. A chance to regain control. But it’s not a guarantee, what happens next is up to Stiles.” He turned to Derek put a hand on his knee. “But from what I can tell, even in the state he is in now, Stiles has a lot of strength in him. I am confident that he will wake up soon.” 

 

“But you’re saying there’s a chance Allison will be the one who wakes up out of this?” John asked, a hand rubbing over his forehead. “Stiles could… Stiles could still not wake up out of this.” 

 

“Stiles will be the one who wakes up,” Marco said, “I’m sure of it.” 

 

Derek nodded. Stiles had to wake up. 

 

They all sit in silence, watching Stiles motionless body. Until there’s a scratching at the door. 

 

“Is that… Charlie?” Isaac asked, moving to open the door. The dog ran in, making a beeline for the couch and landing hard on Stiles lap. 

 

Derek moved to grab him. “I locked him away, I don’t know how he got out,” he said with a frown. 

 

Nana held him back before he could grab the dog. 

 

“Wait,” she said, a knowing smile on her face. “He’s here to help.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't hate me for always leaving you on a cliff xD 
> 
> Also, I know there are a lot of mixed feelings about Scott. Personally, I don't like canon Scott. He's a dick and a bad friend. I'm trying to make him better here, sorry if that's not what you wanted to happen.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here you are my darlings! Thank you to everyone who commented and left kudos along the way, you helped me get all these chapters up in time :) :) <3 <3 
> 
> I am thinking I will add a few smaller fics/one shots into this universe eventually, but this is it for the big fics. The story has been told :) I hope you all enjoyed it. 
> 
>  
> 
> Warnings: Stiles and Allison have a stand off in limbo at the beginning of this chapter.  
> There is a sex scene at the end of the chapter. It is safe, sane and consensual :)

Stiles sat cross legged in the white space. It didn’t feel like floating anymore. It didn’t feel solid, but he felt like he was sitting at least. 

 

It made him feel safer, whatever it was. 

 

He was trying to think about what Talia said. How he was tethered, but not in the way he might think. He wasn’t entirely sure what tethered meant. It wasn’t an anchor, or she would have said anchor, so obviously it was a specific thing. It wasn’t the idea of love. Or the feeling of wind on his face. It wasn’t the abstract idea of family or pack. It was something in particular, or  _ someone  _ in particular. He couldn’t figure it out though. 

 

It wasn’t the pack, or his dad. It wasn’t his mom, or she would tether him to the afterlife. 

 

And it wasn’t Derek. Much to his disappointment. 

 

He kept trying. He kept thinking of the way Derek made him feel. Of how Derek held him after a nightmare, or how he whispered in his ear during sex. But… nothing. Memories did nothing, thoughts did nothing, emotions did nothing. Anything related to Derek: nothing. 

 

He didn’t understand it. 

 

Derek had been there. Derek had been the only person who stuck by him, who stayed with him even when Stiles had been self-destructing and hard headed. He’d waited Stiles out until he asked for help, and if it wasn’t for him and Lisa- 

 

Stiles blinked his eyes open. A burst of laughter fell out of his mouth. 

 

Derek hadn’t been the first one there for him. 

 

Like the thought had summoned him, Stiles heard Charlie’s excited pants rushing towards him. He turned around, his arms open, and caught the dog jumping to his chest. 

 

Charlie licked his chin with enthusiasm, and Stiles laughed. Of course it was Charlie. He and Charlie had been through everything, since Stiles first days in New York. Of course Charlie would still be here for him now. Tethering him to the world. 

 

As he hugged the dog to his chest, Stiles felt something settle inside him, something securing him to Charlie, and out. 

 

He knew his way back out now. 

 

“Sir Charles, you are full of surprises,” Stiles whispered into the dogs fur. Charlie wiggled happily. 

 

Stiles knew, in that moment, that if he wanted to leave he could. He could walk right out of here and never come back, if Charlie was at his side. 

 

But he also knew that he had to wait. Just a bit longer. 

 

\-- 

 

He didn’t have to wait long before Allison showed up. Her face was set in a scowl, and her cheeks were tear streaked. 

 

Stiles thought he should probably feel betrayed, or hurt at least, that someone he had once considered to be a close friend had planned to take over his life and leave him in this white space forever. He should at least be surprised that it was Allison this whole time, and not Theo or Kate. Maybe he would feel those things later, when he was alone in bed with Charlie and Derek. Maybe he was in shock right now. 

 

Whatever the reason, Stiles didn’t feel hurt or betrayed. For now, Stiles didn’t feel anything.

 

Allison, however, looked furious. “What did you do?” She snapped at him. 

 

Stiles raised his brows, “I didn’t do anything. I’ve been here, remember? Not much I can do from here.” 

 

Allison glared daggers at him. She took a step forward, but it made no difference. She couldn’t get closer to him. Stiles was holding her back. 

 

He knew he was doing it this time. 

 

“You- you’ve done something! You’ve figured out how to use your powers!” 

 

“Maybe,” Stiles shrugged, “you figured out how to manipulate them first though. Thanks for that, by the way, being stuck here for days was very helpful.” 

 

“Shut up!” Allison screamed. Her eyes were wild, her hands were clenched into fists at her sides. Stiles would be more concerned if he didn’t know she couldn’t get near him. “It’s not helpful to be here, it’s the worst! It’s horrible! It-it-” 

 

Allison covered her face with her hands, her whole body shaking. Stiles sighed. 

 

“I’m sorry,” Stiles said, bending over to but Charlie down beside him. The dog sat patiently, leaning against Stiles leg. 

 

“You’re sorry?” Allison asked, glaring at him over her cupped hands. 

 

“Yeah,” Stiles said with a shrug, “I didn’t think of you at all when I tried to make this stop. I lied to you, and then ditched you. That was a shitty thing to do, I’m sorry.”

 

Allison’s eyes narrowed. “Stiles… you can’t be sorry.” 

 

Stiles took a step forward, and just like that they were only a foot apart. He reached over and grabbed her hand, giving it a squeeze. The contact sent a jolt through his body, and Allison stood up straighter too. She let out a breath, and her shoulders softened. Something shifted between them. When Stiles looked into her eyes now, they looked less crazed, and more sad. 

 

“I am sorry. I should have told you what I thought from the beginning. I should have explained why I couldn’t help you from the get go, instead of avoiding it whenever I saw you. I could have, you know, actually done the things I told you about and tried to find another way to get you back. Talked to your dad. Helped you, instead of only thinking of myself.” 

 

Allison stared at him, then she sniffed and squeezed his hand back. “You don’t have to apologize, Stiles. I hate it here as much as you do. For fuck’s sake, I just tried to take over your body so I could get out of here!” Allison shook her head. “You don’t need to be sorry for anything, I’m sorry.” 

 

“If I don’t have you be sorry, neither do you,” Stiles said, smiling at her. “This is a scary, fucked up place, we got trapped in. It messes with your head.” 

 

Allison’s lips wobbled, “it does. They- your pack- they said that, but I didn’t listen to them. I was so sure that what I was doing was the right thing, until- until right now when you touched my hand and then suddenly everything was so clear again and-” Allison put a hand to her forehead. “Oh my god Stiles, what did I do? What did I- I really thought that… Stiles, I almost killed you!” 

 

Allison was full on crying now, so Stiles pulled her into a hug. They held each other for a long time, until Allison pulled back and wiped her eyes with her sleeve. 

 

“Well, you can go back to your body now. I’ll… stay here.” She gave him a watery smile. “It’s what I deserve, for what I did to you.” 

 

“Or, you could go see your mom.” Stiles said, looking over Allison’s shoulder. 

 

“You know I can’t, I’m stuck here.” 

 

“Not as stuck as you think. Look,” Stiles pointed, and Allison turned around. Her breath caught when she saw her mother standing behind them. 

 

“But… maybe she’s just here to visit me.” 

 

“I don’t think that’s what this is, I can feel it. You’ve let go, Ally, you’re free. Go see your mom. Get out of this place.” 

 

Allison looked at him one last time, gripped his hand tight, “I guess I’ll… see you later?” 

 

Stiles snorted, “yeah. Try to stay out of other people’s body’s, in the meantime.” 

 

Allison winced, “sorry again,” she whispered, before she let him go and walked towards her mom. When she reached her they both disappeared. Stiles felt a calm spread through him as he watched. 

 

Allison was finally at peace. 

 

Charlie’s tail wacked against Stiles leg, he smiled down at the dog. “You know, Charlie, I think I’m finally starting to get the hang of this.” 

 

Charlie kept staring up at him, wagging his tail. Stiles turned, following the tug in his chest. He hesitated though, before he followed it out.  

 

“You know what Chuck?” Stiles turned back around. “There’s one last thing I have to do before we go. Hey, dickface!” 

 

Theo appeared in front of him. Instead of his usual smug expression, he looked confused. Stiles was glad this was the last expression he would ever see on the bastards face.  

 

“You’re a horrible human being, and the world is a hell of a lot better without you.” Stiles grinned, and he hoped it was smug. He finally felt like he had the upper hand over Theo. “You’re going to spend the rest of eternity alone, in this white nothingness. Nothing but your own thoughts and the knowledge that your entire life was meaningless. Enjoy!” 

 

Stiles snapped his fingers, and Theo was gone before he could even open his mouth to reply. Stiles knew that it had worked, though he didn’t know how he knew it. Theo would never hurt anyone ever again. 

 

“Alright Charlie, let’s get out of here.”

 

He turned around again, and left the whiteness behind. 

 

\-- 

 

Derek sat beside the couch and watched Stiles and Charlie sleep. He was aware of the rest of the pack moving around, getting food, water, rest. He was aware someone had placed a plate beside him at some point, but he ignored it all.

 

His whole focus was the boy on the couch. 

 

It had been hours, and Stiles and Charlie hadn’t moved at all. Riku kept placing a hand on Stiles head and nodding, but Derek didn’t know what that meant. Riku never explained either. 

 

John and Melissa had fallen asleep in the armchair. Scott has thrown a blanket over them, before taking a seat in the other chair across the living room. Derek didn’t know if he’d stayed awake, he didn’t turn to check. 

 

He could hear the pack whispering outside. He could hear Nana, Riku and Lydia talking in the kitchen. Chris had left at some point, Derek didn’t care where he’d gone. 

 

His eyes stayed on Stiles. Only Stiles. 

 

—

 

Stiles' eyes started to flutter, and Derek leapt to his feet. He hunched over his mate, stroked fingers down his cheek. 

 

“Stiles?” Derek whispered. 

 

Stiles moved into Derek’s touch, a smile broke across Derek’s face. 

 

“He’s waking up!” Derek heard Scott yell behind them. There was a clatter, and suddenly everyone was moving towards them, crowding around. Derek didn’t sit back though, he didn’t want Stiles to feel overwhelmed when he woke up. 

 

Derek would be all he could see. 

 

Stiles' eyes fluttered again, and then started to blink open. Charlie wiggled around on Stiles lap, rolling himself to wakefulness. 

 

Derek smiled down at his boys. They were waking up, they were waking up and everything was going to be okay. 

 

Stiles' eyes finally opened a moment later, wincing at the light. Derek cupped his face with a hand. 

 

“Stiles.” 

 

Stiles frowned at him, and Derek pulled back. Fear gripped his heart when Stiles did nothing but stare at him in confusion, before turning and giving everyone around them a look of bewilderment. 

 

“Stiles?” 

 

“What?” Stiles voice was scratchy, but the message was loud and clear. 

 

This wasn’t Stiles.

 

Derek tensed. He made to move off the couch, but a hand on his shoulder stopped him. 

 

“Stiles, my dear, how are you feeling?” Nana asked. Derek closed his eyes. She didn’t see it, none of them knew this hadn’t worked, that Stiles was-

 

“Is Charlie my fucking  _ familiar _ ?!” 

 

Derek’s eyes snapped open. Stiles was sitting up now, looking down at Charlie in his lap. Charlie was lying on his back, his tail wagging happily as he got belly rubs. 

 

“Yes, just as Imka is mine.” Nana said. 

 

“Whose Imka?” Isaac asked behind them. 

 

“The squirrel, obviously,” Lydia replied. 

 

“How long have you known Charlie was my familiar?” Stiles asked, his brows were curved in irritation. Derek thought he looked beautiful. 

 

“I didn’t know for sure, I suspected. I only knew I was correct after we injected you with the potion, and Charlie freed himself to come to your aid.” 

 

Stiles gaped at her, obviously confused. Before he could ask any of the questions Derek was sure he had, Derek leaned over and pulled him into a hug. 

 

Stiles went willingly, his arms coming up to grip him just as tight. 

 

“Stiles,” Derek whispered into his mates shoulder. 

 

“I missed you too, big guy.” Stiles whispered back. 

 

He was okay. Derek let out a breath. Everything was going to be okay. 

 

“Great, I’m glad you’re back Stiles,” Cora said, her voice sounded strained. Derek pulled back to look over at her in concern. “I’m pretty sure I’ve been in labor for the past three hours though, so if Lisa and Nana could come help me with that, that would be great.” 

 

“What?!” Marco grabbed his mate, his eyes wide. “When did- how?” 

 

“It’s fine, Marco, I’m still hours away,” Cora patted his hand. “But I would like some help now that we know Stiles is okay.” 

 

“Of course,” Lisa said, before she took control of the situation and sent everyone to work. Isaac was sent to collect towels and water from the kitchen. Nana and Marco helped Cora to the alphas room, while Lisa went to gather supplies from her own room. 

 

Andy and Jenny took Izzy outside, distracting her from what was happening with her parents. 

 

Riku and Dr. Patel both left, promising to check in the next day. 

 

The only ones left were John, Melissa, Scott and Lydia. Stiles looked over them all, his eyebrows raised in surprise at Lydia, but he froze on Scott. 

 

“So, I can’t help but notice you’ve let your arch nemesis into the house.” 

 

Derek couldn't help himself, he snorted out a laugh, shaking his head fondly. Of course Stiles would skip over Cora giving birth, or the mysterious man with Dr. Patel, and go straight for the drama. 

 

“What?” Stiles asked, but he was smiling. “You guys never get along.” 

 

“Yeah well, Derek’s proven himself to be a pretty cool guy,” Scott said. 

 

Stiles let out a whistle. “Clearly something happened while I was away.” 

 

“A lot happened,” Derek said, before he reached over and grabbed Stiles neck, pushed their foreheads together. “Don’t go away again.” 

 

“I’m not going anywhere, Derek,” Stiles whispered back. “I’m right here.” 

 

\--

 

_ 6 Months Later  _

 

Stiles peered under the curtain into the room next door, watching as the crowd took their seats. He could see baby Nicky, sitting with Marco’s parents in the front row. His dad and Melissa were a few rows behind them, an empty seat saved beside Melissa. Stiles rolled his eyes and turned around again. 

 

“Scott you need to get out of here, we’re almost ready to start.” 

 

“Oh god, no we’re not,” Isaac whined, pacing across the room. They were standing outside the back door to the barn, the place Isaac and Lisa had chosen for their ceremony. Derek had built them an arch, and even covered it with green fabric and sunflowers to match Lisa’s theme. They had rented chairs, and strung up lights and flowers along the walls. The barn, which had yet to turn into a daycare, looked beautiful for a wedding. 

 

After the ceremony they were going to have drinks and snacks on the lawn, and then return to this space with round tables set up for dinner, and a dance floor arranged in the middle of the room. The speakers projected down from the loft, Marco would be the DJ. 

 

It was all planned out. Lisa was due to walk down the aisle in ten minutes. 

 

Isaac had started to panic five minutes ago. 

 

Marco, Andy, Scott, and Stiles all shot Isaac sympathetic looks, but it was Derek’s job, as the best man, to calm him down. 

 

Derek grabbed Isaac by the shoulder and stopped his pacing. “Isaac, you love Lisa. Lisa loves you. You’re going to have a long, beautiful, marriage. There’s nothing to panic about.” 

 

Stiles smirked, Derek had gotten really good at calming people down. Practice makes perfect, after all. 

 

“You’re right,” Isaac let out a breath, “you’re right. We love each other. It’s going to be great. We aren’t going to turn out like my parents-” 

 

“If that’s what you’re worried about, you’re an idiot,” Derek gave Isaac a fond shake. “You’re a good man, Isaac Lahey, you will never be like your dad.” 

 

“Yeah, or, I could probably conjure up your dad now,” Stiles offered with a shrug. “If you needed some closure on that, before your wedding.” 

 

Everyone in the clearing shot him a glare, Stiles held up his hands in defeat. “Okay, okay, too soon. I get it.” 

 

“Maybe later though, with Riku around.” Isaac said, finally calm enough to shoot Stiles a smile. “Derek, I can’t believe you’re actually good at this best man shit,” he added, clapping Derek on the back. 

 

Derek laughed, “I can’t believe you asked me to be your best man.” 

 

“I’m happy we all got to be groomsmen,” Marco said, smiling at his pack. 

 

“I’m just glad I got invited,” Scott said. Stiles laughed, and Derek snorted. The rest of them rolled their eyes. 

 

“Don’t push it,” Andy said, gently pushing Scott away. “If you don’t get to your seat before Lisa starts walking down the aisle, you don’t get to see the wedding.” 

 

Stiles nodded in agreement, this last week before the wedding had been hard enough with all of them planning last minute details. He did not want to see their sweet, kind Lisa, ripping Scott a new one in her wedding dress. 

 

Scott scrambled away, running to the entrance of the barn, and the rest of them focused again on Isaac. He was calm now, and even looked excited. 

 

“You ready?” Stiles asked, checking his watch. “We’re due to walk out in one minute.” 

 

Isaac nodded. “Let’s do this.” 

 

\-- 

 

Stiles stood between Marco and Andy during the ceremony. He watched as Izzy came down the aisle first as a flower girl, beaming up at her dad the whole way down. He smiled as the two woman from Lisa’s old back, her childhood friends, walked down the aisle next. Followed by Cora, who was linked arm in arm with a woman who had raised Lisa from childhood, the Alpha of the pack in Chile. 

 

Marco bowed his head respectfully at the woman as she took her seat, and Cora took her place beside where the bride would soon stand. 

 

Then everyone rose, for Lisa. 

 

She was beautiful. Her dress was more gold than white, and it shone as she walked towards them. Her hair was swirled up in a complicated mix of bun and braids. She walked arm in arm with Lucinda, who looked close to tears as she handed her baby over to Isaac. 

 

Stiles himself felt tears in his eyes as he watched two of his best friends, his pack, the two people who sat with him and never gave up on him, share the happiest moment of their lives. 

 

The tears fell when Isaac’s voice broke during his vows, but he didn’t care. He was happy for his pack. 

 

\-- 

 

Stiles leaned against the barn wall, watching the wedding festivities. Lisa and Isaac were on the dance floor, Lisa’s old pack surrounding them. Lydia, Malia and Kira were out there too. Lydia was wearing flats. Malia and Kira were grinding against each other. If anyone had told him a few years ago this was how his highschool friends would have turned out, he wouldn’t have believed them. 

 

They were all smiling though. So Stiles took it as a win and turned away. 

 

Melissa and his dad were sitting with Scott a few tables away. Stiles watched as his dad rolled his eyes at something Scott said. He still didn’t like Scott, but he was talking to him again. It was a start. 

At the table next to them, Marco and Cora were cooing over their babies. Marco was holding a sleeping Izzy, and Cora was holding a gurgling Nicky. Andy, Sandy and Jenny were sitting across from them, laughing at something Sandy had just said. 

 

Their pack was growing, and it was a beautiful thing. 

 

Stiles scanned the rest of the room. Nana, Priya and Riku stood by the ice sculpture, probably talking about magic. Those three had helped him a lot in the last few months, and Stiles really appreciated them, but he didn’t want to talk to them right now. He wanted a break. 

 

The rest of the guests were mingling around the food and drinks, but Stiles couldn’t find the person he was looking for. 

 

He looked down at Charlie and sighed, “what do you think, bud, should we go find Derek?” 

 

Charlie barked at him and stood up. Ever since their familiar bond had solidified, it really felt like Charlie actually knew what he was saying. The rest of the pack thought it was creepy at times, but Stiles thought it was amazing. 

 

And it meant he didn’t have to worry about Charlie’s short life span anymore. Stiles magic was going to keep him alive and well for years to come. And Charlie’s bond was going to keep Stiles sane and in his own body for the rest of his life. 

 

They made a good team. 

 

The two of them made their way to the barn door, slipping into the cool night air. Stiles scanned the trees and spotted a figure pacing in front of one of the forest trails. Stiles started heading towards him. 

 

“Hey, Sourwolf!” Stiles called halfway there. He watched as Derek froze, and turn towards him. Stiles frowned in concern, “everything okay?” 

 

“Stiles- uh, what are you- everything is fine.” Derek said, but he moved his hands behind his back and his eyes were opened wide, so Stiles didn’t quite believe him. 

 

“Want to try that again?” 

 

Derek shoved his hands in his jacket pocket, cleared his throat. “Everything’s fine.” He said, his voice calm and his face blank. Bless his wolfy little heart, if Stiles didn’t know him well enough, he might have actually believed him. 

 

Instead, Stiles stepped into Derek’s space, “what’s wrong?” 

 

Derek deflated, “nothing, I… I want to talk to you. About something. I was planning on waiting until after the wedding though.” 

 

Stiles glanced behind him, before shrugging, “it’s just dancing now, all the important parts are over. We can talk now.” 

 

“Are you,” Derek swallowed, he was obviously really nervous. “Are you sure?” 

 

“Yeah.” 

 

“Okay, well, I just wanted to- to say,” Derek took a deep breath. “Stiles. Stiles, I’m really proud of you. And, and this past year- these past years with you, have been, um. They’ve been the happiest in my life. Well other than, of course not the times you were hurt, or possessed, that’s not what-” 

 

Stiles felt a smile creep across his face as he watched Derek babble, and suddenly he knew how Lisa had felt that night in Hawaii all those months ago. 

 

He decided to save his future husband the trouble, “Derek, my answer is going to be yes.” 

 

“What? I mean- really? I mean, how did you-?” 

 

Stiles took a step forward and placed a peck on Derek’s lips, stopping his rambling. “Go ahead and ask me, it’s going to be yes.” 

 

Derek watched him move back again with wide eyes, but then he took a breath, and his Derek was standing in front of him again. The calm and cool Derek he knew and loved. He pulled his hand out of his pocket, and a small jewelry box came out with it. He grinned when Stiles stuck out his left hand immediately. 

 

He popped it open, revealing a simple cold band inside. 

 

“Stiles, will you-” 

 

“Yes.” 

 

Derek chuckled, “let me say it.”

 

“Fine.”

 

“Stiles, will you marry me?” Derek asked, pulling the ring out of the box. 

 

“Yes, yes, one hundred times yes.” Derek slipped the ring onto Stiles finger, and pulled him in for a kiss. Stiles jumped up to wrap his legs around his fiance’s waist. 

 

Derek pulled apart a moment later to rest their foreheads together, “I was so nervous.” 

 

“I could tell,” Stiles grinned. “Want to head home early?” 

 

“Of course.” 

 

“Okay, hey Charlie? Go find Nana or Andy, okay? Go back and enjoy the wedding, Daddy Derek and I need some alone time.” 

 

Charlie barked, and ran back towards the barn. Derek looped his arms around Stiles butt and started carrying him towards their cottage. 

 

“I still think that’s creepy.” 

 

“Not creepy, awesome.” 

 

“Creepy.” 

 

“He’s a magic dog, you’re a werewolf, you should bond.” 

 

“Later,” Derek said, pushing their door open with his hip. 

 

Stiles agreed, already diving his tongue back into Derek’s mouth. Derek kicked the door shut behind them, and soon he was laying Stiles down onto their bed. Stiles was quick to pull all their clothes off. 

 

“I want to ride you,” Stiles said, reaching for the lube. “Fuck, I want to ride you, and then I want you to rim me, and then I want to ride you again. I’m all green shnookums, what’s your colour?” 

 

“Green, baby,” Derek was sucking hickies onto Stiles neck, as Stiles reached behind to finger himself open. “I want everything you’re willing to give me.” 

 

Stiles moaned. He worked a few fingers into himself quickly, shoving the bottle at Derek so he could prep too. Soon, he was lowering himself onto Derek’s cock, cursing the whole way. 

 

“Fuck, Derek, you feel so good,” he hissed. Derek ran his hands up and down Stiles legs, his eyes squinted in bliss. As Stiles started to bounce, Derek pushed up to meet him. Stiles could tell by the way Derek’s stomach was already twitching he wasn’t going to last long. He didn’t mind, Stiles loved having sex with Derek. It was perfect no matter what they did together. 

 

Sure enough, Derek came with a moan a few moments later. 

 

“Sorry,” Derek whispered as Stiles pulled off. Stiles shook his head, arranging himself on top of his mate, and moaning when Derek’s hand circled his cock. 

 

“Don’t apologize, you’re beautiful,” Stiles whispered, rocking into Derek’s grip. 

 

“You’re the beautiful one,” Derek said, capturing Stiles lips. It didn’t take long for Stiles to come into Derek’s hand, moaning into Derek’s mouth. They panted against each other, sharing the same breath. 

 

“Thank you,” Stiles whispered, curling into Derek’s side. Derek wrapped his arms around him. 

 

“You don’t have to thank me,” Derek huffed. 

 

“Not for,” Stiles flapped a hand. “Thank you for asking me to marry you. For wanting to marry me.” 

 

Derek looked down at him, his eyes were soft. “Always, Stiles. Always and forever.” 

 

Stiles bit his lip. A few months ago, the idea that Derek had wanted to be with him forever had scared him. He had been so worried about holding Derek back, about hurting him, that he hadn’t let himself even think about getting to this point now. 

 

The point where Stiles felt the exact same back. 

 

If anything happened to Derek, Stiles wasn’t going anywhere. They were in this together. After everything they had been through, they deserved each other. 

 

“Me too,” Stiles whispered. “Always and forever.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The End! Thank you again my dear readers! Leave a comment or a kudos to let me know what you think :)
> 
> Or [come say hi on tumblr!](http://happyjuicyfruit.tumblr.com/)
> 
> And as I said at the top, you will see this gang again. :)


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